But first, could someone please make me a cup of tea?
[Lisbon, Cho and Van Pelt all get up and walk away]
Is that a yes? [Sniffs a few times] Rigsby.
S1 E16Bloodshot
DHDan Hollenbeck
I didn't know you were from Iowa. Famous potatoes, right?
That's Idaho you ignorant jerk.
DHDan Hollenbeck
Oh, yeah? What's Iowa famous for?
Gullible women.
That's not fair.
[Talking about Jane]
He needs to go to a hospital. He has to go if you order him to.
I could, but someone did try to kill him, remember? We can protect him better here. At less expense.
Thanks, Virgil.
Okay. But this is a favor. If you die in this department, I'm responsible. I do all the paperwork. In fact if he does die for whatever reason, move him to a public area, would you? I'd be very grateful.
I hope he's smiling.
Holding something of James' would help me pick up a feel for him. Get a sense of his being.
MMrs. Medina
Okay. Excuse me. [She leaves the room]
Thank you.
"Sense of his being"? What are you playing at?
Just go with it. I have to practice this touchy-feely stuff. It's been a while.
You're not gonna be blind forever.
No, right. Because bad stuff like this doesn't happen nearly as often as people think it does.
[Lisbon and Rigsby are looking for a suspect at a nightclub]
CDClub Doorman
You, little miss fierce, can come in. Lose the backup dancer. He's too, too butch.
[Lisbon shows him her badge]
Get lost, fluffy.
How long will his vision be affected?
FDr. Fuller
It's hard to say, really. The body's healing powers are unpredictable. But 48 to 72 hours is the norm. We must wait and see, so to speak.
Ha, humor. Great. Everybody loves a witty doctor in times of trouble.
Another bomb threat. Third this year.
Not on my phone it isn't.
Well, granted they don't usually come through the CBI, but that's what the drills are for.
The text read, "Are you smart enough to find it?" I think this was directed at me.
Of course you think this is about you.
[Talking about Grace]
Who kissed her?
Didn't catch his name.
It's probably that knucklehead from payroll. He's been stalking her like a chicken. What did this man look like?
[Jane get a text on his phone and he leaves in a hurry]
How do you stalk a chicken?
You know what I'm talking about.
Hey. Aren't you supposed to be in the hospital?
No.
Yes, you are.
They've had enough of me. Officer Powell here was kind enough to give me a ride back.
Well. Thank you...I guess.
Jane, I need to ask you a favor. I need you to, uh...I need you to find out from Van Pelt about this guy she's dating. You know, what's the score?
The score?
Is it serious? Are they, uh, you know?
Ask her yourself.
Yeah, right. No. Come on. You know the situation. It's against the rules, relationships between coworkers.
What are you, a man or a mouse?
A man, obviously.
Could've fooled me.
If it's that guy from payroll, I will kill him.
Well, that would be a strong, romantic statement. Women like a man that would kill for them. Hey, Van Pelt!
Don't!
Grace, personal question. Rigsby and I were wondering, uh...who is this man you were kissing by the coffee cart?
That's...that's none of your business.
Not from payroll?
Payroll? No, he doesn't even work here. It's none of your business.
Well, thank heavens for that, at least. No killing needed.
Don't be so sure.
You'll see. Honesty's best.
Yeah, honestly, I'd like to kick your butt right now.
What the hell?
Oh, doctor's orders. She said it was the best thing for me to do, get back to work.
She did not. She said you insulted the entire ward and were a complete pain in the ass.
Nah. So?
So, you can't do that.
What was I supposed to do, just sit there and listen to television? Besides, the food was terrible.
You need the rest.
I need to work.
You're blind.
It's no problem, honestly. My other senses are heightened. They're super heightened. I'm like Daredevil. Now, if you'll excuse me.
Okay.
[Jane walks off and almost hits a column]
Ah, heightened.
Oh, please don't look at each other like that.
Like what? You can't see.
I can feel. I can feel your pity.
How is he?
Guess what, he's a bad patient.
Who would've thought.
I'm not a bad patient. She's a bad visitor.
S1 E17Carnelian, Inc.
You're very confident of his innocence. How can you be so sure?
Because I asked him if he did it and he said no, he didn't do it.
You suspected he might indeed have done it. But he denied it. You believe him.
Lee don't lie to me. He'll cause me trouble a hundred which ways, but he don't lie to me.
Wives often say that about their husbands. Easy to fool yourself that the people you love are honest.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's The Mentalist pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.