The Legend of Vox Machina quotes

Scanlan

(playing his lute and singing for the tavern keeper's daughter) La, da, da. La, da, da, my lady's rose I will pluck. My love, it's time for us to fu— [Percy is then thrown across the building to their room] For goodness' sakes. Percy, the hell, man? If you want to join in, you got to ask first.

Scanlan

(singing to the council) Brave warriors are we and far more clever than a fox. They'll tell tale of our exploits in the Legend Of Vox Machina!

Keyleth

(vomits)

Scanlan

(like Elvis) Uh, thank you very much.

Pike

(blessing a house) May the Everlight shine upon your home. Everything will be... tip-top. Okay, I'm sure you'll survive these trying times so... good luck?

You all realize we're going to die truly a horrible death.

Perhaps, sister. But we'll die gloriously. And we'll kill a fucking dragon.

(noticing customers in his shop) You have entered a realm of mystery, of magic, of marvel. Welcome to Gilmore's Glorious Goods! Enchanted curios and magical artifacts at discounted prices. I take gold, silver, platinum. (sees Vax, gasps) Why, if it isn't the mysterious Vax'ildan? Oh, I was hoping you would swing back through again.

Vax'ildan

If we survive this. I owe you dinner.

You owe more than that, my handsome half-elf.

Pike

All right, you two, foreplay's over. We should probably find our friends.

The age of man is coming to an end. There was a time when dragons ruled all of Tal'Dorei, when we ruled the entire world!

(last words) I will sunder your bones!

Vex'ahlia

Look who's nice and low.

Grog

(sneers) I would like to... (roaring) RAGE!!!!! (rushes towards Brimscythe and slices his head in half with a blow from his axe, killing the dragon) (groans) Is he dead?

Keyleth

(chuckles softly) We did that! We did that, right?

Percy

It seems being a bunch of assholes has its merits.

Vox Machina, for your selfless heroism, I proclaim you all protectors of the realm and honorary members of the council of Tal'Dorei. I know, I can hardly believe it myself.

Grog

Percy, I say you just walk over to the Briarwoods, say "hello" to break the ice, then punch them in the face. See what happens.

Interestingly enough, we're not originally from Whitestone.

Percy

Of course you're not.

Delilah

Tell me, have you heard how we became caretakers of Whitestone? The official story is that city was administered by the de Rolo family until they succumbed to a rare disease. But I'm afraid the truth is, we concocted that tale to protect their legacy. The sad reality is that the de Rolos abdicated. They grew bored of ruling, and after their children raided the treasury, they abandoned their people to rot.

Percy

LIARS!!!

Scanlan

Uh. it's says Pyramid, Spirits of the De,ad and right here in tiny letters, it says (flips off Vax) ah-fuck you, Vax.

Vax'ildan

Oh, lovely. Care to translate this? (returns a double middle finger)

Pike

CAN YOU TWO STOP?

Vax'ildan

I know we have a lot to talk about, but I'm not turning into a vampire, am I? (Vex nods towards Vax's reflection) I withdraw the question.

Keyleth

Didn't know about your past. But I guess none of us ever share that kind of stuff, huh? I may never see my family again.

Percy

What?

Keyleth

Yeah. My Aramenté. I don't get to go home until I complete it and prove myself worthy. Which might not happen, so...

Percy

I didn't know that.

Keyleth

I'm just saying, I know you think you're alone. That we don't know what you're going through. But you don't have to be.

Percy

I appreciate that, Keyleth, truly. And for the record, I think you're damn worthy. But there's a world of difference between your struggle and mine. Whether you succeed or fail, your family is still alive.

Vax'ildan

Dagger, dagger, dagger... wooden stake.