Rose, Dorothy and others in “Have Yourself a Very Little Christmas”

Rose

I sure miss a traditional St. Olaf Christmas.

Dorothy

Excuse me, Rose, do we have time to run out and get hit by a bus?

Rose

First there'd be the Christmas pageant with the shepherds and the angels, and the Two Wise Men.

Blanche

There were three wise men, Rose.

Rose

Not in St. Olaf. Then we'd all go down to the town square and try to form a circle, and then we'd all go home and smoke kippers.

Blanche

Why, Rose?

Rose

Because it's the best way to get your house to smell like kippers. And then, in keeping with the spirit of Christmas, it was traditional to let all the animals sleep inside that night. And then the next morning the rumors would start... and they'd continue until New Year's, and we'd all make resolutions that it would never happen again. But then the next year, all it took was a little eggnog and one wise guy saying, "What the hell, it's Christmas!"