Nurse, now we realize that the hospital has rules and you have to try to uphold those rules. But, you have to realize that this is a very special case. So, I'm gonna quote from the Bible just to show you how determined we really are. Now, the good book says, um, oh, "Neither rain, nor sleet, nor....nor dark of night shall keepeth uth...from our appointed rounds." Amen. [The nurse gives Blanche a look.] I can see you are a non-believer.
“Home Again, Rose” · Season 7, Episode 22
In this episode: Dorothy Zbornak (5), Blanche Devereaux (4), Rose Nylund (3), Sophia Petrillo (2)
[to Blanche] I think it's nice that you're trying to quote the Bible. [aside, to Sophia] The only thing that's been in more hotel rooms than she has and she can't remember a word of it.
JJanet
Oh, you know how I feel about organized religion, it makes me crazy. And I do not want Sarah's head filled with stories about a God who may or may not exist.
Well, honey, of course He exists! Just look at the beautiful sky, the majestic trees. God created man and gave him a heart and a mind and thighs that could crack walnuts.
JJanet
[putting an arm around Sarah] Mother!
Oh, I'm sorry... I came to religion late.
JJanet
I'd say.
But it's never too late! And it is my fervent hope that the three of us, you and I and dear little Sarah, may walk the path of righteousness together. And now if you'll excuse me, I have Gideon Bibles for everyone. [leaves room]
SSarah
I miss "sexy" Grandma.
JJanet
I'm sure a lot of people do, darlin', I'm sure a lot of people do.
[At the reunion, Rose goes over to the other girls holding several pieces of paper.]
Where've you been?
When no one was looking, I went by the No-Show table and I got four name tags for us! Blanche, you'll be Susan Armstrong... [gives Blanche a name tag] ...and Dorothy, you'll be Cindy Lou Peeples... [gives Dorothy a name tag] ...and Sophia, you're Myron Zucker. [gives an irked Sophia a name tag]
Rose, you idiot, there's no way I'm ever gonna pass for a man! Dorothy, trade with me?
Go to hell, Myron. Rose, I don't wanna wear this.
Oh come on, I looked in the yearbook and you're a dead ringer for Cindy Lou Peeples.
I don't know...
Trust me, it'll work, or my name isn't Kim Fung Toi [pasting tag to her shirt].
Oh I HATE reunions! Everyone so dressed up and fake, pretending to be someone they're not. Why can't people just be themselves?
RGRandom Guy
Cindy Lou Peeples?
Tommy Lunt?
DGDorothy and the guy
[the two act as if they ARE the people in question, embrace and walk off together] AAH! AAH!
LTLarry Tucker
[to Sophia] Excuse me...aren't you Mrs. Gonzalez, Spanish 101?
Sí!
LLarry
Hi, Larry Tucker! [shakes Sophia's hand] You know, I-I was always afraid to tell you this when I was in your class, but... [shyly] I had a huge crush on you back then!
Why didn't you ever do anything about it?
LLarry
Mrs. Gonzalez -- you were my teacher!
And you were my favorite student. But I'm not your teacher anymore. And Mr. Gonzalez is dead. [pause] Let's mambo! [grabs Larry and starts dancing with him]
My great-grandfather once removed his neighbor's appendix, and he wasn't even sick!
Why would he do that?
Let's just say they were playing poker and the stakes got a little high.
[on studying old yearbooks to fit in at the class reunion] We have to know all the basics, you know, like, oh, senior class president, quarterback of the football team, class slut.
Blanche, how do you tell a slut from a yearbook?
Oh - how do you tell a slut from a yearbook? Uh... you don't have to buy a yearbook dinner!
Rose...
You can take a yearbook home to your parents!
Rose!
There's nothing wrong with having a yearbook on the coffee table!
Rose, this isn't a riddle.
Well, make it one! I had three good answers!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's The Golden Girls pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.