Raven quotes from That's So Raven

You remember that pony I had?

Raven

Yeah

Made it up

Raven

Well you remember that soccer trophy I had?

Uh huh

Raven

Garage sale. $2.50.

Tanya

Today, we are going to be working on "Romeo and Juliet." Can anyone tell me what this play is about?

Raven

Boy likes girl, girl likes boy. They both die. Cry, cry, cry. The end.

Chelsea

Ugh, it's locked!

Raven

I just said that.

Chelsea

I know.

Raven

Mom, if you love me, you'll start dragging my sorry butt home right now!

Tanya

I'm going to talk to your father first and we'll see how sorry your butt is!

Raven

I'm feeling kinda sick. Could you take me home?

No problem, just let me get the check. Waiter? Waiter? Waiter?

Raven

[fed up and screams] WAITER!

Raven

I love this picture of me and my folks. We were so happy

Chelsea

Where's Cory?

Raven

He wasn't born yet. That's why we were so happy.

Tell your mother everything is fine.

Raven

Hey, Mom! We haven't eaten for days, your plants are dead, and I'm dropping out of school. Love ya, bye.

Raven

[as Liz Anya] Do you know who I be? Does you listen to music?

Eddie

[as Liz Anya's bodyguard] Do you watch TV?

Chelsea

[as Liz Anya's executive] Do you carry a lunch box?

Chelsea

[in strong British accent] Yeah, Liz Anya can't just sing cold!

Eddie

[as Liz Anya's bodyguard] Y-Yeah, you see, Liz Anya's always better warmed up.

Raven

'[as Liz Anya] 'Just have Victor prepare my usual.

Ummm, Victor doesn't work here anymore!

SHHHHHH!!!!

Eddie

Don't SHHHHHH her!

Raven

[as liz Anya] GET ME J.LO!!!!

Chelsea

OHHHHHH, YOU DONE IT NOW!!!!

Chelsea

[calls Cory]

Raven

[as Liz Anya] Hey, girlfriend, you know I'm down here at Augustine's and this fool fired Victor! I-I know. She wants to talk to you.

S-She wants to talk to me!

Eddie

Don't look at the phone, brotha.

' Hi! Mrs. Lopez, I'm a really big fan.

Cory

If you want to see my back get Victor back!, [Victor walks in and hears Cory][Cory] Mom said all boys voice change when they get older. [Cory runs to his room immediately]

Tanya

You know there's going to be live enteriment opening night.

Raven

What? Mom..[Grabs mic] PEOPLE! PEOPLE! PEOPLE!, listen up people. Okay? This place has to be cool because, as we all know, it is a reflection upon me! So the following things are uncool. Mom scatting - yeah, that's got to go.

Raven

Two, Dad's face on these flyers - gotta go. [bobs head]

[tossing a tomato up and down] Just say the word, Dad. [kisses tomato]

Raven

Three, Corey - gotta go. You know what? Actually, make Cory number one. So from the top...

It... slipped?

Raven

My foot is gonna slip.

Raven

Come Here!

Raven

You guys! Major news! Devon Carter said that he's gonna try to make it to the grand opening. Do you know what this means?!?

Chelsea

Yeah, more work for us.

Raven

[giggles] Exactly! Chelsea, I'm gonna need a wardrobe conference and Eddie, I'm gonna need egg roll recipes.

Eddie

Ok, but, uh, what if we have other plans?

Raven

[snickers in disbelief] Plans that I don't know about? That is pretty hilarious! [bursts into laughter]

Eddie

But seriously, Rae. We do have other plans.

Raven

[skeptically] What y'all doin'?

Eddie

Actually, we're bowling and surfing.

Chelsea

Ye-yeah, right! Right. We are blurfing...Yes...

Raven

Blurfing?

Chelsea

Mmhmm.

Eddie

Y-yeah, see, uh, see you, uh, you bowl on a surf board and it's cool except for, you know, the, uh, the board scratches the lanes 'cause they still workin' out the kinks and stuff like that...

Raven

So, umm, y'all can't help out 'cause you gotta blurf?

Chelsea

Yeah, Rae. Well, ya know, it's not us. We're in a league, sorry. Eddie, we better go.

Eddie

Yeah, let's get up out of here.

Raven

Well now i know what 'Blurfing' is!

Victor

What did you see?

Raven

It was a disaster. Eddie and Chelsea they looked like they were about to..to [makes kissy face]...kiss.. [imitating kissy face]

Victor

So, why is that so bad?

Raven

Because dad, we have always been a threesome, if they become a twosome, then I become a onesome. Then if they break up we're gonna be three onesomes, which is definitely not as good as one threesome!

Victor

Rae, sometimes your visions aren't exactly what you think they are. Look, why don't you just ask Eddie and Chelsea straight up what's going on?

Raven

Yeah. I guess you're right.

Raven

Hey! So, what's going on with you two? [Raven glares suspiciously]

Nothing. [Innocently looking]

Raven

Oh? 'Cause, um, [sniffs and sucks teeth] lately it's kinda seemed like something.

Chelsea

Well, uh, sometimes nothing can seem like something... [trying to play it off]

Raven

And yet sometimes something can actually be 'something'.

Eddie

Unless it's nothing.

Raven

Nothing yet or nothing at all 'cause if it's nothing at all we can do it to-geth-er...

Eddie

Can't.

Raven

Why not?

Chelsea

Because if three people do nothing, then it actually becomes something.

Raven

[to herself] Girl, you are so ready for that Blue Rain concert.

Victor

So am I!

Raven

How many ping pong balls are in the jar?

Chelsea

[concentrates very hard] 237!

Raven

[looks at jar and finds answer is right, is amazed and scared] Chels, how'd you know that?

Chelsea

Isn't it obvious? [Raven and Eddie back away]