Stiles quotes from Teen Wolf

Liam

[to Scott] Werewolf? [to Malia] Werecoyote. [to Lydia] Banshee. [to Kira] Fox?

Kira

Kitsune. But, fox works.

Liam

[to Stiles] What are you?

Stiles

Uh, for a little while, I was possessed by an evil spirit. It was very evil.

Liam

And what are you now?

Stiles

[shrugs] Better?

Lydia

What am I supposed to do with the hordes gathering outside the door?

Stiles

Lydia, who throws the best parties in Beacon Hills?

Lydia

[shrieks in frustration] What? Me, obviously!

Stiles

Okay, then throw a party!

Stiles

Just breathe, okay? I'm not going to leave you.

Malia

What if I hurt you?

Stiles

You're not going to!

Malia

But I want to. Ugh! I look at your face, and I want to smash it! I want to tear it! I want to feel your bones crack between my hands!

Stiles

[unfazed] Surprisingly enough, you're not the first person to ever say something like that. I'm not leaving you, and I'm not going to let you hurt anyone.

Stiles

First, you need to know that the code was broken with a cipher key.

Wait. You mean, like, a... like a keyword?

Stiles

It's actually a name.

Scott

[gulps anxiously] "Allison."

Kira

Maybe instead of trying to find a lacrosse stick with a hidden dagger in it, we should be trying to get the game cancelled?

Scott

The game's the best way to catch him red-handed.

Scott

Or Liam. Well, we don't have the whole list, and he could be on it.

Stiles

We don't know anything about that list! How it's made, how it's updated... I mean, who's been out taking a supernatural census, anyway?

Scott

I'm not afraid.

Kira

Neither am I.

Stiles

[incredulous] Well, I'm terrified, and I'm not even on the list! Guys, these are professional killers! It's their profession! One of them's got a thermo-cut wire that cuts heads off! Who knows what else they have?

Kira

Why do I feel like this is going to end badly?

Stiles

Because it usually does.

Okay, that's kind of terrifying. What's the number?

Lydia

...That's how much you're worth.

[offended] I'm worth five dollars?!

Stiles

[holds up a hand] Five million.

I only make 40,000 a year. Maybe I should kill myself.

Brunski

Okay, Deputy. How about you come back with a court order, then I'll listen. As for you, Mr. Stilinski, how about you come back with payment in full? That's right, Daddy might be the Sheriff, but he's late on the bills. I guess those government jobs aren't as reliable as they used to be, huh?

But, they do help when you need a favor. Like, how a month ago, Canaan P.D. helped you get home after blowing 0.1 on a breathalyzer?

Stiles

[mocks Brunski gleefully] No!

Brunski

[embarrassed] All right. I'm not against a little quid pro quo. Not at all. Not at all.

Stiles

[to Parrish] You. You, I like you! I'm gonna keep you!

Stiles

Okay, well, we know one thing-- both of the first two keys, "Allison" and "Aiden," they're both names of the dead. Right?

Lydia

But, we've already tried every other dead person's name we could think of. And, if you haven't noticed, there were a lot of tries.

Scott

I don't understand any of this. Why would someone use all this money just to kill us?

Stiles

Someone wants you dead, dude. Badly.

Kira

Where's Lydia?

Stiles

She took it her freshman year.

Malia

Does that mean I could have taken it some other time?

Scott

Malia, you studied harder for this than any of us!

Malia

Doesn't mean I'm going to do good.

Stiles

"Well."

Malia

[confused] Well, what?

Stiles

It's "do well," not "good."

Malia

[panics] Oh, god!

Stiles

Bet they're thinking smallpox.

Not likely. Smallpox was eradicated worldwide in 1979. We've only managed to completely eradicate two viruses in history. The other was rinderpest. It killed cows.

Stiles

So, we should be comforted by that, right?

Unless it's something worse.

Malia

I know you think you're trying to protect me, but I can handle it. I know I'm on the list.

Stiles

[anxious] ...Yes.

Malia

So, how much?

Stiles

How much what?

Malia

How much am I worth?

Scott

...Four million.

Stiles

Are you okay?

Malia

Yeah. Scott's worth twenty-five, Kira, six. They'll take you guys out way before me!

Stiles

That's progress. That's progress.

Scott

[about Malia] We need to tell her the truth about Peter. She's going to see the rest of the deadpool eventually.

Stiles

Try to remember that Peter is the one name missing on that list. Which either makes him incredibly lucky or the Benefactor. If she finds out about him, she's going to go to him. You know she is. And then, he's going to twist his way into her head like he does with everyone, including us. We let him walk around like nothing ever happened, like he's one of the good guys, but Scott, he's not one of the good guys. If she finds out about him, she's gone. That's probably what he's waiting for. And then he wins, we lose.

Scott

We're already losing.