Reverend Jim quotes from Taxi

Reverend Jim

I once lived with a woman for three years before I realized I loved her. In fact, I lived with her for three years before I realized I lived with her. What a woman! I might have married her.

Elaine

Why didn't you?

Reverend Jim

I said I might have. I don't remember.

Louie

You see this yellow circle? See? What you need to do, is move it around with this stick, and eat up all the dots.

Reverend Jim

[starting forward; excited] Oh!

Louie

[stopping him] Wait, wait! There's more!

Reverend Jim

[amazed] MORE?

Louie

Yes! More! You see those monsters? These monsters chase you around the maze and they try to eat you.

Reverend Jim

[eyes bugging out] WHOA!

Louie

[struggling to hold the excited Jim back] Iggy, Iggy... easy now, you see- you see those flashing blue lights? Those are energizers, if you eat them, the- the monsters turn blue and if you eat them... you get points for eating them!

Reverend Jim

[shaking Louie, unable to control his enthusiasm] Please, boss! Please! Please!

Louie

[still struggling to hold Jim back] Boy! I love his enthusiasm!

Tony

You mean, they didn't tell you they were going to tear down your apartment building?

Reverend Jim

Well, you put up with a few minor inconveniences when you live in a condemned building.

Louie

Jim, your father is no longer with us.

Reverend Jim

He never was. He lives in Boston.

Louie

No, I mean, he's gone on to his final resting place.

Reverend Jim

A condo in Palm Beach?

Simka

I have bad news for you my darling. I have been faithful to you.

Latka

Oh no!

Reverend Jim

Now this is where I get confused. If I can only get over this part I know I can help.

Reverend Jim

Something terrible has just happened.

Tony

What?

Reverend Jim

I forgot why I am doing this.

Louie

Okay, who wants a really good cab today?

Reverend Jim

I do boss.

Louie

Good, I'm glad you do Iggy. You know the rules now.

Reverend Jim

Okie doke. How much do you want?

Louie

$48,000.

Reverend Jim

Okay, but if I'm gonna pay that kind of money I want a cab with a heater.

Reverend Jim

I bought Mario's. Signed the papers this morning and I've been running the place ever since.

Tony

Jim, Why Mario's?

Reverend Jim

You wouldn't believe what they were asking for Disney World.

Alex

Jim, Mario's has been on the skids for years. I mean mortuaries do better return business.

Latka

The tradition of my country forces me to protest.

Reverend Jim

Come on, take the money.

Latka

Oh I'll take the money, but first I have to protest. No! No! No! I won't take it. This is an insult! [takes the money] Thank you very much.

Alex

Jim, you give a thousand bucks to Louie De Palma, you better be there to see that he gives it to somebody. Otherwise, he's going to pocket that money himself and lie about it.

Reverend Jim

Will you do that?

Louie

Of course.