Oh, look at me! I was so cute and cuddly! And so playful. And so smart.
And so curious. Like the time you got stuck in the tree? Or the time you got stuck--
Alright, enough pictures of me.
S1Baby Pictures
That's the day I brought you home from the pet store.
That was the best day of my life.
I felt the same way. And when you winked at me, you cinched it.
You're a great kid, Stanley.
And you're a great fish, Dennis.
Stanley, you were a magnificent baby. You were very cute, very cuddly, and your favorite food was mashed corn. [a photo shows baby Stanley with a bowl of mashed corn on his head]
MMark
It was also your favorite hat.
Oh, I remember how much I loved to feed you, to bathe you, to rock you to sleep in my arms...
MMark
And boy, did you love animals, Stanley. As soon as you started crawling, you were always making friends with cats, dogs, fish, you name it.
And then when you started walking and talking, it was always, "Take me to the zoo, take me to the zoo!"
MMark
Now, look how much you've grown. You can ride a two-wheeler, you go to school, you can even read.
You're not my little baby anymore [hugs Stanley] You've grown into a wonderful child, who will someday be a wonderful grown-up.
A... a grown-up?
MMark
Sure, Stanley. Before you know it, you and your brother will be all grown up and living on your own.
I'm not sure I want to be a grown-up, Dennis. I sure don't want to move out of the house. I think I want to be a baby. As a matter of fact, I know I'd rather be a baby again.
But Stanley, then you couldn't ride your scooter, and you couldn't go to school, and you couldn't play soccer with Mimi and Marci.
Who's gonna help me with my homework? Who's gonna tuck me in at night? I'm not ready to be a grown-up!
S1The Big Spill
MMark
Stanley! Time for breakfast!
Coming!
MMark
Good morning, Animal Boy.
Morning, daddy. Is it okay if I get Dennis his breakfast first?
MMark
Sure thing! I think it's great the way you take care of that little fishy of yours.
[irritated] "Little fishy"?! Did he say "little fishy"?!
Now let's see. What would you like for breakfast today? Oatmeal, pancakes, poached eggs on toast?
Very amusing, Stanley. Fish flakes will do quite nicely, as always.
Of course, I can make my own breakfast. I made yours, didn't I?
It was quite, quite delicious, and beautifully served, might I add.
All I need is cereal... [takes a cereal box from out of the cabinet] Yes! Animal Smackos! And then, of course, I need milk.
[Stanley gets the milk, and takes it and the cereal to the table.]
I pour the cereal into the bowl. [does so]
Very nicely done!
Then I pour the milk into the bowl. [does so]
[worried] Watch out, don't spill.
Didn't spill a drop!
Bravo, Stanley!
And the only thing left to do is eat.
[Stanley grabs the mat his bowl of cereal is resting on, but he pulls too hard, sending the cereal bowl and Dennis' fishbowl off the table.]
Whoa, WHOA!
[Dennis screams as his fishbowl goes over the table, but Stanley manages to catch him in time. But the cereal has been spilled on the floor.]
Oh, no!
A bit of a mess-up, I'm afraid.
[watching the anteater] That tongue is so cool. I can't wait to see it lick up all the milk and cereal I spilled. [runs up to the anteater] Come on, Mr. Anteater. I gotta get you back home right now.
But Stanley, wait! Wait!
[Stanley grabs Dennis, and he jumps out of the book with him and the anteater.]
What were you saying, Dennis?
I was saying, "Wait, wait". Anteaters eat ants, you see.
Yes, I know that.
They do not eat milk and cereal.
[The anteater sniffs the spilled milk and cereal, and leaves.]
Oh. Not even Animal Smackos?
No, Stanley. You'd have to have spilled a bowl of ants to get this fella to help you clean up.
S1In a While, Crocodile
[The crocodiles start approaching Stanley and Dennis in the rowboat.]
And now, for another important lesson. Sometimes, we have to... ROW VERY FAST!!!
[after escaping the crocodiles] That was close.
We almost lost more than our baby teeth, didn't we?
S1The Color of Stanley
Am I seeing things, or is Stanley changing colors?
I'm changing colors? I'm not trying to.
This is the part of changing colors I was talking about, Stanley. Chameleons often change color depending on how they feel, and they can't really control it.
I guess we turn brown when we're not feeling well?
I'm afraid so, Stanley.
[pointing up] Look! He's changing again!
[Stanley, with a rather annoyed look on his face, changes his color from brown to blue-and-red stripes.]
That's pretty.
[concerned] It's not meant to be pretty, Harry. These bright stripes usually mean a chameleon is getting angry.
I am angry! [squeals angrily] I was thinking about Lionel and... "the dudes", and how I wouldn't be out here eating nasty bugs if I didn't wanna be like them. [he squeals again as he turns black]
He's turning black!
[nervous] Ooh. That means he's really mad.
Why are you so mad, Stanley?
Because I was wrong about chameleons. [squeals] They can't just change colors to fit in whenever they want.
That's right, Stanley. Chameleons can't hide their feelings any more than you can hide who you are around the big boys.
[resigned] Great. [turns brown] I guess it won't do me any good to be a chameleon then.
We're glad you can't be anybody but Stanley, Stanley.
[turns green as his mood brightens] Really?
Who else would take us on crazy adventures?
And tell us about other animals?
And be our very best friend?
Well, then, I guess I just have to be... me.
S1Searching for Spring
[On a late winter's day, Stanley takes Dennis outside.]
It's awfully chilly out here, Stanley. What is it you wanted to show me?
[Stanley sees a giant pile of melted snow before him.]
OH, NO!
[Marci and Mimi come running.]
What's the matter, Stanley?
Look at Dennis' surprise!
MMMarci and Mimi
Uh-oh.
Well, I must say, I am surprised, Stanley. And I'm sure you know how much I appreciate, um... big... snow... lumps.
But yesterday, it was a giant snow goldfish!
MMimi
It looked just like you, Dennis!
Only bigger, of course.
[Stanley kicks the melted snow pile in frustration.]
I'm sorry, Dennis.
No need to apologize. Snow tends to melt quite quickly in late winter.
MMimi
Yeah, and turn to mucky, ucky slush!
It's no fun playing outside anymore.
You said it. It takes forever to put on a snowsuit.
And mittens.
MMimi
And boots.
And this stupid cap. And then there's nothing to do except watch everything melt and get muddy.
I want it to be spring right now.
Yeah!
MMimi
Me too.
That would be lovely, of course. But I'm afraid it's not gonna happen overnight.
[calmly, about the Great Big Book of Everything song] This song of yours is utterly delightful. I adore hearing you sing it every time.
HEHarry and Elsie
[surprised and confused] You do?
[angrily] NOT!
Whoa. I was freaked out for a minute there.
Me too.
S1Save the Bluebird!
I'm gonna save all the endangered animals on Earth, Dennis!
That's a rather large job, don't you think?
Not for me. I've got it all figured out. A lot of animals are losing their homes because people keep cutting down forests.
That's certainly true.
So I'm gonna invite all the endangered animals to come live with us!
Here? In your room?
Well, sort of. It'll be great. I'll open the Stanley Griff Animal Hotel, see?
[Stanley imagines refurbishing his house into a hotel for all the animals of the world.]
Don't worry, everybody! You'll be safe here! This way, alligators. How's it goin', sea lions? You're gonna love it here tigers.
Excuse me! Stanley!
Not now, Dennis. I'm welcoming my guests.
Yes, but it's about those guests for yours. I think you're making a big mistake.
[Stanley's fantasy ends.]
Mistake? How can helping endangered animals be a mistake?
Well, you see, Stanley, there are lots and lots of endangered animals in the world.
I know! And I'll save 'em all!
And I really wish you could. But the truth is, they don't all get along with each other. If you open the Stanley Griff Animal Hotel, you would have big problems, I'm afraid.
[Stanley returns to his fantasy, all the animals inside his hotel are fighting. A scared rooster flies out the window, crowing.]
Stop! Stop!
[All the animals flee from the hotel.]
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Stanley pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.