Then in short, Dr. Armstrong, you never acknowledged the possibility of a genuine heart condition, in this case, infective endocarditis, which crossed the placenta and triggered premature labor.
[Struggling to answer the question] I... I... ..
Dr. Fiscus[Stands to address Dr. Craig, Dr. Westfall, and Dr. Auschlander] To be honest, Mrs. Chambers' valve murmur was almost inaudible. I must have big ears. [Snickers after his joke]
Hardly seems the time for wisecracks.
Dr. Fiscus
Sorry.
[Fiscus sits down]
[Trying to hold back her emotions] I'm having trouble concentrating. I was in court earlier today.
I think we all understand that, Wendy. The point is, had you spotted her condition earlier in the clinic, she could have been put on IV antibiotics.
And probably she'd still be carrying that child.
Dr. Fiscus
Wanna bet how long it takes this three-year-old to pass a mood ring?
Dr. Fiscus
How about Peter? He's good at beating the odds.
[Morrison approaches White] Let's have a look at this skull series.
The waters' view is clear.
You think Megan and Timothy have changed much?
Probably. But they're still your kids.
I'm telling ya, I'm gonna put things back together with Myra.
Dr. Fiscus
Good. Then you can go up to the psych ward and tell Cathy Martin you're sorry you put her in a straight jacket.
Dr. Fiscus
Jack, you haven't lived till you've seen Peter in action. I had the good fortune to catch his act once, and believe me, he's got a certain way with women. Unfortunately, it's a felony.
You know, you really oughta talk, Fiscus. There isn't a woman in this hospital you haven't hit on.
Dr. Fiscus
Took a lot of hard work, concentration, and a ski mask to get Peter where he is today. You know something for Myra's sake, I hope she's found another man.
[White and Fiscus have a scuffle]
[Stepping in to break up the scuffle] Enough! That's enough, all right? That's enough, Peter!
[Peter takes his X-rays and walks out]
Why can't you leave him alone? Why can't everybody just leave him alone?
Dr. Fiscus
He's doing a con job on you, Jack, and I don't know why you just lie back and enjoy it.
Now where did you find this little piece of gradue, Boy's Life?
Dr. Fiscus
Journal of the American Medical Association. It's a documented phenomenon.
So is psychic surgery, Fiscus. But I wouldn't want to trust my gallbladder to it.
Dr. Fiscus
You still want me to repeat the autopsy?
You're damn right. Nightmare death syndrome of all the lame-Why MacArthur ever wanted to return to the Philippines is beyond me.
Dr. Fiscus
I don't know what it is with you, Boomer. All your patients seem to be going south lately.
Fiscus, why the hell you gotta make a smart remark about everything?
Whoa, Jack, take it easy.
Hey, hey, hey, why don't you shut up! Philip, I don't need you telling me what to do or how to treat my patients. Don't question my medical judgement. Okay? All right? I'm just as good a doctor as either of you.
[Chandler and Fiscus are in the lounge watching Ehrlich's latest Health Spot on the evening news, talking over Victor as they make commentary]
Let's say you have an accident of some kind. What happens next? You call an ambulance.
And bribe the driver to take you to Boston General instead of this place.
...where friendly, well-trained doctors will administer up-to-date medical treatment. Waiting is kept to a minimum through modern hospital management techniques that put the needs of the patient first and foremost. From the ER, you'll be whisked up to your room by...
Dr. Fiscus
Lovely Carol Merrill, who will take your clothing, rifle through your belongings, and palpate you into submission.
An experienced senior doctor will be directly in charge of your case, and will carefully explain your condition and the length of time you'll be required to stay. Should there be any discomfort involved, modern analgesics are always available.
Dr. Fiscus
From dealers loitering in our hallways.
Physical therapy and other hospital services are scheduled at your convenience, and nutritious meals are served promptly from heated carts at your bedside.
He forgot to mention tennis courts and scuba lessons.
...during regularly scheduled visiting hours, and often play a positive role in the healing process.
Dr. Fiscus
And when you receive your hospital bill, you'll have a heart attack and be whisked back upstairs by courteous attendants.
Are you as sick of these Health Spots as I am?
...hospital etiquette. Until then, I'm Dr. Victor Ehrlich with another Health Spot.
[Fiscus gets up and turns off the TV]
Dr. Fiscus
What can I do for you?
MDMichael Dukakis
I was out jogging and I think I've done something to this ankle of mine.
Dr. Fiscus
All right. Name?
MDMichael Dukakis
Michael Dukakis.
Dr. Fiscus
And your occupation?
MDMichael Dukakis
Governor.
Dr. Fiscus
Governor of what?
MDMichael Dukakis
Of the Commonwealth of Massachusetts.
Dr. Fiscus
Baloney, that's what's his name?
MDMichael Dukakis
I'm what's his name.
Dr. Fiscus
Look, I don't have time for this. Address?
MDMichael Dukakis
The State House, Boston.
Dr. Fiscus
Elliott?
Dr. Fiscus
This phony is for you. Tape up his ankle until his eyes bug out.
[Surprised to see Governor Dukakis] Governor Dukakis, what are you doing here?
MDMichael Dukakis
I was out running and I...
[Rushes to approach him and escort him to the emergency room] Oh, wait, wait, let me get it. Lean on me, real hard. Okay, come on. We'll get you over there.
St. Elsewhere · 129 quotes
