I guess I never had to be concerned with the big issues of race relations. I always dealt with people one on one. I mean, we're friends aren't we? [silence] Aren't we?
Dr. ChandlerLook, Jack, I'd like to say "Sure. No problem. We're friends. Everything's fine." But I can't. There's things you'll never understand because you're white. I'm not trying to pass judgment but there are things you'll never understand about your wife because she's a woman.
Yeah, but she's still my wife and we're still friends.
Hey, look. Just because you made a mistake with a patient this morning, don't be carrying that around on your shoulders like that's the last mistake you'll ever make.
Dr. Chandler
Look. You don't anything about the case. You don't know anything about anything, so why don't you just shut the hell up.
Why don't you take it easy?
Dr. Chandler
No, you take it easy. You take it easy. You know, you're in no position to make remarks about anything around here, because you don't know anything.
Dr. Chandler
You give your patients the wrong antibiotics, you don't know what medications they're on and you write the worst progress notes. You're pathetic. Pathetic! [begins to walk away] And another thing... if it weren't for everybody covering for your mistakes, you would've been gone months ago!
Boy, do you look terrible.
Did you call me out here to tell you that?
Wasn't Ehrlich supposed to be on rounds with you this morning?
Yes, he was. I got a message he's not going to be here. He's involved in some research project.
What is it with these residents? Is every day the Fourth of July? I mean, I need him to assist me in surgery. Kiley dropped out just a minute ago.
Any of you know what project Ehrlich is involved in?
Dr. Chandler
Dream research.
Dream res--- Flim flam, pure and simple. Why do these funding people let the wool be pulled over their eyes using hard earned tax dollars for useless research? I don't even know why you let this Ellis woman have space in the hospital.
Mark, I had nothing to do with it.
Dream research. That kind of malarkey really singes my drawers. Yeah, well, Ehrlich just better be enjoying his dreams while he can, because here comes a living nightmare.
[Chandler stands in his way accidentally]
Can't you see I'm in a hurry?
I don't know what it is with you, Boomer. All your patients seem to be going south lately.
Fiscus, why the hell you gotta make a smart remark about everything?
Dr. Chandler
Whoa, Jack, take it easy.
Hey, hey, hey, why don't you shut up! Philip, I don't need you telling me what to do or how to treat my patients. Don't question my medical judgement. Okay? All right? I'm just as good a doctor as either of you.
[Chandler and Fiscus are in the lounge watching Ehrlich's latest Health Spot on the evening news, talking over Victor as they make commentary]
Let's say you have an accident of some kind. What happens next? You call an ambulance.
Dr. Chandler
And bribe the driver to take you to Boston General instead of this place.
...where friendly, well-trained doctors will administer up-to-date medical treatment. Waiting is kept to a minimum through modern hospital management techniques that put the needs of the patient first and foremost. From the ER, you'll be whisked up to your room by...
Lovely Carol Merrill, who will take your clothing, rifle through your belongings, and palpate you into submission.
An experienced senior doctor will be directly in charge of your case, and will carefully explain your condition and the length of time you'll be required to stay. Should there be any discomfort involved, modern analgesics are always available.
From dealers loitering in our hallways.
Physical therapy and other hospital services are scheduled at your convenience, and nutritious meals are served promptly from heated carts at your bedside.
Dr. Chandler
He forgot to mention tennis courts and scuba lessons.
...during regularly scheduled visiting hours, and often play a positive role in the healing process.
And when you receive your hospital bill, you'll have a heart attack and be whisked back upstairs by courteous attendants.
Dr. Chandler
Are you as sick of these Health Spots as I am?
...hospital etiquette. Until then, I'm Dr. Victor Ehrlich with another Health Spot.
[Fiscus gets up and turns off the TV]
St. Elsewhere · 129 quotes
