Mr. Garrison, Jenny and others in “Proper Condom Use”

Now, class, who can tell me what a condom is? Yes, Jenny?

It flies around and it's endangered.

That's a condor, Jenny. Condor. Condoms are what we use to stop the spread of STD's. Yes, Fillmore?

Can we do finger paints?

NO, WE CAN'T DO FINGER PAINTS!! You kids want herpes, huh? How about a nice bucket of AIDS? Sounds good? Now pay attention, all right? I'm going to show you the proper way to put on a condom. [pulls out a box of condoms and a dildo] First of all, you remove the condom from its package. Then you find which way the condom rolls out. Put it in your mouth [he does so] ...and apply. [it pans to the kids watching as he demonstrates on the dildo; one of the kids starts to cry] And it's as easy as that. Any questions?