Say, Eric, do you like fishsticks?
Yeah?
Do you like putting fishsticks in your mouth?
Yeah?
Well, what are you, Eric? A gay fish?
[thinks for a second] Fish...dicks. Aww, dude, that is funny as shit!
“Fishsticks” · Season 13, Episode 5
In this episode: Kanye West (4), Eric Cartman (2), Jimmy (1), Craig (1)
Because I am a genius I have ascertained that fish have gills. Doctor do I have gills?
DDoctor
He does not have gills.
You hear that? No gills! So I can't be a fish! And I'm a genius voice of a generation so I'm not gay! So that is that. Alright! It's over! Now are there any questions!?
RReporter
Do You like Fishsticks?
Love um.
RReporter
You're a gay fish.
No I'm naahhhh!!!
I'm a motherliness lyrical wordsmith motherliness genius!
CMCarlos Mencia
[tied up at Kanye West's mansion] Okay, look, it wasn't me! I didn't really start the fishstick thing, all right?
You're just sayin' that now 'cause you're scared.
CMCarlos Mencia
No, man, it's true! I stole it, man! I took credit for it 'cause I'm not actually funny! Come on, man, do you know what it's like? Being a comedian but not being funny? Come on, Kanye, I just take jokes and repackage them with a Mexican accent, man!
Think you can make fun of me? I'm a genius! I'm the voice of a generation! What are you?
CMCarlos Mencia
Nothing! Look at me, man! I'm not funny, I steal jokes, my dick don't work, man. I got to piss in a plastic bag, man, I got no dick!
Yeah, and if I had wheels I'd be a wagon.
[Kanye comes into the room with Cartman and Jimmy and his goons begin smashing everything]
Dude, it's Puff Daddy!
[speaking on David Letterman about the fishsticks joke] Yo, that is messed up, yo. I am not gay, and I sure as hell ain't no fish, all right?!
DLDavid Letterman
You...really don't get it?
Hey, yo man, I'm the most talented musician in the world! If I was a homosexual or a fish, I would know!
DLDavid Letterman
You're a rapper.
Yes.
DLDavid Letterman
An entrepreneur.
Yes.
DLDavid Letterman
And you like fishsticks.
Yes.
DLDavid Letterman
You're a gay fish.
[agitated] No, I am not no gay fish!
DLDavid Letterman
Just gay?
I am not gay, and I'm not a fish! Man!
DLDavid Letterman
You are male.
Damn right, I'm male!
DLDavid Letterman
A male that likes fishsticks.
Yeah, I like fishsticks.
DLDavid Letterman
You like to put fishsticks in your mouth.
Yeah.
DLDavid Letterman
You're a gay fish. Also, I'm not gay.
All right, that does it! I'm gonna kick your motherliness ass! [attacks Letterman]
These quotes come from Wikiquote's South Park pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.