Carrie Bradshaw quotes from Sex and the City

Charlotte

Doesn't that waiter look familiar?

Samantha

I fucked him.

Carrie

[sarcastically] Oh! That guy!

Samantha

[looking at her appointment book] Shit, motherfucker, fuck, shit.

Miranda

There's a "Shit, motherfucker, fuck, shit" situation?

Samantha

I have to go to the theater!

Carrie

They finally made that mandatory?

Samantha

A new play in Brooklyn. Jerry's in it.

Miranda

So it's children's theater?

Charlotte

Oh, I think that's sweet.

Samantha

It's not sweet, it's pathetic how far a gal will go for a good fuck.

Big

[on the phone] So how's it going with that guy, Hot Dog?

Carrie

Berger.

All we're saying is there really is no good way to break up with someone, is there?

Carrie

Well, it's funny you should mention that, Billy, because actually, there is. You can have the guts and the courtesy to tell a woman, to her face, that you no longer wanna see her. Call me crazy, but I think that you can make a point of ending your relationship in a manner that does not include an e-mail, a doorman, or a missing persons report. I think you could all get over your fear of looking like the bad guy and actually have the uncomfortable break-up conversation, because here's what: Avoiding that is what makes you the bad guy! And just so you know, Alan—

Andrew.

Carrie

Uh-huh. Most women aren't angry, irrational psychos. We just want an ending to a relationship that... that is thoughtful and decent and honors what we had together. So my point, Billy, is this: There is a good way to break up with someone, and it doesn't include a Post-it!

Carrie

I tried the trapeze yesterday for that piece that I'm writing.

Charlotte

I could never! I have the most terrible fear of heights.

Carrie

Well, I do not. You've seen my shoes.

Charlotte

[about Carrie's high-school sweetheart] You're marrying him!

Carrie

Will you stop? He doesn't even live in New York, he lives in Denver.

Charlotte

People move! It would be so romantic.

Carrie

Or tragic. Seriously. If I had the guy in high school, what have I been doing for the past twenty years?

Charlotte

Big is in town?

Carrie

Yeah, he's here for a little heart thing.

Miranda

What, is he on the wait list to get one?

Samantha

He did something to me that was so perverse! Okay, I'm just gonna say it: He tried to hold my hand.

Carrie

You mean to tell me that Smith is a hand-holder? And to think he once served us food.

Samantha

You laugh, but it's part of a bigger problem. Do you know that I didn't fuck a single or a married guy the whole time Smith was out of town?

You don't think it's significant?

Carrie

Oh, please! There are depressed women all over New York doing the exact same thing as her and not calling it art. I mean, if you put a phone up on that platform, it's just a typical Friday night waiting for some guy to call.

Carrie

[about Aleksandr] Yesterday I almost did it with him on a park bench in front of children.

Samantha

What stopped you?

Carrie

Common decency.

Samantha

Oh, that.

Charlotte

I could see it going somewhere.

Carrie

Oh, please, listen, half the time I can't even understand him. We have nothing in common. He's in and out of Europe...

Charlotte

That could be good!

Samantha

Honey, you're not listening. She only wants him to be in and out of her.

Carrie

Yes, but in a much less obvious-sounding way.

Charlotte

[to Samantha] I can't believe you would actually consider having a boob job.

Carrie

[to Samantha] I can't believe you went to Planet Hollywood.

Miranda

What I don't understand is, if they got it all, why do you need chemo?

Samantha

[about her doctor] Because he's an asshole.

Carrie

Evidently there can be something microscopic...

Samantha

Like his dick?

Carrie

Excuse me, do you have cancer or Tourette's?

Miranda

Why do I think living in Manhattan is so fantastic?

Carrie

Because it is.

Miranda

I don't talk to Steve about my work.

Carrie

And he doesn't mind?

Miranda

I think he prefers it that way.

Carrie

But you guys share everything else.

Miranda

Because we're in Brooklyn. There's no one else to talk to.