Urgh, God! What the hell is that? Urgh!
It's just a special kind of kiss. A French kiss, that's all.
I'm never going to France if they do that there! What the hell is wrong with him, is he a vampire?
TV show quotes
Urgh, God! What the hell is that? Urgh!
It's just a special kind of kiss. A French kiss, that's all.
I'm never going to France if they do that there! What the hell is wrong with him, is he a vampire?
Is this fruit bread mouldy?
That's not even fruit bread. Bung it in the compost.
It's just an essay. It's easy.
Well, what's it about?
The Romantic poets.
Why's that easy?
'Cos there's just not much to say.
(reads) "The Romantic poets were a bunch of emos."
We could do you a whole new make-over! That would be a good mother-daughter thing.
But I don't want a make-over! I'm perfectly happy with the way I look.
Well, you're just being silly now.
[On the FIFA video game series] On Playstation you only get to control one player at a time, while the others all charge about randomly like...England.
So Ottfried, what other British TV do you like?
Well, I like Ricky Gervais, and I like...this other comedian. He plays a character, a very funny character, a fat politician, and he has funny blonde hair, he sometimes cycles, I see him on a bike, sometimes, on the television.
Do you mean Boris Johnson?
Yes, Boris Johnson, he's so funny. You like him also?
No, Ottfried, he's the mayor of London.
Yes, he plays the mayor of London, a very stupid politician, very funny...
[Traffic jam]
What's happening?
Just two Father Christmases trying to beat the crap out of each other.
Shall I tell you something, Karen? I'd ban Roald Dahl. He's probably ruined more children's lives than polio. Ruined them with the ludicrous belief that all adults are stupid and can routinely be outwitted by small children and the occasional fox.
Now, if you like reading, I recommend this.
"Lord of the Flies".
Yup. That's what really happens when children get to make the rules: corpses everywhere.
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