Imagine Alan in high school. Hanging out by the bike rags, snapping towels in the shower.
Thanks for the shower image.
S5 E13Trouble in Chinatown
S5 E14Sneakerhead
Is this going to get us anywhere, or are we just digressing?
When do I ever digress?
[after David opened a secret vault] How'd you do that?
I work for Batman.
[about the thiefs] Let me get this straight. They passed up paintings and diamonds for...
Sneakers!?
[after David opened a secret vault] How'd you do that?
It worked for Batman.
S5 E15Guilt Trip
I seem like a roast beef kind of guy to you?
I won't discuss another man's meat.
Listen, when you're done with that, would you mind looking at something for me?
Yeah, sure, what is it?
My profile. I'm joining Facebook... Well, I figured, since I'm back in college I might as well hook up with some old friends, maybe even find some new ones. People with similar interests as mine.
Intrests in what? High School Musical?
S5 E16Cover Me
Look at you, back in Narc training you didn't even drink and now you're the drug prince of L.A.!
CCam
Why do you think we never hooked up back then?
I d... you were married!
[about the way David is handling Liz] You better hope you don't have a daughter.
What are you talking about?
Imagine how you're gonna be, when she turns sixteen!
S5 E17First Law
CCoach
[about the "Granny shot" being more effective than the overhead shot] But there's something about that shot... it... it just doesn't look right.
Well Coach, that's the whole point of this thing. I mean, if we're gonna end CalSci's 15 year losing streak, we gotta find the best shot, not the shot that looks right.
JKJane Karellen
"You weaponized my telescope!", I hope that's not a Fleinhardt metaphor.
S5 E1812:01 AM
JCJohn Curtis
[about his last meal] There's no ketchup! They always forget the ketchup.
BPBasketball Player
[after Charlie holds his motivational speech] Coach, what the hell are you talking about?
[after the referee kicks him out] What did I say? All I did was calling him a black hole!
[realizing the unintended pun] You called him a black hole?
S5 E19Animal Rites
[about two usernames never being online at the same time] It's like Superman and Clark Kent, never at the same place at the same time.
The same person.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Numb3rs pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.