I've got to ask you this: did you order a dead body?
ULUSN Lt. Deckard
No, we did not.
S6 E8Cloak
What is this place?
ULUSN Lt. Deckard
It's classified.
Classified? What have you got in there? Aliens? Bigfoot? Ark of the Covenant? That only leaves one thing.
ZMZiva and McGee
[in unison] Unicorn!
ULUSN Lt. Deckard
What is your clearance?
About six-foot one-and-a-half. Why, have you got low ceilings? [shoots a picture of the guard]
ULUSN Lt. Deckard
[unimpressed by Tony's stalling tactics] Just get him out of here now, would you?
[passes by] Can't. Protocol.
Gotta wait for the medical examiner to release him.
[Ducky and Palmer's truck arrives at the scene.]
And there he is.
ULUSN Lt. Deckard
How many trucks you guys got?
Well, you've already met Widow Woman and Spider Mike here. [indicating Ziva and McGee] The Rubber Ducky makes it a great big convoy. (after a pause) See what I did there? Seamless transition from Convoy to Smokey and the Bandit.
S6 E9Dagger
[getting navigation set up for Tony and Ziva to go after a lead] There is a built in compass so you don't get lost.
Don't worry, McScout. We've got our Mossad hunting dog. Bark once for yes.
[growls]
[McGee is on the phone with Tony, concerned he's lost their signal]
Define 'lost', McGee. I know exactly where we are. We're between a tree and a bush, directly underneath the earth's sun.
Well you're not showing up on the map, let me restart the scan.
You might wanna hurry. Ziva's turning in circles; either the trail's gone cold, or she's about to mark her territory.
I smell a non-fat soy double-cross latte.
McGPS, are we close to anything?
How can you work with someone for three years and not know they have a kid?
Just because you work with somebody everyday does not mean that you know *everything* about them.
Really? So I shouldn't know about that tattoo on the inside of your...
I MEANT, I understand someone wanting to keep their personal and professional lives seperate, as should you. It did not end very well, when you fell in love when you were undercover, did it?
...Thanks for the memory.
[putting an ear wig on Lee] You've pled your case with everyone else, why not me?
LLee
I'm done trying to explain. No one understands.
I do.
LLee
...You would do what I did?
[Reffering to her ear piece] That too tight?
LLee
It's fine. Thank you... I'm never going to see my daughter again, am I?
Probabaly not.
Red apples. That's good Amanda.
Breakfast is served, my lady a chocolate chip cookie [Amanda saying Thank you] and some hot cocoa.
Your aunt will be here soon to pick you up.
AAmanda
Thank you for helping me with my drawing, Ziva.
You are one brave little girl Amanda.
AAmanda
Where's Mi - Shi? [walking over to window] What happened to your hand?
[Gibbs hands Agent Lee's badge to Amanda] Mi-Shi would want you to have that.
S6 E10Road Kill
[Tony has taken his picture on his computer]
I'm not even going to ask.
Allow me. [To Tony] What are you doing, Tony?
Best deep in thought face.
I guess there's a first time for everything.
[As the computer displays his picture] Nailed it. All right, Strawdog24. Beat this one. [Puts it on the webpage] Yeah, baby.
[Reading the website name] Ibeatyou.com. The place to compete online with anyone at anything.
Yeah. It's very fun. Very addictive. Look at this guy. Best air guitar. Look at that guy. Best "do the Hustle." [McGee walks back to his desk] I mean, you name it, they got it.
The Hustle?
The Hustle. Saturday Night Fever? Travolta. [Mimics dancing in his chair]
[Laughs sarcastically] What is the point?
What is the point of any dance? It's about letting loose. It's, you know, having a good time.
I meant the web site, Tony.
It's... fun. It is... amusement. Light-hearted pleasure.
I know what you're doing. I know how to have fun, Tony.
Really? Do tell.
The Hustling and the deep thinking photos. Those are all just, you know. Child's play. Tell him, McGee. [Tony looks over in McGee's direction, as does Ziva. Both look at him oddly] McGee?
[Cut to McGee making a contorted face]
[on the same web site] Uh, I'm just working on my best psycho face here.
It's not bad, Probie. Just need to work a little bit more with the eyebrow. See what I'm saying? [Holds his hand in front of McGee as he continues making the contorted look] See how that reads? See that?
[With contorted face] Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
That's what you want.
Would you two like some time alone together?
MOMan on Ship
You the Navy Cops?
Yeah, my seahorse is double-parked outside. You ought to see the lights.
I remember my first fight. I was eight. Shemer Rubenstein.
Sounds like a real stud.
One punch and it was over.
What did Shemer Rubenstein do to deserve the wrath of Ziva?
He said he liked me.
Look, everybody enjoys a good book, but don't you ever have the urge to just act a little...
Childish?
Silly. Stupid. Brainless.
Like you?
Exactly.
Tony, you and I come from two totally different places. In my world, you grow up. Fast. You have no choice.
Now you do.
Way to go McGee. Taking down the Fight Club champ. I'm almost impressed.
Well, I would be to, except he fell over and hit his head while he was trying to get away.
S6 E11Silent Night
Something wrong, Jethro?
Fingerprints found at a double homicide yesterday belong to a Petty Officer who's supposed to have been dead seventeen years. [hands Ducky a file] His death certificate.
Oh, dear. [chuckles] Someone's in trouble. [looks at the certificate] I signed it?!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's NCIS pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.