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S6

Mystery Science Theater 3000 · Season 6

Joe, Mike [as Joe] and others in “The Skydivers”

[In voiceover, industrial arts nerd Joe talks about his beloved craft.]

And you know, I like the feel of a board moving smoothly against a sharp saw.

MAMike [as Joe]

[luridly] ...then I thrust the nail into the soft, yielding wood...

I like the smell of fresh wood chips and sawdust...

SAServo [as Joe]

[nervously] I put them in my underwear!

...the bright glare of a welder...

CACrow [as Joe]

[wobbily] I like to sneak in and lay on the table saw!

SAServo [as Joe]

Yes!

...the sharp whine of the power tools…

MAMike [as Joe]

...the piercing scream of a freshman…

...or the dull tap-tap of tools on leather.

CACrow [as Joe]

[wobbily] Tap ta-tap-tap... I keep Popular Mechanics under my mattress!

The feeling of chaps with no pants!

...A wrench...

Let it go, man! Shop class was a long time ago! It's OVER!

...A plane...

CACrow [as Joe]

[haltingly] These tools are my friends!

...or a chisel...

What about girls young man? Girls?

No, no, chisels!

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