“Ida loses a Leg” quotes from Malcolm in the Middle

Dewey

[on the phone] Hello, Pathology? Yes, this is Judy Green from Dr. Weiss' office. I'm calling about the chop-and-drop he did Thursday on the old lady... Listen, Dr. Weiss thinks he may have left his wedding ring in that leg... He was pretty hammered... Yeah, again. So anyway, we need to get that leg out of there before the lawyers come around and do their Monday-morning quarterbacking. You know what instead of the usual place, why not send it to my house. I'll give you the address.

Lois

[bringing Francis back when he tries to leave] Get back in here, we are not having this argument again.

Ida

Let him go. [about Dewey] It's the little one who owes me his life.

Francis

See? Even she thinks so.

Lois

Francis, everyone else in this family either has school or a job. So you're staying here and helping your grandmother.

Ida

I DON'T NEED HELP!!! Look at him, he's got nothing in between his legs and he manages.

Francis

If you think I'm beyond punching you, you're totally wrong.

Ida

Of course you'd hit a cripple. You couldn't get a white girl to marry you.

Francis

I don't care if you knew the end of that Star Trek episode. I didn't and you ruined it. You can't let anyone be happy!

Ida

Shut up, Monkey! Anyone with half-a-brain could see the rocks were alive!!!