Parker quotes from Leverage

I know that you're in charge of the bridesmaid dresses, but why are you wearing one?

Parker

A bridesmaid dress is like an all-access pass at a wedding. Plus, I kind of said something and the maid of honor cried, and Sophie said I should make it up to her.

Looking much, much better in the same dress? Yeah, you let me know how that goes.

Parker

You really think I look good?

[After setting the corsage] And now you're perfect.

Eliot

What is it? I've got bacon on.

Parker

The butcher is here.

Eliot

Does he have the baby lamb chops?

No, the Butcher of Kiev.

Think he'll recognize you?

I kill you!

Eliot

Yeah, I think he'd remember me.

Parker

Go.

Eliot

These peaches aren't gonna poach themselves, Parker.

Parker

Sorry, Emeril.

Eliot

What was that?

Parker

You heard me.

Eliot

Yeah. I'll show you. Bam!

It's about time. How did you get away from Sergei in the screening room?

Parker

I pretended I was drunk and that we were meeting down there to have sex.

Eliot

I hate to say it, but you know who we could really use--

Don't even say his name. I don't want it spoken aloud.

Parker

Target's on the 30th floor. You don't really expect us to--

Eliot

Great. Another key card.

Parker

I'm gonna kill him.

Not if I get to him first

These people killed a kid, all right? They killed a bunch of kids. There's no way in hell we're gonna let them get away with it. We are going to get on that flight.

Eliot

All right.

Parker

So, what are we waiting for?

Eliot

How does she do this?

I don't even ask anymore.

Who are you? Where's Becky?

Parker

She got promoted. Did you not get the email?

She got promoted? She only started a few months ago.

Parker

She must really know how to pick 'em. A few more lay overs, and she'll be piloting one of these things, huh?

So we should focus on carry-on. No one checks bags full of cash.

Parker

Might not be cash.

Eliot

What's it gonna be, Parker? Gold bars? They don't exactly travel well.

No, Parker's right. We could be looking at traveler's checks or bearer bonds...anything that packs light.

Could I have a ginger ale please?

Parker

You've already had two.

Yeah, I know. It's like a placebo effect. It's not really working, but it makes you feel better anyway.

Parker

Yeah? So, when's that supposed to kick in?

Parker

Hatbox full of Euros, pouch of uncut diamonds, and a stolen Stradivarius. Now, I’ve never lifted one of those.

Parker...

Sophie

This is insane. Between the four of us, we've found millions of dollars of merchandise. None of it belongs to Genogrow.

Cayman islands--thieves' holiday.

Sophie

I think we should tell her.

Parker

No way. That woman's already paranoid-crazy. We tell her there's a bounty on her head, and she's gonna lose it.

Sophie

I think she has a right to know. Anyway, if Haldeman’s going to this much trouble, then she must have something, some information that could help us help our client. She's our smoking gun.

Okay. Tell her.

Parker

Don't say I didn't warn you.

Parker, the device you found--is it anywhere near an orange box?

Parker

Yeah.

Oh, god. They tapped into the black box.

Parker

No, no, it's not black. It's orange.

Yeah, the black boxes, they're orange. Makes them easier to find in the debris.

Parker

Oh. Oh...

Hardison, we need you!

I don't--I--I don't know, Nate. I don't--I mean...I--I can override the software attack, but that means we would have to restart the flight's electrical system, which I have no idea how to do, because my knowledge of aeronautical engineering... is kind of limited to what I can pull off of Google in the next two minutes. And, brother, I don't--I mean--

Listen to me! You can do this! I trust you! No matter how many times you goof off or screw up, you always come through in the clutch. You're the only guy I can count on in a situation like this.

You know what? I--I--you...you're right. You're right. I got this.

Yes! Yes! Yes, you can!

You're right. You're-- I'm the man. I'm the man. I got this. I'm gonna do this.

Parker

Then do it already!

Eliot

Where the hell is he at?

Maybe he overslept.

Eliot

No. He doesn't oversleep. This guy sets an alarm to set his alarm.

Parker

"A man with one watch knows the time. A man with two is never sure."

Sophie

Huh?

Parker

I had fortune cookies for breakfast.

Okay, run it.

So, what, you had left-over Chinese for breakfast?

Parker

No, just the cookies.

Do you put milk on the fortune cookies? ‘Cause I don’t...

Parker

It's not cereal. It's a fortune cookie. You don't dunk it.

Okay, Parker. Go.

Parker? Parker? Parker?

Parker

Hmm?

What are you doing?

Parker

Oh, yeah. [sounding bored] Help. Help. [to man on the lift] How you doin’?

Oh, geez.