She was molested, you know that. That cold facade of hers?
Maybe it's just living in Colorado.
She dresses more Fifth Avenue than Rocky Mountain.
I'm...having a fashion police blackout.
All S1
S1 E15Unfinished Business
[as Stabler and Benson approach Vanessa's apartment, after Benson knocks, out come Detectives Lennie Briscoe and Ed Green]
Hey! Lennie Briscoe, what the hell you doin' here?
We heard there was good dim sum down here. Say hi to my partner, Eddie Green.
[Briscoe and Green enter the SVU squad room.]
Hey, Lennie.
It's like a nightmare.
You are looking at the fruits of 4 hours of dumpster diving along 59th Street. 9 dumpsters in all.
You trying to tell me the 2 of you went dumpster diving?
Hell, no. We supervised a couple of uniforms. I don't do disposable diapers.
KKen
Hey. Uncle Lennie.
[shakes hands with his nephew] Ken, good to see you. Say hi to Eddie Green.
[shakes hands with Ken] Hey.
Listen, uh, cool it with the Uncle Lennie stuff around the station house. Okay?
KKen
Yeah, so, what do you want me to call you?
Why don't you guys save this for family court?
Well, just call me Briscoe.
KKen
Well, what are you gonna call me?
Briscoe.
[testifying against a doctor] Miss Webber was told to disrobe, put her feet up in stirrups, and try to picture David Hasselhoff on "Baywatch."
DADefense Attorney
Objection! Your Honor, this witness is not qualified to testify on the treatment for hysteria.
Actually, sir, I am. Up until 1952, hysteria was one of the most commonly diagnosed illnesses among women. The medical treatment was hysterical paroxysm.
CRCourt Reporter
Could the witness spell that?
O-R-G-A-S-M.
DADefense Attorney
Objection! Would it surprise you to learn that, historically, the onus fell upon physicians to bring about relief of these ladies' symptoms?
AADA
Your Honor, please instruct counsel to withhold his questions until cross.
[to the judge] I don't mind, Your Honor. [to ADA] In fact, I believe the manual version of this treatment dates back to Hippocrates, and was attested to right up through the Middle Ages, up into the 1890s, when the vibrator was invented to speed things along.
ADADA and Defense Attorney
Objection!
I'd never let my daughters go out dressed like that.
Yeah, right. Just wait.
What does that mean?
Jerkwad, have some respect for the victim.
Hey, I respect hookers. At least they earn their money up front, unlike ex-wives, who get you with that lucrative back-end deal.
Oh, so you're saying all women are whores?
Don't be ridiculous. I don't know all the women in the world.
Children!
When you were at the 3-1, did you know a cop named Sal D'Angelo?
The 70s are a blur.
Tell me about it. Closest I ever came to time travel.
D'Angelo's a bastard. C'mon. So are you. So am I. We're all bastards.
[After reading aloud an excerpt from a travel book written by the victim.]
His wanderlust is one adverb short of Robert James Waller.
"The Bridges of Madison County."
That was incredible.
How about incredibly banal? Short and muscular sentences displaying total absence of original thinking.
I was talking about the movie.
Unnerving, isn't it? That such a degrading death could overshadow such a remarkable life?
It's like Rockefeller dying on top of his mistress.
It's still my preferred way to go.
Virginia, Detectives Munch and Cassidy are going to take you home.
VVirginia
[to Munch] Can I drive?
Since you're probably as old as my partner, I don't see why not.
Drama's a major food group for teenage girls.
It's true a good Mrs. Robinson's hard to find, but women maturing faster than men? Conspiracy. The government's been covering up the harmful side-effects of RBGH, a hormone that farmers are using to produce more milk.
Like McGwire taking Creatine to bulk up, right?
The farmers don't take the hormones, Cassidy. The cows do.
So is there anything you just...accept?
Yeah. Compliments.
No wonder you're so skeptical.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Law & Order: Special Victims Unit pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.