Squiggy Squiggman quotes from Laverne & Shirley

What I don't have in strength, I make up for in what I lack up here! [Points to head]

Ooh, the swimsuit competition! I'm gonna turn down the sound so we can see it better!

Alright, so maybe we are pickleheads! BUT WE'RE THE BEST DAMN PICKLEHEADS IN THE STATE OF MILWAUKEE!

[To his date] Keep drinking, it'll make it easier...

[To Monique] Go out with me, and thou gets toast!

If that ain’t the whole truth… then may Edna’s coffee be poisoned!

Champagne? Why that’s the devil’s vodka!

Of course, a silent movie! That’s why we’s never heard of them!

Shirley

No, thank you. We're going to a formal society dinner.

Lenny

[Sarcastically] Whoa, pardon me ladies...

Yeah, I would've worn my tuxedo, but my polo pony ate it.

Laverne

Shirl, believe me, I'm not sick, and there's nothing in this place that will make me sick.

Hello!

Shirley

It's different for you. You don't have a reputation to protect.

What are you talking about, Shirley? For the first time in my life, I got a reputation!

Oh my God, she's cooking herself to death!

Lenny

Hey don't kill yourself Shirl, They'll be other fires!

[In unison] Fire, fire, fire, someone get the net! Here come the firemen, to get the fire wet! SHHH goes the hose and DING goes the bell....

(Calling from the dumbwaiter) Laverne, Shirley!

What?

Come on up here, Lenny just swallowed his comb!

OK!

Laverne

Squiggy, Come over here and grab his tongue!

What are you doing? He didn't swallow no comb! That was a gimmick to get you up here! Sheesh!

Laverne

A gimmick? [Laverne and Shirley dropped Lenny down as she talked to Squiggy] What was the big deal here? Uh choking on a comb? How you like to choke on one my curlers!

Shirley

Charles Pfister Krane has a reputation!

So does my sister.