Squiggy Squiggman quotes from Laverne & Shirley

[To Shirley] What do you say we go to the drive-in, and you let me run amuck?

You people make me stink!

Lenny and I have two very respectful women upstairs, and we'd like to settle down to a nice, quiet orgy.

Stop it, I'm going to lose my lust!

[To Lenny] What are you doing?!? When I'm talking to girls, don't stick your fingers in your mouth!

[To Shirley, after seeing her stuffed chest] Look at you! You're all... swelled up! What do you, got the mumps?

Oh, look at that wine! It's white, just like Barbara...

Here, why don't you just suck on a wing, huh?

Lenny and me is working on the world's first combination electric toothbrush and radio. We call it the radio-brush. You'll be able to dance away your tooth decay!

Go ahead and laugh. Just like they laughed at Columbus right before he discovered Ohio.

We woulda been here on time, but we was late.

This song is called "Night After Night," and it's about two nights in a row.

He loved those baby teeth! As if they was his own!

You wash your feet in the living room too?!?!!

[Telling Laverne, Shirley, Frank and Carmine] You're right! I ain't gonna pass that test. And you know why? I'll tell you why, Because my driving carrier is over I AM FINISHED! [Leaving Laverne & Shirley's apartment] I'm not gonna pass it for one simple reason! Because I'm JUST...TOO...DUMB! [Slams the door]