To be honest, I think you look like mutton dressed as lamb.
Well, thank you for noticing Sharon!
All S1
S1 E15Unfinished Business
I told King Henry VIII to get knotted. Me and Kel are happy to do it on the front lawn!
Sharon! Treat em' mean, keep them keen!
Well? wouldn't... being nicer be the better way to go?
It’s a poem.
This’ll be good!
*Reads poem from Brett to Kim* Dear Kim, I think about you all the time, I am missing you all the time, you are a hornbag, I’m a fool, if you come back I’ll put in a heated spa.
It doesn’t even rhyme!
(Talking to Kim about online dating) Why don't you try logging on to WWW dot bretty dot com - hey you, come here! (grabs Kim)
Piss off, Brett!
No kiss, no coach, no kiss, no coach, it was like a nightmare!
Why didn't you just kiss him?
I really want something elegant, you know. Something, I dont know, maybe a cocktail party. You know, with some hot suggestions.
Yeah, yeah, yeah! We can have those classy cocktails. I've had them all, Sixtey-Niner, Slow Screw Against The Wall, Sex On The Beach.
Yeah? What about an "orgasm"?
No, I've never had one of those.
Look at me, Mum, don't you think I look like Britney Spears?
Yes, you do, you do, you look like her sister, Asparagus. Asparagus Spears, geddit?
I've still got a thumping headache. I'm never drinking again.
More Bailey's, Kim?
Yes, thanks.
When is the wedding?
It's September 18th, 4:45 for a 4:46 start.
And where will the wedding be held? Hyatt? Sheraton? Crown Towers?
No, it's a garden wedding.
Oh beyoushiful, a marquee at the Royal Botanical Garden!
Erm, no, a tarpaulin over the clothesline at White Horse Court, Fountain Lakes.
Graysh!
PPrue
How about something in your Bodum?
I beg yours!
PPrue
A plunger in your Bodum's always nice. And it comes with these matching cups which are cyuuute.
Nuh.
PPrue
How about Nigella Oliver's newie? It's the box set! It's got New Food, Screwed Food, Rude Food and Nude Food...
Nuh.
Do you have flutes in your Orrefors? (pronounced like orifice)
Yes! I do.
Right, I'll take two of those.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Kath & Kim pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.