Cancer Cowboy quotes from JPod

Our family is a disaster.

... that was the worst Christmas ever...

Ethan

Hi, I'm Ethan Jarlewski. I work here in the jPod as the Gore Specialist. Basically I find new ways of inserting carnage and violence in video games while conforming to quality codes.

Dude that's so boring. Talk about your love life.

Ethan

I'm not talking about my love life. My favourite room temperature is... This is pretty good. Cowboy where are we at now?

21.7 degrees Celsius.

Ethan

Make that 71 degrees Fahrenheit. I hate metric. I don't want to talk about it.

Talk about your love life.

Ethan

Okay, my love life. I've had my heart broken twice and lately I've been wondering if there is even such a thing as "The One" and that scares me. And that's enough of that. Happy, Cowboy! (gets up). So yeah Steve I'm here to serve your vision. We here at Jpod are a go get and bunch.

Alright, Steven Lefkowitz. Dude, check this out, this guys a hugger!

John Doe

What?

Look at this, he's on the board of a cuddling club.

John Doe

Man, that is sick!

I thought I recognized him...

John Doe

What do you mean you recognized him?

I ju-just knew I'd seen before...

Ethan

Crotches and hot coffee only mean one thing to me. Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas. Ho's, blow and insane stunt bonuses.

Hot coffee

Ethan

Hot coffee

What are you guys talking about?

Kaitlin, hot coffee is a euphemism for sex. It was a secret mini-game coded into the video game. Players with the right downloaded mod could have up to six girlfriend and basically plow the daylights out of them between crime sprees. And yes, fellatio was involved.