My brothers and I are leaving on a six-month loot and pillage of England, and we're looking for a ship with a savage countenance.
Well, Boney, you've come to the right place! I've just the thing - one of our big, BIG sellers! On sale today only, we call it the terrifying King of the Jungle! [reveals a ship with a kitten figurehead]
It's a kitty!
No, it's a ferocious jungle cat! ROARR!
It's a kitty! I can't invade England with a kitty on the front of my boat!
Are you kidding? This thing will strike terror in their souls! It will send people running!
Only if they're allergic to kitties. I need something fierce!
He's fierce!
He's smiling!
No he's not!
That's one of those inscrutible little kitty smiles!
No, he's thinking!
[sarcastically] Oh, thinking! Great! "Here come the Vikings, they're going to think us to death! Oh, my brain's filled with thoughts! Run for your lives!"
Now now, Boneless baby, look at those eyes! They say, "I'm angry!" They say, "I'm dangerous!" They say--
They say, "Meow," he's a happy little kitten!
I happen to know he's not the least bit happy. He's actually rather sad.
Oh, even better! "Run everyone! Here come the Sad Kitty Vikings! Look out or we'll depress you! Ooooh!"
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