Alphonse quotes from Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood

Dr. Knox

I... She's not in any real danger. She'll have to stay in bed for a few days.

Alphonse

I'm relieved

Dr. Knox

Increasing my number of patients on a whim like that! Where I am going to sleep!? Tell me that!

Alphonse

I'm sorry!

Alphonse

Hey! Just hold on a minute! I don't know what this is about, but you can't fight like thi—!

QUIT TRYING TO INTERFERE WITH THE AFFAIRS OF OUR COUNTRY!

Alphonse

WAH! [falls on his back in surprise]

Lan Fan

My wounds aren't going to slow me down.

May

Is that so? Well, neither will mine!

Dr. Knox

WHAT THE HELL DO YOU TWO THINK YOU'RE DOING?! [slams a bowl of food and a washbasin on each of May and Lan Fan's heads] You're supposed to be resting in bed!

May

[clutching her head pitifully] Quit trying to interfere with the affairs of our countr—!

Dr. Knox

I DON'T CARE ABOUT THE AFFAIRS OF YOUR COUNTRY, DUMBASS! Geez... it doesn't matter where you're from, you're both my patients.

Dr. Knox

You're not planning on making an even larger mess around here, are you? Huh? 'Cuz if you do, you might release an unknown pathogen from the floorboards... and kill everyone in the house.

May

Umm... Mister Armor? Thank you so much... for saving us.

Alphonse

My name's Alphonse. Alphonse Elric.

May

Elric?

Alphonse

You know Edward Elric, right? The short Alchemist you were yelling at before. I'm his little brother. You already know since you were inside, but I don't have a body. Keep it a secret, ok?

May

If you're his brother, does that mean you have the same angry look.

Alphonse

NO WAY! For starters, I'm way taller than him, better looking, and fight better than him! Plus, I'm not short tempered at all! I'm a perfect gentleman!

May

Alphonse, I hope you get your body back really soon!

Alphonse

Uh, why, thank you...

Speaking of. You owe me money. How 'bout you cough it up?

Edward

Eyes on the road! [The car goes wild] You remembered!? C'mon, how much did I borrow, 500 Cenz?

It was 520 Cenz! Don't con me!

Edward

I'm not conning you! I'm just not like a penny-pincher like you.

Alphonse

I'm sorry, Colonel.

Edward

At this rate, you'll never make it big. [looks down at the cents] Actually I am going to hang on to this. I will return it when you become the Führer.

Who told you?

Edward

Lieutenant Hawkeye. She told me about Ishval too. [arrives at destination]

Fullmetal, you can keep the change for now, but I'll be getting it back for sure.

Edward

And when that day comes, I'll borrow more money from you again, With the promise of, "I will pay you back when you turn this country into a democracy." And when you get that back, I'll borrow some money and make sure you agree to something else.

Which means I have a long life ahead of me, huh?

Edward

That'r right. Quit worrying the Lieutenant! [slams door] Thanks for the ride.

Selim

You really DO wear armor! Awesome!

Alphonse

Who is he?

Edward

A Homunculus! Damn, they know that we've come here to find a way to fight back against the homunculus?

Don't fall asleep!

Sloth

What?

Edward

Oh, you know, your "Father" in Central told you about us, right?

Alphonse

Yeah, we're just here looking for a way to get our old bodies back.

Sloth

Who are you? Dig the hole. What a bother. Ah, what a bother.

Edward

You don't think this guy...

Alphonse

Mm. He might not have heard about us from Father or the Fuhrer.

Buccaneer

So you really are a spy from Drachma!

You misunderstand!

Buccaneer

Then why are you speaking with the intruder like you know him?

Edward

We don't know him!

Buccaneer

Your lies won't fool me!

Edward

I'm not lying, I tell you! We were just...

Sloth

This place is big. Where is this? Do I not have to dig anymore?

Buccaneer

Fire! The guns have no effect!

Sloth

Where am I? [goes up the elevator]

Buccaneer

This is bad! He's going up to the development level! After him!

Contact the development level!

Edward

We're going after him, too!

Alphonse

Hm!

He's huge!

Sloth

It's warm...

Olivier

Don't move!

Olivier

Extinguish it.

Yes, sir!

Olivier

I know I hit it.

Buccaneer

Boss, it's no use! Firearms won't work against him!

Olivier

What?! All noncombatants, withdraw immediately. Shut off the alarm, too. Don't let the folks in Drachma know about this disturbance.

Boss, I brought these!

Olivier

Have the trial runs been completed?

We don't need them. These are the development team's prize babies.

Olivier

Remove the fuses from the shells.

Yes, ma'am.

First round loading complete.

Olivier

Fire!

Direct hit!

Sloth

Ouch. Pain is also...a bother...

Olivier

Don't just sit there, load the next round! Fire!

Sloth

Ouch. Right back to work...Dig the hole...

Olivier

Let me show you the Briggs way!

Edward

The Briggs way?

Buccaneer

That's right. Give me a hand, alchemist.

Alphonse

Brother!

Buccaneer

You, too!

Edward

Just a minute! We can't...

Buccaneer

You were forced to help us under threat. You've got no problem with that, right? Who's this?

Edward

Our good buddy.

Buccaneer

All right, help us out. Hurry! Don't spill any!

Buccaneer, Gate 8!

Buccaneer

Yes sir!

Olivier

Charge! Drive it into the elevator!

Sloth

What a bother...

Olivier

Push! Push us! All right, it's working! Rotate turret right!

Yes ma'am...

Olivier

Miles! Send it!

Miles

Yes, sir!

All right, it's gone!

Sloth

Where am I?

Buccaneer

Now! Do it!

Buccaneer

All right!

Alphonse

So? What next?

Edward

Outside the gate? Stinky.

Olivier

Move it, little red runt!

Olivier

Hey! One more shot!

We're out of ammo!

In that case...

Sloth

Ouch.

Edward

All right!

Buccaneer

That's cold weather climate blended fuel. It vaporizes regardless of the extreme cold, and its heat of evaporation saps body temperature in an instant. Plus, we've got the blizzard. That will freeze it instantly, right down to its brain.

Sloth

So...Cold...Body....won't....move..What..a..bother-

Winry

Let me out Al!

May

Excuse me! Who is this woman Al?!

Alphonse

No its not like that she's just a friend ! [Thought] Wait... why am I explaining this like I was cheating on her or something...

Zampano

We already got this under control, you just sit tight while we take care of Sca- [Gets punch by Alphonse and kicked by Edward]

AAH! TALKING MONSTERS!

Zampano

What's wrong with the two of you, were all on the same si- [Gets punch by Alphonse]

Alphonse

I'D NEVER TEAM UP WITH ANY FREAKY LOOKING MONSTERS!

Edward

Help us, they're pretending to be our friends so they could eat us!

Alphonse

The chubby one has an enormous mouth, he could eat you in a single bite!

May

Mr. Yoki?

Yoki

Help, get it off.

Envy

[latched on the back of Yoki's neck] Haha! I've hijacked this idiot's body!

Yoki

Aah! Stop it! Let go! Somebody help me! I can't control my body!

Envy

That's right, you can't! Now if you want him to live, you will do as I tell you!

Jerso

Nah, he's all yours. Do what you want.

Zampano

It's not like he's our friend or anything.

Yoki

Aah!

May

Poor Yoki, I'm sorry I didn't know you better.

Alphonse

We'll never forget your sacrifice!

Yoki

Aah! Please Mr. Scar! You won't stand back and let this thing kill me, right? [Scar turns away] How can you turn your back on me?!

Envy

What is this? Dosen't anyone care about this guy?!

Marcoh

You're wasting your time Envy. We've accepted the measures we'll have to take to defeated you. We'll destory both you and this man if you don't surrender!

Envy

[Reluctantly letting Yoki go] Dammit!

Alphonse

[grabbing Envy] Got it!

Yoki

I'm free?

Jerso

Nice acting, Doctor!

Marcoh

I'm afraid I'm not used to bluffing like that.

Yoki

Damn all of you! None of you guys are my friends! How could you?! You're dead to me!

Envy

[Later placed in a glass jaw] This sucks.

Zampano

Well, I think it's about time we asked you about your plans.

Envy

I don't talk.

Zampano

What was that?! Spit it out! You little worm!

Jerso

Go! Let him have it, Zampano!

Envy

After I tell you, you're just gonna kill me, aren't you? You expect me to talk, you fool?

Zampano

Say what?

Envy

Come to think of it, isn't the Fullmetal pipsqueak here?

Brother? He should be back at Briggs right now.

Envy

I heard he'd gone missing.

What? What are you talking about? Tell me!

Envy

Apparently, the mine shaft in Baschool caved in. I wonder if he's still alive.

Winry

That's not true...

Hohenheim

Wake up Alphonse!

Alphonse

Huh? Dad?

Hohenheim

Yo.

Alphonse

Um... If you're here, Dad, then is this Kanama?

Hohenheim

That's right.

Alphonse

How did...Where did I...? Oh right! Pride! Dad, the Homunculus Pride came inside my body....

Hohenheim

Mm-hmm. I heard all about it from Mr. Gorius here.

Darius

That's "Darius".

Alphonse

Rats. It was like he was interfering with my soul, and it felt icky.

Hohenheim

Those guys are almost like clones of a clone of me. As my son, it might be easy for them to interfere with your blood seal.

Alphonse

Old man Fu...

Would you see to caring for this man's wounds?

Hohenheim

What's the situation like over there?

Are you Edward's father?

Hohenheim

Yes, I am.

The shadow monster devoured the one named gluttony, and he's beyond our control. Greed and Edward are fighting him, but the situation is not good.

Alphonse

This is my fault. Everyone is in this mess because pride caught me.

The fires have created too many light sources, The same tricks won't work any longer.

Darius

This is bad. The way things are headed, the people in the slums are going to be caught in the middle of this.

Alphonse

Dad...you're a big-time alchemist, right?

Hohenheim

Yeah, I'm not half bad.

Alphonse

I have a favor to ask, and I'm counting on your skills.

Why won't you use the stone to get your original bodies back?

Alphonse

If I did that I couldn't save everyone.

It's in accordance with your ideals...in order to obtain something you give up something of equal value.

Alphonse

Tell me.... why do I have to choose?..... It isn't right... I have to choose between returning to our original bodies and saving everyone... but why can't we have our bodies back AND save everyone? It isn't fair.

Well... there is another option. And that is: youdon't get your bodies back and you don't save everyone.

You have done well, my faithful sacrifices.

Hohenheim

[eyes widening in shock] You mean you actually did it?

[now in a new body fashioned after a much younger Hohenheim] Yes. I have done what I set out to do: acquire God.

Edward

Acquire God?! That is impossible!

Hohenheim

Unfortunately, it is, given a great enough amount of energy.

Edward

Wait, what energy? [he gasps in a horrified realization] THE PHILOSOPHER'S STONE?!

Alphonse

It can't be! Does this mean everyone was turned into a Philosopher's Stone?

May

How many lives were sacrificed for this?

Roy

Amestris is a large country; at least fifty million people.

Alphonse

Brother!

Edward

Al! Go on ahead! He appears to want something with me.

Izumi

Al, let's go! Don't you let yourself get beaten, Ed!

Edward

Right!

I take it you're here to retrieve your brother. Just how to you plan on pulling an entire human out of here? What's your payment? Do you intend to offer your own body?

Edward

Yeah, I've got your payment right here, so go ahead and take it! This thing is my Portal of Truth. So I get to make the decision on how it's used. That right?

Hehehehe! It's come to that? Hehehehahaha! And you're sure about this? You do realize that you'll never be able to perform alchemy again without your portal.

Edward

I'm aware of that. This portal, I know it contains every secret alchemy has to offer. However, it's also led me astray. I saw the truth that lies within it. And I became convinced I could solve everything with alchemy, but I couldn't possibly have been more wrong. That was just arrogance.

You're willing to cast it aside? To lower yourself to a simple human?

Edward

What do you mean lower myself? That's the only thing I've ever been, just a simple human that couldn't save a little girl, not even with alchemy.

You sure you'll be okay without it? Think carefully now!

Izumi

Ed!

Roy

Fullmetal!

Hawkeye

Edward!

Hohenheim

Ed!

Edward Elric!

Ling

Ed!

May

Edward!

Lan Fan

Ed!

Winry

Ed!

Edward

Who even needs alchemy, when I've got them!

[Gasping in excitement as he and Ed's door fade] You've done it! That's the right answer! Good job! You beat me! Go ahead! Take him home! The back door's right over there! Goodbye, Edward Elric!

Edward

That was crazy, Al.

Alphonse

Haha, speak for yourself.

Edward

Now let's go home, together...