“Little Glop of Horrors” · Season 1
In this episode: Mrs. Cram (4), Fanboy (3), Kyle Bloodworth-Thomason (3), Super Chum (2), Lupe (1)
Hey Kyle, it's Pizza Day! Come play "pizza monkeys" with us!
[with disdain] You two are "pizza monkeys"? What do you do? Throw your...pooperoni?
[hysterical laughter] Pooperoni!
[sigh] I'm witty day after day, and this is what they laugh at?
[the boys are at their table, staring glumly at the glop in front of them]
How does she expect us to eat this? It's burning my eyes just to look at it!
You public school students are so soft. Why, at Milkweed Academy, I was once forced to consume a beaver stomach tartare in a swamp bilge ragout. This'll be like a spoonful of Turkish delight. [takes a spoonful, releasing a cloud of fart] Oh, my, I'm going to be unwell. [topples over]
I hear it coming up, but I don't see it going down! START SLURPING!!!! IT'LL MAKE YOU BIG AND STRONG!!!!! [lifts Fanboy and Chum Chum's table and then drops it to the ground]
[the students arrive with their empty trays]
Well, we're all done. Really enjoyed all of it: the scooping it up, the chewing, the swallowing. Mm-mmm!
Why's your milk carton vibrating?!
[Nervously] um... ...it's a milkshake?
OPEN IT!!!
Uuuuuhhhh.... [all the glop explodes from the carton]
Maybe we shouldn't have stuffed it all in one cartons.
Well, the rest of you can sit here and gawk at your goop. But I have on my possession, a very large compendium of spell and charms. [Kyle's necronomicon comes to life] Necronomicon, I need your help to make something disappear.
Ooh!
Thanks ever so for the nummy-nummies. Now, I'm off to do some light reading whilst thy digest.[Mrs. Cram swipes Kyle's necronomicon]
Gimme that! Doesn't feel light to me! [shakes Kyle's necronomicon]
No! No! Don't shake me! No, no!
[nervously] Careful, that's a very delicate volume.
Oh dear! I think I'm going to... [Mrs. Cram faces the necronomicon to Kyle which pukes on him, Kyle then walks back to the table, head covered in glop, angry, and holding his necromicon] oh... It feels that I have gone through my entire table of contents.
[jumps out of a pot] Knitting a sweater for the grandkid?
It's for my cat! She's 55 lbs. of love! So, D'you finished your glop? It'll make you BIG AND STRONG!!!!
That's what I wanted to talk about, Mrs. Cram. May I call you Cramella? [Mrs. Cram has a blank face] Crama-lama-ding-dong? Okay, not budging on the name. I'll cut to the cheese. We'd like to go. You'd Like us to stay here 'till our bones crumble to dust. I think there's a little ground, So, I Am Gonna write a number for how many minutes I think we should stay. Does it sound like something you'd be interested in? [hands Mrs. Cram the paper]
This isn't a number, it's a W.
You drive a hard bargain! OK, tell ya what, I'll cut my offer in half [tears the piece of paper in half] from a W to just a U.
That's a V.
[sighs] Look, if you're not even gonna negotiate!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Fanboy & Chum Chum pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
