SSam
Men only care about three things: food, sports, and sex. Dogs are more mysterious. If they ever invent a refrigerator with a wide-screen T.V and a vagina, we're all doomed.
“Just a Touch” · Season 10, Episode 19
In this episode: Abby Lockhart (2), Kerry Weaver (2), Sam (2), John Carter (1), Luka Kovač (1), Morris (1), Greg Pratt (1)
Where's Pratt?
With a patient. What do you need?
I need Pratt-- Hey, Sam, hold up. Where are you going?
SSam
I'm going to grab with Alex and his dad.
Did you assist Dr. Pratt in examining Campbell, the woman in Curtain 2?
SSam
Yeah.
Was there anything unusual about the exam?
SSam
I don't think so. Why?
He gave her a breast exam for back pain.
SSam
I don't know what her chief complaint was. I was on the phone with the blood bank and juggling five other patients.
Sounds like he TUBE'd her.
SSam
She wasn't intubated, Morris.
No, no, you know, TUBE? T-U-B-E: Totally Unnecessary Breast Exam.
SSam
You're such an ass.
What was that?
SSam
Sorry.
No, not you. [to Morris] Where did you hear that term?
I... I dunno. I didn't make it up.
Well, who did?
How's Kem? She must be getting big.
Very.
You should see Susan.
How's she doing?
Well, you know how some mothers talk to their unborn children? Susan threatened to pull hers out with her bare hands if it didn't hurry up.
How's the Psych rotation?
Kind of scary.
The patients?
No, me. I like it.
[after a female patient has complained about Pratt's breast exam] Did you T.U.B E. her, Pratt?
What?
That's what you call it, isn't it, when you wanna feel up a good-looking patient?
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