Sherlock Holmes quotes from Elementary

Sherlock Holmes

I could always use friends in medium places.

Det. Marcus Bell

Well, as long as it helps you.

Det. Marcus Bell

[about Mason] Is anything this kid's doing legal?

Sherlock Holmes

Define legal.

You have good manners. You must work hard at them.

Sherlock Holmes

Well, I can be quite rude at times. When I fail to make the effort.

I forget sometimes, too.

Sherlock Holmes

How can I be of service?

We want to pull off a heist.

Sherlock Holmes

A heist?....You want to steal something from a heavily armed meth-dealing band of bike-riding satanists.

Interested?

Sherlock Holmes

Practically engorged. When do we start?

Dr. Joan Watson

You know you could have told me that you like her.

Sherlock Holmes

Beg your pardon?

Dr. Joan Watson

You like her.

Sherlock Holmes

Yes, I like Fiona. She's compulsively honest and congenitally unpretentious.

Dr. Joan Watson

And pretty.

Sherlock Holmes

What are you getting at?

Dr. Joan Watson

You like her as in LIKE like.

Sherlock Holmes

You're suggesting a romantic interest. More specifically you're suggesting a romantic interest in the vernacular of a prepubescent child.

Dr. Joan Watson

This is the book you loaned her. She wanted me to give it back to you.

Sherlock Holmes

So...?

Dr. Joan Watson

So... Hundreds of books in the house. How many volumes of poetry? Zero. You bought it for her.

Sherlock Holmes

Bought it to lend it.

Dr. Joan Watson

You like someone, that's amazing!

Sherlock Holmes

I like many women, often two at a time, you know that.

Dr. Joan Watson

No, this is not about sex. You really like her.

Sherlock Holmes

Stop using that word!

I've had boyfriends before.

Sherlock Holmes

I myself have not. But perhaps I just haven't met the right guy.

Dr. Joan Watson

So we have some time to talk.

Sherlock Holmes

About what?

Dr. Joan Watson

About the AwayKay next door and how the whole thing is your fault.

Dr. Joan Watson

He was afraid of you!

Sherlock Holmes

Did I threaten him?

Dr. Joan Watson

You don't even remember if you threatened him.

Sherlock Holmes

I was on drugs!

Dr. Joan Watson

You are the one who makes all the noise!

Sherlock Holmes

And you're the one who never stops me.

Dr. Joan Watson

Well, I am sorry that I accused you of arson.

Sherlock Holmes

Well, I was the obvious suspect.

Sherlock Holmes

We'll examine the scene of [your brother's] death. But not because of your connection to my father. If anything, we're gonna have to look past that.

I'll pay you whatever you need.

Sherlock Holmes

My thoughts exactly.

Sherlock Holmes

If someone is, say, a cannibal serial killer, that's not enough to call them crazy. As long as you know that eating and killing your victims is wrong, you're considered sane in the eyes of the law.

That's what the law says.

Dr. Joan Watson

In the work that Dr. Naylor did for you, did the name Morland Holmes ever come up?

Holmes? Related to you?

Sherlock Holmes

That's what the law says.

Sherlock Holmes

She hoped that her data would be used by the courts to create standardized sentencing guidelines.

Dr. Joan Watson

Do you think this has something to do with why she was murdered?

Sherlock Holmes

The study did earn Dr. Naylor her share of detractors. Wealth and race presently play a far greater role in sentencing than anyone would care to admit. Now any attempt to change that represents a seismic upsetting of the applecart, and it's easy to imagine any number of Father's cronies liking the applecart just the way it is.

Sherlock Holmes

I don't know why I didn't see it sooner.

Dr. Joan Watson

See what?

Sherlock Holmes

The hiring of psychopaths, the machinations, the manipulation of world events....We've dealt with this organization before, Watson. It was run by Moriarity.

Dr. Joan Watson

Are you talking to me?

Sherlock Holmes

You left?

Dr. Joan Watson

Well, you hadn't said anything to me in almost an hour.

Dr. Joan Watson

What just happened?

Sherlock Holmes

I just disarmed the bomb.

Dr. Joan Watson

But you didn't pick a wire, you ju--

Sherlock Holmes

Despite the plots of the many movies you tell me are good which are in fact not good, bomb-makers don't build tests of electrical-engineering skill, they build devices that go bang.

Sherlock Holmes

We find the dissenter, propose an alliance.

Dr. Joan Watson

With the person who just tried to blow us up?

Sherlock Holmes

The enemy of my enemy, Watson.