Jo Grant quotes from Doctor Who

This thing actually attacked you?

Jo Grant

It was going to if Mike hadn't shot it. It was horrible.

Seems as though you may be right, Doctor.

I usually am.

Well, it's dead enough now.

Jo, where were you when this thing started moving?

Jo

I was on the telephone.

And what about you, Captain Yates?

I wasn't here, I'd just gone out to, uh, fetch a tin of cocoa.

Yes, well something must have-[pause] Fetch a tin of what?

Cocoa.

Are you trying to tell me that you were going to make cocoa in my lab?!

That was the general idea. I'm sorry, Doctor.

Jo Grant

(after the Doctor tells her about the Thunderbolt missile) But what's it got to do with The Master?

Everything. He's hoping to steal it.

Jo

Doctor, I thought the TARDIS was working again?

What gave you that idea?

Jo

Well, being dragged 500 years into the future, for example? I mean, all that business with the miners and the colonists.

My dear Jo, the TARDIS was working then because it was being operated under remote control by the High Council of the Time Lords.

Jo

Well, if it worked for them-

I don't want it to work for them: I want it to work for me. No one's going to turn me into an interplanetary puppet.

Now, are there are more transmitters on this fort?

No, nothing.

Any transistor radios, that sort of thing?

I think so. The crew's quarters. The crew...

Jo Grant

What do you want to do? Listen to Night Ride?

Jo Grant

Those things that attacked us - you said you'd seen something like it before.

Something very similar, certainly. They emerged from some caves in Derbyshire.

Jo Grant

The Silurians, wasn't it? The Brigadier was telling me.

That's a complete misnomer. The chap who discovered them must have got the period wrong. No, properly speaking, they should have been called the "Eocenes".

Jo Grant

That was that race of super-reptiles that had been in hibernation for billions of years, wasn't it?

That's right, and if you want my opinion, there's another of their colony right here beneath us.

Jo Grant

Well, something seems to have woken them up.

Probably the rebuilding of this fort.

Jo Grant

But I thought you said they lived in caves?

Well, this is a different species, completely adapted to life underwater.

Jo Grant

And they've been sinking the ships?

Very likely.

Jo Grant

Why? I mean, why are they so hostile? What have we done to them?

They still think of Earth as their planet, Jo, and they want it back. As far as they're concerned, man is just an ape who got above himself.

Jo

[looking at the sky] It's a doomy old day. I mean, just look at that sky. Just look at it.

Do stop wiffling, Jo, there's a good girl. We're not out on a pleasure jaunt, you know?

Jo

Sorry, Doctor.

Only, if it is the Master, we can't run the risk of losing him. You just keep your eye on the time sensor.

Jo

Right. [the Time Sensor promptly starts working] Doctor?

Yeah?

Jo

It's working again.

[stops Bessie] What's the bearing?

Jo

Er, oh seven four, and, er, sixteen point three nine miles away.

Well, that's Venusian miles. In Earth miles, that's be about seventy two point seven nine. Let's take a look at the map. [pulls up the map] Well, we're about here. That should put us somewhere around there. A village called Wootton.

Jo

Wootton? Well, that's where the Brigadier and Sergeant Benton are.

TOM-TIT? If the Master's behind that. What time's the demonstration?

Jo

2 o'clock.

We've got to stop it. Hang on tight, Jo. [puts Bessie into Super Drive and off they rocket]

Jo

Wow, what a groovy dress. Do you reckon it'll get mum's approval?

Mum? Oh, you mean Queen Galleia?

Jo

Yeah, guess so. [giggles]

Mum.

Jo

Anyway, let's go and give her a preview. [walks to the door]

No, I'm sorry. She does not wish to be disturbed. The Lord Master is with her.

Jo

Is he now?

They speak of the sacred mysteries.

Jo

Kronos and all that bit?

It is forbidden.

Jo

But that is what they're on about?

Yes.

Jo

Right. [begins to open the door]

[stops Jo] No, you mustn't go in! You mustn't!

Jo

Look, I'll be as quiet as a... Do they have Mice in Atlantis?

Yes.

Jo

Well, that's what I'll be as quiet as. An Atlantean Mouse, OK? [opens the door a little]

Jo, it's all quite simple - I am he and he is me!

Jo Grant

And we are all together, coo coo cachoo?

What?

Jo Grant

It's a song by The Beatles.

Really? How does it go? [Brings recorder to his lips]

Oh, please be quiet!

[As he appears on the TARDIS's television screen] Ah, there you are! I seem to be stuck up here. [He examines the Second and Third Doctors.] So you're my replacements. [They smile at him.] Humph. A dandy and a clown. [They appear insulted.] Have you done anything?

Uh, well we've assessed the situation-

Just as I thought! [Chuckles] Nothing.

Well it's not easy you know.

It's not as if we know what that stuff is.

No.

Then I'll tell you. It's a time bridge.

It's a what?

I see!

Now what's a bridge for, eh?

Well. Um.

Crossing?

Right! So now dilly-dallying and cross it.

No! No wait!

You faded him again!

I did not fade him. You saw him!

Yes, you certainly did.

Jo Grant

I hate to ask, but who was that?

Me [The Doctors look at each other] Me!

Jo Grant

It's fabulous!

Yes, most impressive, I must admit that.

Almost worth the trip just to see this place.

Jo Grant

Yes, but who brought us here, and why?

I did! I am the one who brought you here!

Who are you?

In the legends of your people, I am called Omega!

Omega? But that's impossible! Omega was destroyed!

No, brother Time lord. I was not destroyed, as you can see! [Emerges from the shadows]

[referring to the monitor's display] Jo, look. That's Skaro.

Jo

Yes....

Any regrets?

Jo

Not really...

Jo... That's only one little world. There's so many hundreds of others to see.

Jo

There's only one little world I want to see right now. [presses a few buttons on the TARDIS console] That one.

That one? But Jo, that's Earth.

Jo

That's right, Doctor. Home.

Home it is, Miss Grant.

Oh, better save the lamps, eh?

Jo

Right, OK.

Jo

Bert? How can light get down here?

Well, it can't.

Jo

Then how can I see you?

Hey, that's funny.

Jo

What's that smell? It's like something rotting!

Hey, look.

Jo

Ugh, that smell! What is it?

I've never seen anything like it!

Jo

I wouldn't touch--

Agh! It burns!

You got onto your uncle at United Nations, didn't you?

Jo

It's only the second time I've ever asked him for anything.

Yes, and look where the first time got you.

Jo

You don't mind, do you?

Mind? He might even be able to turn you into a scientist.

Jo

Don't go too far away, will you? And if you do, come back and see us sometime.

Yes.

Jo

Thank you. Lovely.

Save me a piece of wedding cake.

Jo

Right.

Oh, I nearly forgot. Your wedding present. [Gives her the blue Metabelis crystal]

Jo

It's beautiful. Thank you, Doctor.

Hey, Jo, come and drink a toast to the happy couple.

Jo

But that's us!

Aye, so it is. Don't worry, Doctor. I'll look after her.

Why do they call him "Spider-Man"? Don't they like him?

Young Grant

He was bitten by a radioactive spider, and guess what happened?

Radiation poisoning, I should think.

Young Grant

No. He got special powers.

What? Vomiting. Hair loss. And death. Fat lot of use.