Jamie McCrimmon quotes from Doctor Who

Jamie

You must have been a nasty little boy.

Oh, I was. But I had a very enjoyable childhood.

Jamie

Me Doctor? But you said we were never to touch the controls.

Quite right, Jamie! Welcome to the TARDIS.

Thank you. You're doing so well impersonating me, I thought I might return the compliment.

... And Giles Kent?

...unfortunately, didn't survive the explosion.

We're going to put you outside Salamander. No friends. No safety. Nothing. You'll run, but they'll catch up with you.

Jamie

You mean to say that this place supplies all the gas for the whole of the south of England?

And for the whole of Wales.

Victoria

What are all those lights for?

Well, that's a plan of the entire compound and each of those lights represents a remote control camera that I can switch through to this screen if I want to look at any particular area. Like this.

Jamie

Oh. Where are all these rigs people talk about?

Well, they're out at sea, of course, but that plan over there shows you the relative position of all the rigs under our command.

Victoria

What's the big one in the middle?

Well, that's the central control rig complex, the sort of the nerve centre of the whole thing. The other rigs feed her with gas and she in turn pumps it to us via the main pipeline, see.

Victoria

How awful to have to live out at sea. And lonely.

Oh, I don't know. Mister Robson once spent four years on one of the early rigs without ever going ashore.

Jamie

Aye, that would account for quite a lot.

If you don't mind my saying so, Mister Van Lutyens, I think this is a very bad idea of yours. You don't know what you're up against.

Jamie

Aye, you wouldn't catch me down there.

Why don't we wait until Mister Harris comes back, sir?

The only way to find out if this weed stuff of yours is blocking the base of the impeller is to go down and have a look.

Look, Mister Van Lutyens, I have no authority to send my men down there.

I realize that. That's why I'm going down.

By yourself?

Oh yes.

I wouldn't go down. Well, I hope you know what you're doing, sir.

I think so.

I wish you wouldn't do this, Mister Van Lutyens.

I can't sit about waiting any longer. I have no position of authority here but I do have the run of the company installations, and if I can do nothing else I can at least inspect the base of the impeller shaft. [puts on a gas mask and steps through the airlock onto the impeller shaft lift platform] Tot straks.

Good luck.

Jamie

Aye, you'll need it.

All right, lower him down.

Jamie

Oh, no, you're not thinking of what I think you're thinking of, are you?

That, I think, Jamie, depends upon what you think I am thinking!

Is that the right way?

Jamie

Of course it's the right way. No it could be... erm...

Jamie

No, I wouldn't say that. We're just er... well...um... [beat] You want to know something?

What?

Jamie

I think we're lost.

This is impossible!

[Checks the communications link] The signal! There is no power!

You did this!

Yes. That signal has been going no further than this control room.

But they were receiving my signal!

Not your signal. Ours.

You sent a signal from Earth?

We sent up a satellite. That signal has sent your fleet into a false orbit!

The heat of the sun will kill them! You have destroyed our entire fleet!

You tried to destroy an entire world.

Earth will still die. The Fungus will take the oxygen from your atmosphere.

No, I'm afraid you've failed there too. We can destroy the Fungus.

[Seething with rage, turns to his only remaining Ice Warrior] Kill him!

Jamie

Doctor!

Jamie, look out! [leaps over the T-Mat control desk and tackles the Ice Warrior]

Jamie

[leaps across the room and tackles the Ice Warrior] Creag Au Tuire!

[holding up his solar energy power leads] Jamie, a live terminal!

Oh, well done, Jamie! Oh, goodness me! Jamie, thank you very much. Now then, we must T-Mat ourselves back to Earth.

If these Time Lords are your friends, why don't you wait for them?

You don't understand, Mister Russell I must go! Please!

[With pistols drawn] You stay here with us, my friend.

Look, I am not going to argue. Jamie, Zoe, Cartsairs, into the machine.

Jamie

But, Doctor, he's not joking, y'know!

For once, Jamie, do as you are told!

You move and I kill you!

Then you will just have to kill me, Mister Villar.

Well, Mister Doctor, that is just what I will do.

You can't shoot him in the back. He's helped us too much.

The back, the front, what's the difference?

It's too late now anyway.

Don't Worry. When the Time Lords get him, he'll wish you had killed him.

Goodbye, Jamie.

Jamie

But Doctor, surely we can't just-

Goodbye, Jamie.

Jamie

I'll never forget you, you know.

I won't forget you! Goodbye, Zoe.

Will we ever meet again?

Again? Now, Zoe, you know that time is relative.

Well, you certainly look better for your change of clothes and bath! You should try it more often.

Jamie

Thank you. [realises what the Doctor just said] What?

Jamie

Oh Dastari said he did operations that turned her into a genius.

What a stupid thing to do!

Jamie

That's what the Doctor said.

And I was right. Whatever he has done to her mind, her nature will remain the same.

[after being hunted by Shockeye but defeating him with Oscar's discarded Lepidopteran equipment] I believe he's now been, moth-balled.

[after summoning his TARDIS] Jamie?

Jamie

[To the Second Doctor] Um after you, Doctor.

Oh no. After you Jamie.

Jamie

Bye Peri.

Peri

Bye.

Jamie

[To the Sixth Doctor] Um Doctor.

Jamie. And keep an eye on the old gentlemen, will you?