A character in Doctor Who
Third Doctor
Doctor Who · 1,966 quotes
In 59 of the 1,966 quotes from Doctor Who
Most scenes with: Jo Grant (8), Sarah Jane Smith (7), Brigadier Lethbridge-Stewart (7)
How kind of you to drop in, Doctor. I've been looking forward to having a little chat with you.
Who are you? Where are you?
[laughs] You disappoint me, Doctor. I should have thought you'd have guessed. I am the boss. I'm all around you.
[The Doctor turns around to see a red circular screen, with wavy lines appearing as the BOSS speaks]
Exactly. I am the computer.
Well, Doctor, have you nothing to say?
(Derisively.) Why should I want to talk to a machine?
(He starts to wander around the room as BOSS gives out a short laugh.)
Oh really, Doctor! As far as I can gather from your computer record at UNIT, the difficult thing is to stop you talking. (Laughs.) No, no, no, you won't provoke me so easily.
You're still a machine.
And you? And your human friends? Aren't you machines - inefficient and organic machines?
No.
No?
(Thinks.) Then yes.
(He wanders across to the far side of the room to look at one particular bank.)
The whole is greater than the sum of its parts. We are more than machines.
Ah! Thank you - because in that case, so am I.
What are you then?
I am the first Biomorphic Organisational Systems Supervisor.
(Spells.) B, O, double S - the BOSS!
Precisely!
(Amused.) Ha!
(He wanders over to another area of the room.)
Ah! My designers also found it amusing. I find it suitable.
You're still nothing but a gigantic adding machine like any other computer.
Oh no! No, no, no, no - I am the only computer ever to be linked to a human brain.
Stevens?
Yes - Stevens! And I learned from him that secret of human creativity is inefficiency.
(The Doctor starts to leaf through a pile of computer printouts.)
The human brain is a very poor computer indeed. It makes illogical guesses which turn out to be more logical than logic itself.
Yes, infuriating, isn't it?
I programmed Stevens to programme me to be inefficient. I am now self-controlling, I am self-sufficient, I am the greatest being this planet has ever seen - I am the BOSS!
Today Llanfairfach, tomorrow the world, eh?
How well you understand me, Doctor.
A machine - a megalomaniac machine...
(He throws the pile of papers into the air.)
But still a machine!
And as such, uniquely fitted to carry out my prime directive.
And that is?
Efficiency, productivity and profit for Global Chemicals, of course. Nothing and nobody can be allowed to stand in the way of that! Not even you, Doctor...
[the Doctor has ferreted out Sarah Jane's identity] Are you going to give me away, Doctor?
I don't think so.
[suddenly cheering] Why not?
[leans back, tents his fingers] Well, you can make yourself useful. We need someone around here to make the coffee.
[incensed] If you think I'm going to spend my time making cups of coffee for you...
[she halts as the Doctor leaps out of his chair. Reubish is scribbling something in chalk on the side of the TARDIS]
Professor! Would you kindly desist? This isn't a blackboard, you know!
[begins to unlock the TARDIS door]
Oh, I do beg your pardon, Doctor. I was just trying to prove...
What are you going to do in there?
[opens the TARDIS door] Make myself a cup of coffee. Good day to you.
You're serious, aren't you?
About what I do? Yes, not necessarily the way I do it.
It's coming this way, sir!
Good grief.... It's a Stegosaurus!
[Railton leads the five people and three Daleks. In a dried river bed, the Doctor spots soil tumbling down the deep sides. Everyone stops and looks around. Suddenly, Railton is shot in the back by an arrow]
Take cover!
Locate the enemy! Locate the enemy!
[As the Dalek repeatedly cries "Locate", Jill runs to Railton, but he is dead. Exxilons appear on the skyline as the men find a dug-out depression to hide]
Help me with him! Help me!
It's no good, we can't help him.
But please, we can't leave him here!
[More arrows thud into the ground nearby]
Quick, come on! Out, come on!
Doctor! We were just playing the main part in a sacrificial ceremony, weren't we?
Well, that seemed to be the general idea, yes.
Well, how are they going to sacrifice us just by dumping us down here?
Yes, I knew that thought would occur to you, sooner or later.
You've got an idea, haven't you?
Yes. And it's not one of my favorites. In fact, I don't care for it at all.
Well, you might as well share it.
Oh, very well. I think they expect that sacrifice to be completed by something else. Something that lives down this tunnel.
[And right on cue comes a strange warbling sort of roar]
Next time you get an idea, keep it to yourself, will you?
[The Doctor and Sarah Jane hear another strange, mechanical roaring sound]
That sounded awfully close.
Some sort of subterranean wind effect, I should think.
[And another]
Who are you kidding?
Myself, chiefly.
[Two Daleks enter the tunnel. As the Doctor and Sarah walk on, something similar to an Exxilon follows them. The roar again]
I just heard your wind effect gnashing its teeth. Well, which way now?
I think I'll make a short reconnaissance down this tunnel here. Alone.
[pointing] Doctor! Look! Look at the city!
[They watch as the now powerless city gives in to the ravages of time and rapidly decays into a pile of rubble]
It's rather a pity, in a way...now the universe is down to 699 wonders.
The citadel of Peladon, Sarah. One of the most interesting and-
Oh no it isn't - is it, Doctor?
Well, no, not exactly.
No, it's not your precious citadel at all. It's another rotten gloomy old tunnel!
Yes, well, with the scanner still on the blink, there was no way I could really check.
There's more than the scanner on the blink.
Let us see what has emerged. [To Ortron] You say that the miners have rebelled against their proper rulers, but Gebek here says that the nobles have cheated them of their rights. You say that the Doctor here is a spy and a saboteur, but the ambassador says he is an old and valued friend. [To Gebek] You say that your God appears to you because he is angry, but the Doctor here is sure that the appearances are caused by trickery.
An excellent summing up, Commander Azaxyr. Do you know, you'd have made a very good judge.
You forget, Doctor. I am your judge. Your jury and executioner too. Perhaps.
[The Doctor searches for Sarah on Metebelis Three and looks in a blue lit cave]
Quickly, Doctor! Quickly!
Stop! If you come any further, Doctor, you will die. Oh, not at once, but gradually every cell in your body will be irretrievably damaged by the crystal rays, and I need you alive.
I heard the voice of my assistant!
Have no fear. She is quite safe.
But she called out to me for help!
[laughs] Like this?
Doctor, help me! Come quickly!
[The Doctor walks forward]
No! It is an illusion! Listen!
[singing] Half a pound of Tuppenny Rice, half a pound of Treacle. That's the way the Money goes.
[Pop]
[singing] Goes the Weasel.
Who... Who are you?
They call me the Great One.
Why can't I see you?
You will, Doctor, you will, all in good time, but not until you bring me the crystal you stole from Metebelis.
But why do want that particular Crystal? It's no different from all the others.
Oh, but it is. You took the one last perfect crystal of Power. I searched all time and space for it! I must have it!
No! No, Never!
[laughs] You are proud, Little man. I see that I shall have to teach you to have respect. Round you go, Doctor.
No! No! No, I will not!
[Against his will, the Doctor turns left, stepping high, as the Great One laughs]
No! No, I will not! No!
[The Doctor has turned right round and back to where he started]
Is that fear I can feel in your mind? You are not accustomed to feeling frightened, are you, Doctor? You are very wise to be afraid of me. Go now. You must hurry back and fetch the crystal. I must have it, don't you understand? I must have it! I must! I must! I must! Go now. Go! Go! Go now!
[The Doctor runs back down the Rock Passage]
[The Doctor returns to the Great One's cave with the crystal]
Stop! Have you brought the crystal to me?
Well, if I had not, why should I return?
Very well, very well, advance.
[The Doctor walks forward and sees the universe's biggest spider]
I brought you the crystal. Now why don't you just take it and leave the humans in peace, Both here and on Earth?
[laughs] You think I care for the puny plans of my subjects? Earth? One paltry planet among millions? Give me the crystal. I thirst for it! I ache for it!
Well, why is it so important to you?
You see this web of crystal above my head? It reproduces the pattern of my brain. One perfect crystal and it will be complete. That is the perfect crystal I need.
And then?
My every thought will resonate within the web and grow in power until, until, until [laughs]
But you've built a positive feedback circuit! You're trying to increase your mental powers to infinity!
Exactly! I shall be the ruler of the entire universe! [laughs]
Now listen to me. Listen. I haven't got much time left. What you're trying to do is impossible. If you complete that circuit, the energy will build up and up until it cannot be contained. You will destroy yourself!
You waste the little time remaining to you. Even now the cave of crystal is destroying the cells of your body. I will grant you one last favor. You may watch the completion of my triumph before you die!
[the crystal flies out of the Doctor's hands and becomes the keystone of the web lattice]
I am... complete! Now, I am... total... power! All praise to the Great One! [laughs]
Stop! Stop! Don't you see what's happened to you!?
All praise to the Great One! All praise to me! Bow down before me, planets! Bow down, Stars! Bow down, o Galaxies and worship the Great One! The me! The great, all powerful me! [starts to glow red] AAAAAHHH!! I HURRRRTT!! HELP MEE!! I'M BURNING, MY BRAIN IS ON FIRE!! HELP MEEEEEEEEEE!!! AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!
[The Doctor runs out of the cave]
[The Third Doctor's last words.]
I had to face my fear ... that was more important than just going on living ...
(Sarah Jane: Please...don't die!)
A tear, Sarah Jane? No, don't cry. While there's life, there's...
[The Doctor dies. Sarah closes his eyes.]
Hope.
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