Now you know my secret, you ready to tell me yours?
[voiceover] Over your dead body!
“Teenage Wasteland” · Season 5, Episode 9
In this episode: Dexter Morgan (10), Lumen (4), Astor Bennett (3), Jordan Chase (3), Vince Masuka (2), Deb (2), Debra Morgan (1), Angel Batista (1)
[voiceover] An hour on the treadmill and I came up empty, not a clue. The only upside is that I got in my cardio for the day. Jordan is one tough nut to crack.
You're one tough nut to crack, you know that Dexter?
[voiceover] I wish he'd stop doing that.
RReceptionist
Mr. Chase says he's been beefing things up.
[voiceover] Well that's no surprise. Lumen and I have been knocking off his friends one by one.
Share something with her. What you did with her when you were her age.
I killed the neighbor's dog
Well don't tell her that.
Harrison. He doesn't even recognize me.
Well you didn't look like a raccoon the last time he saw you.
We've got to re-open this case.
DDeb
I know, but I can't tell LaGuerta, I'm supposed to be on file clerk duty.
I can't tell LaGuerta; this case was solved. If I ask her to re-open it, I might as well put my balls in a vice and not in a hot way.
Well that just leaves me.
Astor showed up drunk on my doorstep with a friend.
How old's the friend? [long pause] Just kidding.
DDeb
I didn't know he had a tenant.
I didn't know he had a sister.
[Dexter has recently learned that Barry is beating Olivia]
BBarry
It's tough looking after somebody else's kid. Sometimes you just gotta show 'em who's boss.
Is that what you do with Olivia, show her who's boss?
BBarry
What's that supposed to mean?
I know about Olivia's bruises. How they're strategically placed so they won't show.
BBarry
I don't know what you're talking about.
No? Let me show you? [Dexter punches Barry twice in the chest, causing him to gasp and cough in pain] That's your solar plexus. Right now your diaphragm is partially paralyzed which is why you're having trouble catching your breath.
BBarry
[coughing] What are you, man? Some kind of psycho?
Not today, just a concerned parent. [Punches Barry twice in the side, causing him to gasp further] That's your liver. [Punches him in the liver three more times] The nice thing about the liver is if you hit it just right, you hit the vagus nerve which tentacles out to the rest of your body. [Punches him there twice more] Your brain short-circuits, your body shuts down, and you feel, what's the word? Terror? Which is what Olivia felt every time you hit her there just so the bruises wouldn't show. I want you to listen to me carefully. Listen to me very carefully, because this is what you're gonna do. You're gonna call Olivia's mother, you're gonna tell her you're sick of her fat ass. You can't stand to look at it anymore. And you're gonna make her believe it. Because if you don't, she may take you back one day, and let you near her kid, or mine. And I can't let that happen. [Throws Barry to the ground] You're not even gonna swing by to pick up your stuff, you're just gonna leave. Tomorrow, when I drop Olivia off, you will be gone. If you ever come back, believe me I won't go so easy next time. [Kicks Barry in the side] By the way, that's your kidney. [Walks off. Gets into his car]
I can't believe it.
I don't want to hear it, okay. "This isn't your business, Dexter. Don't get involved, Dexter. You put too much at risk, Dexter."
That's not what I was going to say. [Dexter looks at him, surprised] I'm proud of you.
You are?
You protected Astor. Put yourself out there for another person. I had no idea you had that in you. I underestimated you, assumed you were a monster. When you were capable of, so much more. If only I'd seen that, maybe I wouldn't have lead you down this path.
[Lumen is at Dexter's house when the house phone rings]
[answering it]' Dexter?
No, it's Jordan Chase. But I'm looking for Dexter, is he there?
[terrified] He - He's not available right now.
Can I leave a message?
[still terrified] Uh-huh.
Tell him, I'm just checking in and I'd like him to schedule another appointment. As soon as possible.
Okay, I will. Bye.
Hang on a second. Tell Dexter one more thing.
[controlling herself] Okay.
Tell him time is of the essence. [With deliberate slowness] Tick, tick, tick, [Lumen appears to be close to tears] that's the sound of his life running out. Could you be sure to tell him that? Take care, Lumen. [He hangs up, leaving Lumen gasping in terror]
I didn't notice you last time - you new here?
RReceptionist
Just started three days ago.
I don't remember so much security either.
RReceptionist
Mr Chase says he's beefing things up.
[Voiceover: That's no surprise. Lumen and I have been knocking off his friends one by one.]
You gonna introduce us?
That's the one I was telling you about - his new girlfriend.
She's my tenant. Lumen, this is my sister Debra. Deb, Lumen.
I didn't know he had a tenant.
Didn't know he had a sister. I'm gonna...go check on the girls.
Seriously? That's your tenant?
Yes.
Where's all her stuff?
She hasn't really moved in yet.
But you know her well enough to trust her with your son.
It was an emergency. I thought the girls had been taken.
Why are you keeping her a secret?
I'm not.
Really? Cos at the station we asked you who you were spending your time with. You didn't think to mention the hot blonde that's living in your house?
Didn't seem...like it mattered. Obviously she didn't take the girls.
That's not the point. I'm not judging you. Believe me - I understand rebound as much as anybody. But don't you think it's a little soon?
I'm not on any rebound.
Come on. She's your tenant - really?
There's nothing going on.
Fine. I give up.
I want you to know something. If Lumen's your girlfriend, I want you to tell me.
OK. But she's not.
She's not just your tenant, though.
She's a friend...who's been through some really...really bad stuff. I'm helping her deal with it.
Does it make you feel better?
What do you mean?
About Mom. Being there for Lumen...does it make you feel better about what happened to Mom?
Dexter ...I Love You. You know that?
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Dexter pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.