Elim Garak quotes from Deep Space Nine

[laughing] Ah, yes, Romulus. How well I remember it. You'll find the predominant color to be grey. The buildings, the clothes, the people. Did you know that the Romulan heart itself is grey? It's true. And altogether appropriate for such an unimaginative race.

Julian Bashir

You know, some people say that you remained on DS9 as the eyes and ears of your fellow Cardassians.

You don't say! Doctor, you're not intimating that I'm some sort of spy, are you?

Julian Bashir

I wouldn't know, sir.

Ah, an open mind. The essence of intellect.

Julian Bashir

You’re very kind, Mister Garak.

Oh, it’s just Garak. Plain, simple—

Garak.

Julian Bashir

If you're not a spy, maybe you're an outcast.

Or maybe I'm an outcast spy.

Julian Bashir

How can you be both?

I never said I was either.

I am no more a spy than you are...

Julian Bashir

...a doctor.

Julian Bashir

Still the man of mystery.

Oh, you wouldn't have me any other way.

Doctor, has anyone ever told you that you are an infuriating pest?

Julian Bashir

Chief O'Brien—all the time, and I never pay any attention to him either!

Julian Bashir

And so they exiled you.

That's right! And left me to live out my days with nothing to look forward to but having lunch with you.

Julian Bashir

I'm sorry you feel that way. I thought you enjoyed my company.

Oh, I did! And that's the worst part. I can't believe that I actually enjoyed eating mediocre food and staring into your smug sanctimonious face.

Julian Bashir

What I want to know is: out of all the stories you told me, which ones were true and which ones weren't?

My dear doctor...they're all true.

Julian Bashir

Even the lies?

Especially the lies.

Julian Bashir

Well, I guess this means the end of our Starfleet careers.

Well, I wouldn't worry about that, Doctor.

Jadzia Dax

That's easy for you to say.

Oh, you misunderstand me, Lieutenant. All I meant was, it's a little foolish to worry about your careers at a time like this, when there's a good chance we're all about to be killed.

You can't be serious! Commander, if I were allowed on Cardassia, do you really think I'd be living here?

Sisko

Which brings up an interesting point. There're certain ministers in the Bajoran government who are concerned about your presence on the station; in fact, they want you removed. Right now, I see no alternative but to honor their request, unless of course... I can show them how you might be valuable to us.

Odo

Rescuing Kira would go a long way toward improving your standing with the Bajoran government.

Why should I care what the Bajoran government thinks of me?

Sisko

I don't know. But it seems to me, if someone were in trouble with the Cardassian Central Command, a Bajoran space station under Federation control might just be the safest place in the galaxy.

Commander, this is extortion.

Sisko

Hmm...yes, it is.

Julian Bashir

The point is, if you lie all the time, nobody's going to believe you even when you're telling the truth.

Are you sure that's the point, Doctor?

Julian Bashir

Of course. What else could it be?

That you should never tell the same lie twice.

Bashir

Is there anything you need me to do while you're gone?

Like what?

Bashir

I don't know— Any unfinished business?

Actually, Doctor, there is something. If you go into my quarters and examine the bulkhead next to the replicator, you'll notice there’s a false panel. Behind that panel is a compartment containing an isolinear rod. If I'm not back within 78 hours, I want you to take that rod and eat it.

Bashir

Eat it?!

Um-hum.

Bashir

You're joking.

Yes, Doctor, I am.

Bashir

Very. Funny.

I thought so! But the answer to your question, Doctor, is, “No. There is nothing you can do for me while I'm away.”

Enabran Tain

Do you remember getting that confession out of Dr. Parmak?

I never even touched him.

Enabran Tain

That was the beauty of it. You just sat there for—what, three hours?

Four!

Enabran Tain

And after four hours of watching you stare at him, he confessed.

I was good, wasn't I?

Enabran Tain

You were brilliant. Afterwards, he just kept saying, "His eyes... his eyes."

The fleet has re-cloaked and is heading to our destination at Warp six.

Warp six? That's a little slow, isn't it?