TV show quotes
Look, you like Harley, right?
She has her strong points. Ok. I mean, as long as we're talking man to man, yeah, I like her. A lot.
Well, good. Congratulations, man. 'Cause true feelings for a woman, that's about the best experience you're ever gonna have. I mean, it'll make you strong, it'll make you stupid, and it will definitely take you closer to being the man you want to be.
Yeah, I don't know why I should be taking advice from you. Like you're some kind of Yoda when it comes to the chicks.
Have you seen my date?
Tell me more, Sensei.
Hey. Ooh.
Yeah, I know. Kids today, huh?
That damn rap music.
And those baggy pants. Even with the damage to my unsuspecting eardrum, I did think that tonight was quite nice. Quite nice.
Yes. Quite. Perfect. It was... it's been a perfect night....Pace? I can't do this.
You can't do what?
Even when everything is perfect, being with you doesn't feel right, and I'm sorry. Look, everything tonight-- I mean, tonight was lovely and fun and... you've become this... I mean, this amazing man, but it doesn’t... I'm sorry. I don’t... I don't feel it. And I can't do this with you.
Ok, Joey, just slow down for a second.
No, Pace, it’s... it's true and... I'm sorry.
So what, you're scared. Right? You're scared. And so am I, believe me. And I'm scared because I don't know where this thing is going, Jo. As in, I think it could go anywhere. This could be it.
It won't be.
How could you possibly know that? I mean, really. Last week, you're onboard, and now you're just psychically telling me that this could never be something great. You can't possibly know that, because we don't know that, Joey.
And I'm sorry. I know that this is such a horrible thing to say.
But how? How could you know? And when did you make this decision, tonight? I mean, I thought tonight was going great.
It was. It was great.
So then when? And don't tell me that you're not scared, because I know that you are. I mean, I've known you too long and seen you push away too many good things to let you push me away right now. My whole life, Joey, my whole life you have been the most beautiful thing in my orbit. And my feelings for you were what proved to me that I could be great. And those feelings were stronger and were wiser and more persistent and more resilient than anything else about me.
Pacey, stop.
Jo—
Pacey!
When I was afraid of everything, I was never afraid to love you and I could love you again. I could. I’m telling you, this could...
Pacey, no. Pacey, stop! Eddie came back. I'm sorry. He came back last night. He came to the bar—
Oh. Okay.
Look, I'm sorry— [Pacey walks away]
And as my fist was rocketing towards his neck, I was just, like, you know, Patrick, you're a lover, not a fighter.
That last part was pretty obvious. And as for the first part...
You mean the lover part?
Not a chance.
Oh. Well, I didn't mean it literally. Well, yeah, I did, but... you know, that's not the reason I'm at the dance with you. I'm at the dance with you because if I weren't, you'd be with some other guy, and that would kill me.
Because you like me?
Yeah.
Nice speech. Pacey teach you that?
Yeah. Yeah, that and how to unhook a bra with one hand.
Try it and you'll have one hand left.
You excited about the hosting gig tonight?
Mm-hmm.
Yeah? Who knows? You could become the next Ryan Seacrest. You could borrow one of his man-blouses.
Want to make out?
No.
Good. That was your test, buddy. You break her heart again and I'm going to kill you. You got it?
Oh, my god! Where is he?
Who?
Who? Who? Oh, Jen, Jen. Sweet, sweet, Jen. Such an amusing facade, but it's of no use. You can't keep us apart. It's destiny, I tell you. Destiny. Jen, he was on my plane.
Ladies, put the claws back. No need to fight. Plenty of room on the Carolla coaster for everyone.
I'm afraid I won't meet the minimum-height requirement. It's nice to meet you. I got to go.
Well, what about you? You want to hop on board?
I wasn't talking about you, doofus. I'm kind of looking for Dr. Drew.
Pinsky?
Yes, yes! Do you know where he is?
That geezer's probably out casket shopping. He's old. He's an old man. He's old enough to be your grandfather. Whereas I, I'm just old enough to be your daddy. And plus, the guy's a bore. He's an amazing bore. He never stops talking about gonorrhea and hepatitis G. Believe me, I know. I have to share a hotel room with the guy. Cheap bastards.
Oh, my god. You've shared a room with him? Tell me something. Have you seen him naked?
Yes. Yes, I have.
Well, there's this, uh... girl that I have-- or had a relationship with.
She was a sex buddy?
No, she, uh... she was a girlfriend, actually, and we were together for several months up until this morning, when she dumped me like a sack of rotten trash. No explanation, no warning, no nothing.
Were there any warning signs? Any problems in the relationship?
No, none. Well... I did sleep with one of her friends.
But just one, right? Women don't--they don't mind that kind of stuff. Can't be that.
But she knew about it and it was before we got together, so that doesn't really count, right?
Have you simply tried asking for an explanation?
That's the thing. Every time I try to talk to her, she treats me like I'm Father Damien.
[They look at him strangely]
He was a leper.
Oh, sure. The famous leper, Father Damien. Drew, you wrote your thesis on Father Damien, did you not? All right. Listen, I say run. I mean, this chick's a head case. She's going to take you down, I promise.
Thank you, Adam, for that astute insight, but if you don't mind me saying so, I think that C.J.'S problems here are really subordinate to those of the many members of this audience who have actually paid good money to listen to your vastly under qualified advice.
You're so lucky I don't know what "subordinate" means, honey.
Um...ok, why don't we go to Mandy behind the screen? Mandy, what's your question? Mandy?
Oh. Hi. Sorry, no. Actually, my name is Audrey, and my question is specifically for Dr. Drew. Um, I'm about 5'7". I've got blond hair, blue eyes, great rack.
Audrey, question. Find it.
Oh, right. Ok. Well, um... several months ago, I realized that I had a serious problem with alcohol. I had all these negative feelings about my life, and I was using alcohol as my escape. And in the process, I hurt a lot of people that were very close to me. And if it hadn't been for those very same people, I probably would not have gotten the professional help that I needed. So after spending several weeks in a rehab facility in southern California, um... I guess my question to you is this, Dr. Drew-- how would you like to go back to my dorm room and play a little game I like to call "dirty doctor and naughty nurse?"
Good morning, gentlemen. I had sex with a beautiful woman last night. Now, this should not have happened. She was way out of my league, and I even like to think that I'm a fairly handsome guy, but I'm not that handsome, and I like to think that I'm pretty good in bed, but I'm not that good. How does something like that happen? I'll tell you. I'm 20 years old, and I am doing exactly what I was put on this earth to do. I am making money... hand over fist... faster than I know how to spend it. And let's tell the truth. You all came here today because you're trying to escape the miserable bottom-feeding existence that you've been living that has denied you what is rightfully yours. If you want this for yourselves, you can have it. But I'm here to tell you, you will get your asses kicked on a daily basis, but you will learn. And ultimately, you will do what you were put on this earth to do, which is make money. Now, if any of you are still interested in this proposition, be here 9 A.M. Sharp Monday morning. If you are late, do not come into my building. Turn around, go home, and prepare yourselves for a life in retail. I'll see you then.
Do you think that I was just going out with David to prove something to myself?
Something about what?
Just to prove that I could do it, that I could be in a relationship. You know, have a boyfriend.
I don’t know. I mean, is that something that you feel like you needed to prove to yourself?
Yeah. Who wants to be that 35-year-old guy that's living alone and still going out to the bar scene trying to find the right person?
Give me a break. You're 20 years old. You're not even legally old enough to be in those bars, let alone haunt them with your sad, single self.
Yeah, that from the girl who was on a first-name basis with half the bouncers in New York.
Look, my point is is that I don't think that everybody meets the love of their life when they're a teenager. Or when they're 25. Or even when they're 35. But that doesn't mean that you stop looking and hoping. You know, 'cause you will meet that person, and when you do, I guess you know it.
I just-- I want to ask you one thing before you go.
As long as it doesn't involve me holding you while you cry.
I promise.
What is it, kid?
Well, I was just wondering if maybe you could cover me? Loan me a little money?
You're kidding, right?
No. I wish I was, but... you have no idea how hard it is for me to ask you for this, Rich, but a friend of mine a couple of weeks ago, he came to me and he wanted to double his money really fast. So I just put it all into Stepatech.
That was a stupid move, Pacey.
But he wanted to pull out, and I told him not to, I told him to just trust me and ride the thing out, and this guy is my oldest and closest childhood friend. I cannot screw him like this, Rich.
It's already done, Pacey.
No, I'm serious. All I want to do is give him back his initial investment. And then I'll pay you back with whatever interest you want.
What about you? What happened to your disposable income?
I got nothing left. Everything I had was in Stepatech. I'm worth like, I don't know, 300 bucks right now.
You know, it's funny. You're so good at your job, you're so confident, I sometimes forget how young and stupid you are.
Please, Rich, I need your help, not the speech right now, ok?
Oh, I think you do, actually. And I'm gonna say to you what you should have told your little friend in the first place. No.
That's it? That's all you have to say to me? I come to you, embarrass myself, and you're just gonna say no?
Pretty much, yeah.
You know, Rich, sometimes you're so good at your job I forget what an unfeeling prick you are.
You work for me. I'm your boss. You watch your tone.
Ok, Rich, I'm just asking you for this one favor! Just one time!
I...don’t...do... favors, Witter.
Why not? 'Cause god forbid you have to drop the Gordon Gecko routine for a second? I mean, this would be so easy for you, man. Just help me out here!
Help you out?! I gave you a job, Witter! I gave you a chance to escape some bottom feeder existence, and every step of the way, you have been a holier-than-thou pain in the ass. So you tell me, why should I help you out? Take this pen. Take this pen, Witter, and write down today's date. Because from this day forward, you're going to amount to nothing. You are a failure and a loser, and you deserve everything that can-- uhh!
[Pacey hits him and they begin fighting]
It's all over, Pace. Don't worry... you're fired. That's what you wanted all along, anyway. Loser.
[in a letter to Joey] Dear Joey, as you know, I'm not good at good-byes, but I guess that's what this is. A real one this time. Because as much as I thought I wanted us to be together, I guess what I want more is to be one of those people who lives every moment of his life without indecision and without regrets. Someone who dares to disturb the universe without a thought to the consequences. And you're not one of those people, at least not yet. Maybe you'll prove me wrong about that one day. I hope you do. But who knows? Maybe people can't change. Maybe we're doomed to repeat the same mistakes over and over again no matter how hard we try. I always hope for a happy ending. How crazy is that? Take care of yourself.
I got 3 credit cards in the mail last week, maxed them out in, like, a day. Got lights, cameras, this awesome sound equipment. I'm going completely overboard, but I don't care. I'm talking a mile a minute. I haven't even asked you what brought you to Capeside.
Man. Ha! Being in this room, it just takes me back to a whole other era. When the future was a clean slate for all of us, you know?
Well, the room may have gone back in time, but I think you and I have moved ahead rather nicely. It's about all the obstacles we went through when we were kids. We both ended up doing exactly what we wanted to do.
Well, there was that brief period of time I toyed with the idea of being a rodeo clown, but I guess this'll do. Heh heh.
But you made something of yourself, Pace, and now you're making something out of me.
So they told me you went away for a while.
Let's not be awkward exes, Pacey. I was drying out in Malibu.
Ok. Well, you look great, anyhow.
Clean living, my friend. So, what happened to your job? I know you're not just taking a long lunch break. You're a little too hard-core for that.
Well, I've been reassessing how I allocate my time.
So you're drinking?
I'm thinking about it.
You're thinking about taking a tasty downward spiral? Oh, you'd better quit while you're ahead. You're not cut out for this.
What are you talking about? I could spiral with the best of them. Speaking of... shouldn't you really avoid places like this?
I, um, can't hide from my problems forever. It's kind of how I ended up in rehab in the first place, right?
Well, that's brave of you. But you were always good like that.
Yeah, well, I'll be your personal superhero, ok?
Ok.
Unless of course you want to spend the rest of your days hiding out in dives like this. What are you hiding from, Pacey?
I'm hiding from the suit, because it's evil. Bad things happen when it's on. I allowed people to believe in me for a second, which was foolish, and now it's really coming back to bite them in the ass.
You know what? This isn't you talking. This is your former self rearing its ugly head. Come on, Pacey. I know moments like these. One path is the harsh reality, and one path is the comfortably numb. But guess what? In the morning, when you're all sobered up, the problem's still gonna be there. Only, now it'll be like a big festering wound, and you'll just be the jerk who sat back and let it get worse.
Well, thanks for not walking on eggshells around me.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Dawson's Creek pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
