[walks out of blindingly bright room] Launchpad, will you please turn on the lights?
Uh... The lights are on, DW.
[crashes into a mannequin] Oh, I see.
What do you see?
Nothing. [swallows] Absolutely nothing.
All S1
S1 E15Unfinished Business
Have you lost your senses?!?!
Just one.
Blast it! YOU'RE HANDICAPPED!
We prefer the term physically challenged.
[as Big Chief Power Bill] That my assistant, Little Running Gag.
[as Death Valley Duck] Surrender, Big Chief. You're surrounded by an army of twelve-thousand soldiers. [whispers] That's an old military ploy we call "lying".
Launchpad, are you reading my comic book?
Who, me?
Did Hemingway have this problem? No, because he didn't live next door to the Muddlefoots!
I'd love to stay and chew the fat, babe...
Over my dead batteries! Eat amperes, duck!
Ha! They call me mad! They call me insane! They're right. But I'M running things now!
Fools left me no choice. Just because I missed paying a power bill or two, they threatened to shut me off... in the middle of the greatest scheme of my career!
[talking to a lightbulb] Oh, my sweet darling. You're the ampere of my eye!
Your little game is over, you revolting revisionist! Give it back, so I can finish off the scene where I finish you off!
Wrong! In the last scene I'm gonna finish you off!
Sorry pal, this thing's reality-based. You don't stand a chance against me!
That's what you think, you hackneyed hack! In this edition, I'm now ten times bigger and more powerful!
No way! Lemme see that. Where?
Right there.
What?! What kind of crazy science fiction are you trying to write? In any case, you oughta be twenty times smaller!
What do you think you're doing?! I'm bigger!
Have it your way. I can beat you no matter what size shoe you wear.
Oh, good, saved by my faithful pet, Super Bunny! Wait a minute! Since when did I have a faithful pet named "Super Bunny"?
Never send a bunny to do a duck's job.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Darkwing Duck pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.