Sheldon Hawkes quotes from CSI: NY

Lindsay

I think I'm a pretty nice person. Levelheaded, patient, as is evidenced by the man I've taken as my husband.

Hawkes

God knows how you do it.

Danny

Bet you're not loving the fact that you're the one with the surgeon's hands around here, are you?

Hawkes

Don't get me started.

Hawkes

(Removing evidence from a body) Sid, take a look at this.

Sid

Well, whatever it is, that's certainly a unique shade of green.

Jo

Not one of Mother Nature's own?

Jo

This man was cut in half by a chain saw.

Sid

Even more disturbing, the rawness of the surrounding flesh suggests that our victim was still alive when the sawing began.

Hawkes

Fortunately, the shock and massive blood loss wouldn't have kept him that way for very long.

Hawkes

Hey, Jo. Turns out you were right.

Jo

Oh, I love those three words.

Jo

Cotton, indigo, foil, boric acid. Trace that Sid collected from the wound of our vic.

Hawkes

Okay. Uh, cotton and indigo... sounds like denim. Foil... but boric acid?

Jo

Okay, usually used as an antiseptic, insecticide, flame-retardant, lubricant.

Hawkes

Any number of things.

Jo

(Joking) Uh! I expected so much more from you.

Hawkes

Ouch. That had to hurt.

Jamie Lovato

Not as bad as his bill for his time.

Lindsay

So what would you do in that position?

Hawkes

If somebody gave me a million bucks? I'd probably use it to help underprivileged youth.

Lindsay

Aww.

Hawkes

Or buy a Tesla.

Hawkes

Justin VanderHeyden printed a gun.

Jo

He what?

Hawkes

Yeah. It's called 3-D metal printing, and it works just like any ordinary printer, but instead of using ink to produce an image...

Mac

It uses powdered metals.

Hawkes

Yes. Mixed with steel epoxy resin to create multiple layers of a three-dimensional object.

Jo

Okay, I'm not sure I even want to try to wrap my brain around that.

Jo

You've got to be kidding me.

Hawkes

I wish I was. It's your basic .38, printed whole, with all moving parts.

Mac

Guns are dangerous enough in the wrong hands. Now we have to worry about people being able to print them at home.

Hawkes

Without a permit.

Mac

This is one I almost wish you hadn't figured out.

Jo

Well, you know what they say? Every act of creation is an act of destruction.

Adam

No one puts Lombardo at the scene.

Hawkes

But the science does.

Mac

We're gonna be here all day if I try guessing exactly where you're headed here.

Hawkes

It's our murder weapon.

Mac

Plastic, fatty acids, and gum? That doesn't sound too dangerous.

Hawkes

Low-moisture, part-skim mozzarella. Same stuff they use on pizza.

Danny

If you had told me this morning we'd be investigating a cheese murder, you know what I would have said?

Hawkes

Please don't.

Danny

No whey.

Hawkes

Thought I said don't.

Hawkes

Does that part of the floor look cleaner than the rest?

Danny

Yeah, since when does someone clean a dump like this?

Hawkes

(Sprays it with luminol) When they've spilled a lot of blood.