Don Flack quotes from CSI: NY

Detective Stella Bonasera

What would a woman be doing in the men's bathroom?

I can think of several reasons. All with happier endings.

Mac Taylor

I think we just found our prime suspect.

I love this job.

Mac Taylor

I think we have a suspect.

I love this job.

Thought you had the night off.

Mac

My dinner date dumped me for a dead body.

I thought this was your night off.

Detective Mac Taylor

[referring to Peyton at another crime scene] My dinner date dumped me for a dead body.

Well, Noah was taking these people for a ride, but it wasn't on the Ark. His flock all tested negative for GSR, and they've asked me if they can get back on the good ship looney- tunes before Sunday, because that's when the world's ending. I told them they could re-board when the crime scene's clear, but what I really want to do is throw them all in the shower and then a rubber room.

Mac

They're not crazy.

You think Houdini knew the impact he would have on Mafia lingo?

Sheldon Hawkes

I'm sorry?

When they whack somebody, they say, "we made him do a Houdini". Do you think that would make him proud?

Sheldon Hawkes

Are we actually having this conversation?

Oh, I'm sorry. Can you explain the difference between DNA and RNA? Is that better, 'cause that's scintillating conversation right there.

Sheldon Hawkes

It would be if you knew the answer-

This is what your looking for, it has all three items you showed me in those photographs. You better return this though, it's a collector's item. I don't want to find out you two pulled a Houdini on me.

Danny Messer

[explaining his theory about what happened] Then he was screwed to death.

6.5, Mess. Little shaky on the landing.

I can certainly answer any of your questions or write them down and have Evie respond by e-mail.

That's not how this works. See, we're old school. We're all old light bulbs and cold concrete rooms.

Stella Bonasera

Planning your fantasy death is the ultimate finale to life.

Yeah, but we're talking about an ice pick to the brain, Stella. I think you might be romanticizing.

Stella

Somebody kissed his ring. Lipstick kiss.

Maybe our Lancelot had a rendezvous with Guinevere at the park?

Mac Taylor

The way I feel has never affected the way I do my job.

My weakness, I guess. Every hood Truby ever collared is going to be angling for a get-out-of-jail-free pass. Clay Dobson was just the first in line.

Mac

You having a good time, saying I told you so?

No.

Detective Stella Bonasera

I thought lock and key parties went out in the seventies.

Apparently they've had resurgence. Who knew?

Don't be shy. Everybody's a bit nervous their first time out.

Detective Stella Bonasera

Actually we're not here to participate.

[looking suggestively at Stella] That's our loss.

We're NYPD.

I'm so sorry! That's right, you called earlier. I was expecting big burly men with guns.

If you'd focused your attention in my direction, you might see one.

Detective Stella Bonasera

I thought lock and key parties went out in the seventies.

Apparently they've had resurgence. Who knew?

Don't be shy. Everybody's a bit nervous their first time out.

Detective Stella Bonasera

Actually we're not here to participate.

[looking suggestively at Stella] That's our loss.

We're NYPD.

I'm so sorry! That's right, you called earlier. I was expecting big burly men with guns.

If you'd focused your attention in my direction, you might see one.