Muriel Bagge quotes from Courage the Cowardly Dog

Muriel

Finally, I can relax. (The spider gets closer to Muriel, then she notices it and screams)

Muriel

AHHHHH! Courage, go get help, hurry!

Muriel

Courage! Did you get any help?

Muriel

It was you all along, no-longer-trusted Poohbah. I order you to have your lips sewn shut, your eyebrows plucked, and the rest of you mummified! [Eustace screams in defeat; to the mummified baker] Sorry, royal baker. I goofed. You're exonerated of the crimes of which you are accused.

Muriel

[enters the kitchen] Eustace, I'll get to making dinner, as soon as I'm done cooking that batch of my special secret recipe, Blue Ribbon dog food. [Eustace spits in disgust, pulls out his tongue, and scrubs it with a brush] This batch is for the county dog food contest.

Muriel

Some therapist she is. If only we had someone here who could really help.

Muriel

I guess the only thing I can see without my glasses is Eustace's big shiny head.

Muriel

[seeing the Mona Lisa on the wall] Look! There she is. The most famous painting in the world. All because of her mysterious smile. I want to get a picture of me and the Mona Lisa.

Muriel

I want to see Mona one more time.

Muriel

How lovely. She's becoming a garden. From making stars above, to making flowers on the Earth. Now that's the mystery of life it is.

Muriel

Courage, what big lungs you have.

[parks his truck with Muriel and Courage in tow] This looks like a crummy place to end a crummy vacation. [Thunder and lightning makes Courage scream and clings to Eustace. The family enters the lobby. The latter taps a service bell on the front desk thrice]

Katz

Welcome to the Katz Motel. I'm Katz. Would you please sign in? No dogs allowed.

Courage

But... but... [whines as Eustace brings him outside]

Muriel

Oh my...

[Ties Courage's leash to a pole] KABOOM!!! [laughs, Muriel wacks him in the head with her purse] What did I do? Stupid dog.

Muriel

Oh, Courage, don't worry, it's only for a short time. [kisses Courage before walking away] Goodnight, Courage.

Courage

Maybe a goodnight for you. You'll be in a warm bed.

[scratches his back] Can't wait to sleep in my own bed. Muriel. You hear me? (removes a part of the blanket to sit on the bed) Eh, what do you know? (lays on the bed and covers himself while mumbling quietly) ....bed... Ah. (starts snoring)

Muriel

[getting dressed; sarcastic] What a fine way to end a vacation.

Katz

[reads a book while Courage struggles to win] Hmm, how lovely.

Muriel

[searches for Eustace in the bedroom] Now where's that man gone to?

Katz

[walks over to Courage, looking down as he cracks his own head twice] Now you're going to learn why nobody ever checks out of the Katz Motel. [wraps his hand around Courage's throat and starts to laugh evilly as he pulls out a spider. Courage howls with fear and Katz is knocked out with a racket by Muriel as he drops the spider, which scurries away]

Muriel

Come on, Courage. We're leaving. The service here stinks. [The scene cuts to Muriel driving the family home, as Eustace is still sleeping while wrapped up in webs] That's a fancy blanket grandpa has on. Maybe we should get you one. [Courage screams]

Muriel

Eustace, will you stop that noise?! You'll wake the neighbors!

We ain't got no neighbors!

Dr. Vindaloo

Hmm, there's nothing to worry about. It's nothing at all. Nothing at all. The swelling is going to go down. To go down. Just keep soaking it. There's nothing to worry about. Just keep soaking it.

Muriel

[Courage stammers] Now, now, I don't want to be any trouble.

Then you shouldn't have gotten bit. Come on, you stupid dog.

Muriel

Thank you, doctor.

Dr. Vindaloo

Just keep soaking it.

Muriel, you're missing your favorite show! Muriel! [grumbles; to Courage] Go find her.

Courage

Ahhhhh!