And I thought I'd performed the perfect murder.
Perfect murder, sir? Oh, I'm sorry. There's no such thing as a perfect murder. That's just an illusion.
All S1
S1 E15Unfinished Business
CCCharles Clay
Isn't the police always called in when there's any possibility of an accident?
Accident? Oh, I'm sure it's just an accident. Don't worry just because I'm from homicide. Didn't I mention that? Well, never mind.
CCCharles Clay
There on 24 hours duty. I simply could not have returned without them seeing me.
Yes sir, I guess that's all true and that guard, he certainly remembers what time you left just like I told you he did. But that's exactly what's been bothering me right from the beginning-- time. Ever since I saw that beautiful watch of yours. Time. Why would you check with the guard when you were leaving the island, the time? He's got a drugstore watch. Unless you wanted to make certain when you were leaving he would remember...
SMSgt. Mac Albinsky
The time.
You think she was murdered, don't you?
I, I beg your pardon, sir?
You heard me.
Yes sir, I did. Uh, I mean, yes, I do think it was a premeditated killing, sir. I mean I think the robbery was staged to cover up the murder. Um, how did you know, sir?
Why else would you be here?
It could be just a routine check, sir.
No, Lieutenant. They don't send a police detective stumbling around, asking silly, fake, innocent questions on a routine check. I know that from my show.
Silly, fake, innocent questions, like what, sir?
[to Fowler] Brilliant, sir! I'm very impressed! No wonder you solve more crimes than I do, sir.
The parka and the ski mask, that's where they both came from.
And the gun?
Oh, come on, sir. You're putting me on. You know that guns don't come from the wardrobe department.
Of course. How stupid of me.
No, that's the prop department, sir, not the wardrobe department. How does a smart man like Lt. Lucerne make a mistake like that?
Because you're not talking to Lt. Lucerne at the moment, are you, Lieutenant? You're talking to Ward Fowler.
Well, what's the difference, sir?
The difference is Ward Fowler is under suspicion of murder and a man under that kind of threat is apt to make mistakes, he's apt to get rattled.
Well, whoever said anything about Ward Fowler being under suspicion of murder?
Lt. Lucerne did.
He did?
There were no prints on the gun because you wiped the gun clean, sir. But there is a reason the lab report took so long. You remembered to clean the gun, but you didn't remember to do the same thing with the bullets.
Damn! I had to forget something. That's always how the third act ends.
JBJanie Brandt
Aunt Ruth, he was in the Army, he can handle a gun, and he's the only one who was willing to work for that salary.
SMSergeant Miller
See something, sir?
Yeah. His watch is wrong. My watch cost $30. His must have cost a couple hundred and it's wrong. It says May 1st. Goes to show you money doesn't buy quality.
OOfficer
Lieutenant, it is May 1st. Your watch is wrong. His watch is right.
Oh. Well, what do you expect for $30?
[in a hair salon] Excuse me. Darryl?
DDarryl
Yes? A challenge! But I'll do my best. Sit please, please.
Uh, no, actually I just wanted to ask a few questions.
DDarryl
Oh. Don't sue. Just wear a hat and never let him cut it again.
No, sir, uh... [looking in mirror] Is it that bad?
DDarryl
Um, yes, yes. Now that's all the questions I have time for. Next!
PBPhyllis Brandt
Alright, Lieutenant. Examine me.
No, no. Uh, look, Mrs. Brandt. It's a very tragic thing. If you ever feel faint while I'm asking you questions you'll let me know-- I mean the last thing I want to do is upset you.
PBPhyllis Brandt
[starts crying] Oh no! No! [she gets up and starts walking away]
[getting up and following her] I'm sorry! [steps on the hem of her dress, ripping it, causing her to turn and stare at him] Well, thank you, Mrs. Brandt. That's all the questions for today.
PBPhyllis Brandt
Thank you.
PBPhyllis Brandt
A search warrant! I have never been so insulted! Never! What's it look like?
I'm sorry, Mrs. Brandt. I thought the investigation warranted it.
PBPhyllis Brandt
I'll have you disbarred for this, whatever the hell that word is.
Yes, ma'am. Fired I think is the word you want.
PBPhyllis Brandt
Worse than that! You will never get another job, not in this city, not in this state, not in any police force in this country! I am not without certain influence, Lt. Columbus!
Well, what do you know. Here I am talking with some of the smartest people in the world, and I didn't even notice!
SSuzy
Hi. I'm Suzy
GCGeorge Campanella
Hi Suzy.
SSuzy
I've tried Esalen, primal scream, pyramid power, Synanon, a black mass in San Francisco, open marriage, est, TA, TM, I'm OK, You're OK... and I'm still a target.
SSuzy
I like the way you wear your hair!
...oh, thank you very much, ma'am, I like the way you wear yours.
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