Cobra Kai quotes

Miguel

Hey, I just wanted to say thank you.

Johnny

Alright, well, you said it.

Miguel

So last night, was that, like, tae kwon do, or Jiu-Jitsu, or MMA, or something?

Johnny

It's karate. Old school karate.

Miguel

Do you think you could teach me?

Johnny

What? No.

Miguel

What? Come on, when school starts, those guys are gonna make my life miserable.

Johnny

It's not my problem.

Miguel

If I just knew a little bit of what you knew then I would be--

Johnny

Forget it! I don't do karate anymore! All right? Besides, I need to find a job.

Miguel

Well, you can open your own karate school.

Johnny

It's called a dojo.

Miguel

Well, you could open your own dojo.

Johnny

Look, I'm not getting into this with you, all right? I'm not even sure I'm allowed to be around kids right now.

Wait, is this the karate guy? The guy from the tournament?

Oh, this is the guy whose ass you kicked.

Daniel

It was a really close match. But, if you want to get technical, I kicked his face. [Chuckles] I'm just busting your chops.

Johnny

It was an illegal kick.

Daniel

Oh, illegal? Really? Come on, what about that elbow to my knee?

Johnny

Yeah, I got a warning. You got the win.

Johnny

Cobra Kai isn't just about karate. It's about a way of life. [Points to wall with "Strike First Strike Hard No Mercy" written on it] Take that first lesson. Striking first is the initial step towards victory. Okay, like when you're at a party, and you see a hot babe. You don't wait for some other guy to go talk to her first, do you?

Miguel

I mean, I've never been to a party, so...

Johnny

Big surprise. Alright, look, striking first is about being aggressive. Alright? If you're not aggressive, then you're being a pussy. And you don't wanna be a pussy! You wanna have balls!

Miguel

Don't you think you're doing a lot of genderizing?

Johnny

...what?

Miguel

Oh, sorry. Don't you think you're doing a lot of genderizing, sensei?

Johnny

No, what the hell are you talking about?

Miguel

Oh, uh, my guidance counselor says that certain words can perpetuate the sexist world view that can trigger-

Johnny

QUIET! From now on, you won't listen to your guidance counselor, you're gonna listen to me! Is that understood?

Miguel

Uh, yes, sensei.

Daniel

Some things never change.

Johnny

Yeah? What are you talking about?

Daniel

I heard you beat up a bunch of teenagers in that parking lot out there.

Johnny

Oh, that. No, I didn't beat up any teenagers. I kicked the shit out of a bunch of assholes who deserved it.

Daniel

Wow. Johnny Lawrence calling someone else an asshole. That's rich, man.

Johnny

Yeah, what's that supposed to mean?

Daniel

Alright, look. I'm not here to rehash the past. Just stay away from my daughter's friends.

Johnny

Your daughter's friends? Yeah, that makes sense. Nice company she keeps.

Daniel

What the hell is that supposed to mean?

Johnny

It means those friends of hers were wailing on a kid half their size. Maybe you don't know your daughter as well as you think you do. Get your house in order, LaRusso.

Daniel

Who the hell do you think you're talking to?

Miguel

Bathroom's clean! [walks into the scene] Is there anything else you need me to do?

Miguel

I'm sorry, Sensei. I...

Daniel

Sensei? Really? Oh my god. [To Miguel] Kid, I don't know what he's told you, but you shouldn't believe a word this guy says, or you're gonna end up just like him. [Back to Johnny] You and I, this...we're not done.

Miguel

I wish I could show my mom what I did to those boards, but if she knew where I was right now, she'd kill me. What's wrong with you?

Johnny

[After reading "Final Notice" bills] Nothing. Put your costume on, I'm driving you to that dance, and we're gonna pick up some more students. [Sees Miguel's horribly homemade halloween costume] What the hell is that?

Miguel

It's my halloween costume. My ya-ya made it. It started off as Deadpool, then I think it was Spider-Man, and then it just kinda became some generic superhero.

Johnny

Yeah, a poor one at that. You're Poor-Man.

Miguel

Yeah.

Johnny

Well, I can't let you go out like that. We have a reputation to uphold.

Miguel

What do you suggest?

Daniel

What do you think you're doing?

Johnny

I'm promoting my business. Why don't you try minding yours?

Daniel

Minding mine? You know what, look, this is ridiculous, okay? We can both be adults here. I just don't know why you'd ever wanna bring back Cobra Kai after what your sensei did to you.

Johnny

Because I'm not Kreese...and the lessons worked.

Daniel

"Strike first, no mercy?" Real good lessons. If you think I'm gonna let you fill these kids heads with that garbage, you're nuts, man.

Miguel Diaz

My mom says I can train again.

Johnny Lawrence

She did?

Miguel Diaz

Yeah. I mean, if we still have a dojo.

Johnny Lawrence

We do for now. All right, but I need to know are you ready to take things to the next level?

Miguel Diaz

Yes, Sensei.

Johnny Lawrence

You got your ass kicked because you didn't have any defense. So I'm gonna teach you the best defense that you can know. And the best defense- [holds up his fists to Miguel's face] -is more offense.

I'm ready for your lame-ass karate this time!

Miguel

It's not lame-ass karate. [Blocks punch from Kyler] It's Cobra Kai. [Punches Kyler in the face.]

Daniel

Hey, Mr. Miyagi. I know it's been a few months, but better late than never, right? I've been thinking about you a lot lately. I, um... You know, it's... it's funny. When I was a kid, you seemed to always have all the answers, and I guess I thought when I got older, I'd have it all figured out too. But now I just... feel like I'm clueless. Makes me wonder, was it different for you, or were you just better at hiding it? Maybe that was it, huh? [trims part of bonsai tree] I feel like lately I've let my anger take control. You know me, I've always been a bit of a hothead, so... I really wish you could be here right now.

Daniel-san. You remember lesson about balance?

Daniel

[remembers lesson] Yeah.

Mm. Lesson not just karate only. Lesson for whole life. Whole life. Have balance. Everything be better. Understand?

Daniel

[in present] Yeah. I understand.

Johnny Lawrence

Since you joined Cobra Kai, I have been hard on you. I've called you names, I've humiliated you - some of you, I've hit. And for that, I don't apologize. Cobra Kai is about strength. If you can't be strong on the inside, you can't be strong on the outside. And right now - you're all weak. And I know that because I was you. I used to have no friends, I used to be the weird kid. Well, maybe not that weird, I still hooked up with babes 'n all but the point is - I wasn't always the badass Sensei that I am today. Just like a cobra, I had to shed my loser skin to find my true power. And you guys will too.

Johnny Lawrence

Welcome to Cobra Kai.

Miguel

Eli... what happened?

I'm flippin' the script.

Johnny Lawrence

Wait, are you the kid with the lip? Nice cut, bro! You see that? It doesn't matter if you're a loser, or a nerd, or a freak. All that matters is that You... Become... Badass! "Hawk" - fall in.

Johnny

Fear does not exist in this dojo, does it?

No, Sensei!

Johnny

Pain does not exist in this dojo, does it?

Aisha Robinson

No, Sensei!

Johnny

Defeat does not exist in this dojo, does it?

Miguel

No, Sensei!

Johnny

Class! Are you ready to learn the 'Way of the Fist'?

Yes, Sensei!

Johnny Lawrence

Look, I admit Cobra Kai had its share of problems in the '80s. My sensei didn't always play by the rules. That's why I left. But my Cobra Kai is different. It's a place where kids can come and feel like they belong. Where they won't get picked on because they're a bunch of losers, or because they're unique. I've watched firsthand as my students have gotten stronger, gained confidence, or had to stand up for themselves. Cobra Kai is making a difference to these kids' lives. And honestly, they're making a difference in mine as well. Thank you.

Miguel Diaz

[toasts] To Cobra Kai.

Johnny Lawrence

Never accept defeat.

Johnny

You've trained hard. You've gotten stronger, tougher, faster. You've done your best! You're ready for this tournament! Am I right?

Yes, Sensei!

Johnny

WRONG! (he crushes his beer can & throws it) Your best ain't shit! If you wanna win the All-Valley Under 18 Karate Tournament, you gotta give me better than your best! Which is why, from now on, you're gonna be getting my worst! Do you understand?!

Yes, Sensei!

Johnny

Are you losers?

No, Sensei!

Johnny

Are you nerds?

No, Sensei!

Johnny

Are you sure?

No, Sensei!

Johnny

It was the summer of '82. Rocky III had just come out. My buddy Dutch was a huge Mr. T fan, so we went to a local theater to check it out. Sitting in front of us was this group of cute chicks, eating popcorn, and Dutch started throwing Milk Duds at 'em.

Miguel

What? Why would he do that?

Johnny

'Cause, it's an alpha move, man. Chicks love it when you treat 'em like crap. Anyway, eventually the girls got so pissed off one of 'em stood up and started yelling at us. That's when I saw her for the first time.

Miguel

Saw who?

Johnny

Ali.

Amanda LaRusso

What is going on?

Anthony LaRusso

Dad's about to fight this guy!

Daniel LaRusso

Amanda, please, just go inside. This is between me and Sensei Lawrence.

Amanda LaRusso

Yeah, you two seem to have this pretty well in hand. Just a normal Saturday afternoon, a couple of grown men about to kick each other into a pool. You know, as much as I would love to watch you and your childhood karate rival duke it out, I kinda don't wanna get any blood on the patio, so what do you say we try to resolve this over some breakfast instead?

Daniel LaRusso

Want to go inside?

Johnny Lawrence

I could eat.