Erin Lindsay quotes from Chicago P.D.

Lindsay

I didn't think a 70 pound girl could lift a grown woman like that. But see, I knew I couldn't call 911 for help 'cause then CPS would take me from you. Yeah, I dragged you into the bathtub. Kept filling it with ice cubes. Just sitting there hoping you didn't die.

Bunny

Do we really have to bring up all this negative stuff?

Lindsay

I was nine. And do you know what you said to me when you woke up? "Get my cigarettes."

Lindsay

You're sleeping with her.

Halstead

What? No.

Lindsay

You are a horrible liar.

Halstead

We played Scrabble, like, once at her apartment.

Platt

Got word from headquarters. You're both up for mandatory firearms requalification. Get to the shooting range by Friday.

Halstead

Now, remind me, 'cause I'm drawing a blank here. Who was it that had the most shots in the black the last time we requalified?

Lindsay

I believe the operative words here are "last time".

Halstead

Do you think maybe they'll just let me turn in Dryer's knee for requalification? You know, just put the X-ray in my file. Bam. Done. Requalified.

Lindsay

[scoffs] Yeah, yeah. How much?

Halstead

On this? How much you got?

Lindsay

C-note.

Halstead

You're on.

Halstead

[about Voight being late for work] He had the flu last year.

Lindsay

No, he didn't. That was you.

Halstead

He gets sick. Everybody gets sick.

Halstead

Look, whatever we got to do to come across convincingly in there? I'm prepared.

Lindsay

So noble.

Halstead

Okay, I'm kind of tripping right now.

Lindsay

What?

Halstead

This is a sex club. People have sex inside.

Lindsay

[discussing a suspect's background check] Not even a parking ticket.

Halstead

So, aside from operating a heroin lab, he's also a Boy Scout.

Halstead

You wanted a goodbye hug.

Lindsay

That is not what I'm saying.

Halstead

Hey, it's okay to admit that you're losing sleep without a goodbye hug.

Lindsay

I need to tell you something.

Halstead

You're married?

Ruzek

Listen, we... [writes something on a post-it note and sticks it to his coffee mug] We're thinking about putting together a task force on how to make coffee.

Dawson

Maybe you can help us arrange a press conference for that.

Ruzek

I got you started. Cream, two sugars. It's real simple.

Lindsay

I am not gonna make you coffee. [to Halstead] Come on, what about you?

Halstead

[laughs] I wasn't going to say anything. And then Lang called and he said you left your pant suit at the headquarters.

Halstead

I'm not really a sneak-around- behind-dad's-back kind of guy.

Lindsay

Says the guy that works undercover.

Halstead

[laughs] Let's just come clean. Voight will respect us more if we look him in the eye.

Halstead

Couldn't sleep the other night. So I was up watching TV, and I saw this doctor talking about commitment phobia. He was saying it had to do with family patterns and survival instincts. I'm just saying, you know, Bunny's been married, what, five times?

Lindsay

Don't try to psychoanalyze me, Jay. Have you given any more thought to whether or not we should tell Voight?

Halstead

No, we're not telling Voight.

Lindsay

He pardoned Burgess and Ruzek.

Halstead

Burgess was shot. Her and Ruzek are an exception to the rule. Do you want to take a bullet so that Voight will give his blessing?

Lindsay

I'd take a bullet just to come over to your house tonight. [raises eyebrows]

Halstead

[grins] What part of your body would you sacrifice?

Lindsay

Uh Shoulder? Fleshy part of the thigh.

Halstead

Now I feel special.

Lindsay

You should.

Lindsay

This is in Wisconsin?

Halstead

Yeah. Great fishing. Musky. Largemouth.

Lindsay

Mosquitoes? Like birds.

Halstead

But it's a great place to retire.

Lindsay

I'm not living in Northern Wisconsin.

Halstead

[grins teasingly] I don't remember asking you.

Lindsay

Antonio, would you ever live in Northern Wisconsin?

Dawson

Yeah. Snowmobiling, ice fishing, meth labs. It's paradise.

Halstead

You're not helping.

Halstead

[laughs as Ruzek is being tasered] That was worth the price of admission.

[looks at Halstead] You're next. [Halstead's smile disappears]

Atwater

[goads Halstead] Come on, man.

Lindsay

I volunteer to tase him.

Halstead

Okay, I mean, this doesn't seem, like, official enough.

Lindsay

Where do you want it? [smirks] S, P, A or G?

Halstead

Shoulders.

Dawson

G!

Atwater

[laughs] G!

Halstead

[glares at Lindsay] Don't you dare.