Kitty Walker quotes from Brothers &amp; Sisters

Look, I love you guys more than anything in the whole world, and I've been doing a lot of thinking over the last few days. I can't just sit here and let these people tear apart my family like this. God, Kitty, they almost killed you.

Kitty

No, Justin, I'm fine, I'm here now, it's okay.

I know, okay, but the same thing could happen tomorrow, or they could do something even worse. It's just not right.

Justin, what's the matter?

Nothing's the matter... I enlisted today.

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Kitty

So I have an interview with Senator McCallister but then when I come back I'd love to help.

Oh Kitty, sweetie-pie I don't know how to say this delicately but I'm not cremating anything.

Kitty

You know I am an excellent cook, in fact some people even call me a chef.

Some with a really good sense of humor.

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So wait, we're not having Christmas? Well, that sucks!

We are having Christmas and Hanukkah. Both. Bells, whistles, latkas, ornaments, carols, the works.

Kitty

I think it's great. I think it's great that we're finally embracing our multiculturalism. Uncle Saul will be in heaven. Wait a minute, Martha Stewart has Hanukkah recipes?

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Kitty

We talked twice, once on camera for about, probably twenty minutes. I don't even buy shoes without walking around in them longer than that.

You see these shoes? I bought them on the Internet. Sight unseen, never had a problem. I'm a very good judge of quality, Ms. Walker, and of how things are going to fit.

Kitty

Did you just compare me to shoes?

You started it.

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OK. Whatever, where did you hide the wine? I need to get grandma a drink ASAP?

Tommy

It's in the closet.

Kitty

You put the wine in my closet.

[Kevin walks over to the closet & opens the door]

Kitty

Is your little boyfriend in there? [Laughs]

[Yelling from closet] He's not my boyfriend!

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[Kitty and Robert enter a closet]

If this is where you keep the wine, where do you keep your clothes?

Kitty

Shut your mouth and come on. Shut the door.

[Robert shuts the door and looks around]

I am having like a fifth grade flashback of Deena Segerson and seven minutes in heaven.

[He looks at Kitty who is pouring glasses of wine]

Have you always been a closet drinker?

Kitty

Are you done?

No, I'll think of some more.

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Kitty

We had to promise no wine when we took Justin out of rehab.

IIda

Out of where?

Kitty

Oh.

Mother, Justin is in a rehab program. He's a drug addict.

Oh, mom, a little more discretion. We are in the presence of a US senator.

It's nothing to be embarrassed about.

But homosexuality is?

Kitty

Oh Kevin, you know. Please, enough. Can you just tell him you have a gay brother too.

IIda

Who's gay?

Kitty

I...

I think you just outed two brothers for the price of one.

Thanks Kitty. That would be me, grandma. I'm gay.

IIda

You're not gay. Justin maybe, but you?

Oh I am gay, I swear. I am.

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Kitty

You know tonight was unusually bizarre, even for my family.

Are you kidding me, it's been fantastic... [pause] like dinner theatre or the circus.

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Kitty

[Kitty calls Sarah] You are never going to believe this. I slept with McCallister.

Oh God, Kitty, you scared me. I thought something bad had happened.

Kitty

Something bad did happen. Do you understand that I work for him? He is my boss!

Oh please, sleeping with co-workers is like a reflex for you.

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If you're gonna ask me something, you should just ask it.

Kitty

Senator, are you running for President?

Yes, I am, Miss Walker. You know what else? I'm gonna win.

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Kitty

I've got to make Hair Boy look Presidential.

Senator Hair Boy, please.

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Kitty

[Robert opens the front door to find Nora and Justin lurking] Mom! What are you doing?

Nothing, nothing. I just got here and found Justin here lurking...

I wasn't lurking.

Then why didn't you go in?

Because Kitty was yelling at the senator, Mom.

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Kitty

I liked you so much better when you were stupid.

You're stupid.

Kitty

You're stupid.

You're stupider.

Kitty

You're the stupidest.

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Hold on to what's good. What makes you happy.

Kitty

You make me happy.

I do?

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There's something odd about this.

Kitty

This what?

This town.

Kitty

Oh, was the giant man-made artichoke in the town square your first clue?

No, though that was odd.