Boy Meets World quotes

406 total quotes



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Season 5
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Feeny: Is that the stupid idea train coming around the bend?

Feeny: Nebraska, Mr. Hunter. Nebraska!
Shawn: The 75th State! Major Export: Tortillas!

Feeny: Now, why didn't I see that?
Eric: Well, Mr. Feeny, I'm in college. You're still in high school.

Feeny: THAT'S ENOUGH! Now, this class will not be more interested in the romantic goings-on of its students than it is with whatever the hell I'm teaching!
(the lights come up to reveal someone has thrown a pencil through Kenny's head. Kenny drops to the floor, the pencil leaving a line on the wall as he goes down)

Feeny: We'll return to The Young and the Restless right after this word from Feeny. And the word is...Shut up.

Jack: (standing over the bodies of Eric and 'Feffy') Eric! Feffy. Eric! Oh, he was my friend! My roommate! I didn't really know her.

Jack: [about Shawn's room] So when people throw garbage down the chute, this is where it winds up, huh?
Shawn: Are you calling me a pig?
Jack: A pig would never live in here.
Shawn: Oh, yeah?
[Shawn moves a curtain covering a closet to reveal a big black pig.]

Jack: He paid half the rent! Now I can't afford to live in my apartment anymore! Wait...if I can't afford to live in my apartment anymore then I don't want to live!
(Runs to window almost jumping out)

Jack: Hey. I didn't hear you come in last night. Must've had a pretty good time with your date, huh?
Eric: Evening began at seven. Started with some intimate pre-dinner conversation at a quaint little Mexican place I happen to know. Came back here and... let's just say my clothes were off within five minutes. [sips coffee]
Jack: You opened your big mouth, she walked out. You ate alone at Taco Bell, came home, took off all your clothes and were asleep by eight 'o'clock.
Eric: How'd you do?
Jack: Not as good.

Jack: I'm just uncomfortable picking up girls.
Eric: Watch and learn. [gets very close to Jack's face with a weird smile]
Jack: What are you doing?
Eric: I'm loving you with my eyes.
Jack: Please don't.

Jack: This whole Valentine's Day thing is one big scam. The greeting card companies, the candy stores, all trying to rip off the innocent consumer.
Eric: No date, huh?

Jack: We usually go to the Val d'Isère and see the French Alps.
Shawn: Those of us in the trailer park just like to thank God for all that we have this time of year.
Jack: We pray on the plane.

Lauren: Those slopes are treacherous.
Feeny: He fell getting off the bus.
Lauren: Those buses are treacherous.

Professor Michaels: Free will. Wanna take a shot?
Shawn: Do I really have a choice?
Professor Michaels: Ooh, gotta take five.

Schneider: Sometimes I get shy. People who aren't shy make me nervous.