“L”
In this episode: Smart Butt-head (28), Smart Beavis (28)
[A man looks angrily towards the camera]
Hey, hey! Quit looking at me like that! You wanna fight?!
You always like, talk tough in front of the TV set but if that dude was really here, you'd be a total wuss.
No way, Butt-head! I'd take him on.
No you wouldn't! You'd be going like [Mocks Beavis's voice] Yeah...huh huh huh...yeah...huh huh huh.
Yeah. [snickers] Yeah.
Is that that Christian Slater dude?
Yeah. It's like "Christians? Later, dude."
Beavis, quit trying to be funny. It never works.
Whoa! This part of the song sucks. It's like, that other part is pretty cool, but it's like, they go into all these different parts, and most of them suck.
If they could just stick to that one part that's cool, you know? Not play the stuff that, like, sucks, and uh, you know, then like, you know, we'd all be like, you know, we'd all be a little better.
You've got time, but you ain't got time for me...
Look at him! He's saying his dad doesn't have time for him.
Aww! Aww! He ain't got time for me!
He's practically crying.
Aww! That's too bad.
Live, I Alone
Uhh, I think this dude is checking you out, Beavis.
No he's not! Liar.
Yeah he is. He's like, "I like what I see. I'll be right over."
Shut up, Butt-head! He can't see me, because he's just looking at the camera, he's in the video.
Remember that time that dude was saying that stuff to you at the bus station?
Shut up, Butt-head!
He said, "I like what I see. Now why don't you go into one of those stalls and I'll meet you there."
Shut up, Butt-head! At least I got a candy bar out of the deal.
Yeah.
Who the hell is this buttmunch?! What's going on here?
What's with all these faces he's making? He's like, trying to be scary and all heavy and intense and stuff.
Who's this other guy, that keeps, like, trying to get in front of him?
I think he's just some jackass that wandered on the set. Maybe he's like, the drummer, and like, they got there and they said "Where are your drums?" and he's like, "Uhh, I thought they were in the van."
And they're like, "You mean you didn't bring your drums?"
And they said "Okay, it's your own fault. You're gonna have to wander around like a buttmunch for the whole video."
Yeah, yeah. And then he said "Okay, that's okay with me, yeah. I can do that."
What a jack-butt-munch-ass-dumb-butt.
Look at that little braid thing on the back of his head.
Yeah, it's like, one of those dolls, where you pull the string, and they, like, talk and stuff.
That would be a cool doll if you had, like, this little bald dude without a shirt, and you, like, pull a string on the back of his head and he just starts shouting at you. And then it could wet its pants.
Lordz of Brooklyn, Saturday Night Fever
[sings] American Woman!
They think they're bad cause they're walking slow.
[a heavy-set man with a mustache has the caption "Scotty"]
Check it out, Scotty. [imitates Scotty] Captain, she's breaking up! We can't hold out much longer! Get out your seat and jump around! Jump around!
[also imitating Scotty] Get out your seat and jump around. Jump around.
These guys are like, it's like they're trying to be House of Pain.
Yeah. And the Beastie Boys, and uh, Goodfellas...
And Resavore Dogs.
You know, if these dudes were as cool as they think they are, they'd be hanging out with chicks on a Saturday night.
Yeah, yeah, really. Or at least, like, watching TV or something. I wonder where these guys get these clothes?
Uh, you can get them at this place called Buy George down at the mall.
No way, really? Cool.
Who are these guys, anyway?
Uh, the Lordz of Brooklyn.
I thought there was only one Lord. That's what they said in Sunday school.
You're thinking of, like, outer space, Beavis. That's where the lord lives.
G. Love & Special Sauce, Cold Beverage
I've seen this video before. It sucks.
Wow! You know, I was just thinking the same thing, then you said it! You must, like, read minds or something.
Uh, yeah, I can do that. I have, like, ESP...N.
Whoa, really? That's cool.
Yeah. I knew you were gonna say that.
Wow. So what am I gonna say next?
You're gonna say "Yeah, huh huh huh huh"
Yeah, heh heh. Wow! You did it again. That's cool!
I knew you were gonna say that, too.
Okay, let's try it one more time. I'm gonna think about something.
Okay...ummm....mmmm...dammit Beavis! [slaps Beavis several times]
Cut it out, butthole!
Don't ever think about that again.
Wow, this is really cool. Okay, let me do it now. You think of something.
Okay.
Um...are you thinking about...is it some flies?
No.
Is it a suitcase of some kind?
No.
Are you thinking you're gonna smack me?
No, but that's not a bad idea. [slaps Beavis several times]
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Beavis and Butt-Head pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
