Michael Garibaldi quotes from Babylon 5

Stephen Franklin

Well, anyone willing to command Babylon 5 has got to be slightly insane, but I don't think that you're ready for the asylum just yet.

John Sheridan

I prefer to be only slightly insane.

Garibaldi

Don't we all.

This is quite irregular, Mr. Garibaldi! I was assured that Captain Sheridan or Commander Ivanova would be available!

Michael Garibaldi

They got called away on urgent business.

What kind of business?

Garibaldi

I'm not authorized for that kind of information.

But...you're the head of Security.

Garibaldi

And what kind of head of Security would I be if I let people like me know things that I'm not supposed to know? [I mean,] I know what I know because I have to know it, and if I don't have to know it, I don't tell me, and I don't let anyone else tell me, either. Now look, we've tried most of the other ambassadors. Why don't you speak to G'Kar? Maybe he knows something about this ship.

Under the terms of our recent treaty, I am not authorized to have any official conversation with the Narn without Centauri approval.

Garibaldi

So you'll ask unofficially. And I can give you reasonable assurances that the head of Security will not report you for doing so.

[slowly] Because you won't tell yourself about it.

Garibaldi

I try never to get involved in my own life. Too much trouble.

[confused] This is a very strange place you have here, Mr. Garibaldi.

Garibaldi

Thank you.

Garibaldi

May I be the first to say that this is the nuttiest idea you've ever had.

Susan Ivanova

Thank you.

Zack Allan

I look like I'm wearing a circus tent! Any minute now, a little teeny car with 16 clowns in it is gonna come flying out my butt!

Michael Garibaldi

Garibaldi's Fashion Express. Go.

G'Kar

I told you I could help. The Book of G'Quan. Read it. We'll talk afterwards.

Garibaldi

I don't read Narn.

G'Kar

[walking away from Garibaldi's quarters] Learn!

Michael Garibaldi

And after that, there are only two options. He turns us in, we're court-martialled, then shot for treason. Or we kill him, before he has a chance to tell anybody.

Stephen Franklin

I will not support murder. We can not kill him.

Ivanova

Can we wound him? Just a little?

Bester

Liars are always afraid that somebody's going to see through them. So I just provided him with a vehicle for his paranoia. Your captain's opinions notwithstanding, the badge and the uniform do have certain...advantages.

Garibaldi

Like intimidation?

Bester

Absolutely! Just like...your badge, and...your uniform.

Bester

If I had my talent working, I could've warned you when he was coming.

Garibaldi

And if I had a baseball bat, we could hang you from the ceiling and play piñata. I still think I should've gone straight to G'Kar.

Bester

We have no evidence that he made the sale yet. Why annoy the Narn without cause if we are wrong? Shut off the problem at the source and the rest attends to itself. A piñata, huh? So you think of me as something bright and cheerful, full of toys and candy for young children. Thank you. That makes me feel…much better about our relationship.

Marcus

Well thank you, Mr. Garibaldi, one of the leading minds of the 14th century. "Have we no workhouses? Have we no prisons?" Mr. Marley here'd like to have a word with you! He's the fellow in the chains! Ignore the moans, it's just gas!

Michael Garibaldi

Don't you ever shut up?

Marcus

Not until I get what I want. Why? Do you think silent meditation would work better?

Garibaldi

Ivanova was right. You are a pain in the ass.

Michael Garibaldi

You know, I've been stuck in this tin can for three years. I haven't taken a vacation--okay, okay, it's my fault, I had the leave coming, I just didn't take it. And the pay sucks, I knew that when I signed on! And nobody said I'd survive the job! Now, I give you all that. But where in my contract does it say that I have to eat the same food for breakfast every day for three years?

John Sheridan

[matter-of-fact] Paragraph 47, Subsection 19, Clause 9A. You can find it in the index under S.U.A.E.I.

Garibaldi

S.U...A.E.I.?

[in unison] Shut Up And Eat It.

Sheridan

This is Captain John J. Sheridan. Serial number XO7Y39-Alpha. Security code: obsidian.

Ivanova

This is Commander Susan Ivanova. Serial number Z48M27-Epsilon. Security code: griffin.

Michael Garibaldi

This is Chief Warrant Officer Michael Garibaldi. Serial number V17L98. Security code: peekaboo.

Ivanova

Peekaboo?

Garibaldi

Would you have guessed it?

Sheridan

When you were hurt, when you were in my arms, I was ready to kill that guy with my bare hands. I realized I have never told you how much I cared about you, how much you mean to me. I think it's time you knew that. I can no longer imagine my world without you in it. I don't know exactly when or how it happened. But I'm glad it did.

Garibaldi

No one knows, but…I'm afraid all the time…what I might do if I let go.

Ivanova

I think I…loved…Talia.

Dr. Stephen Franklin

I…think I have a problem.

Michael Garibaldi

What are you so nervous about? We went up against the entire Earth Alliance and two carrier groups.

Yeah, but this is the post office. This could get us in real trouble.

Stephen Franklin

You know, as a Foundationist, I was always taught that if you're not careful, you can lose yourself in the world. You get too busy with things, not busy enough with yourself! Spend your days and nights living someone else's agendas, fighting someone else's battles, and you're doing the work you're supposed to be doing, but every day there's less and less of you in it all! Till one day, you come to a fork in the road, and because you're distracted, you're not thinking. You lose yourself. You go right, and the rest of you, the really important part of you, goes left! And you don't even know you've done it till you realize, you finally realize, that you don't have any idea who you are when you're not doing all those things!

Michael Garibaldi

Stephen...you don't really believe there are two of you, do you?

Franklin

[chuckles] No, it's a metaphor! All right, there isn't literally another me walking around the station. But the principle is real! I realized I didn't have any idea who I was when I wasn't being a doctor, and I think I was using the stims to avoid facing that. Now I gotta fix it.

Garibaldi

How?

Franklin

By going walkabout. You just leave everything, and you start walking. I mean, the Foundation adopted the idea from the Aborigines back on Earth. The theory is, if you're separated from yourself, you start walking and you keep walking until you meet yourself. Then you sit down, and you have a long talk. Talk about everything that you've learned, everything that you've felt, and you talk until you've run out of words. Now, that's vital, because the real important things can't be said. And then, if you're lucky, you look up, and there's just you. Then you can go home.

Garibaldi

It's easy to fight when you've got a lot of ships to work with. The real crunch comes when you're down to almost nothing! Then you either play it safe and you probably lose it all, or you take a chance! After what we've been through with your people, Sheridan was crazy to send our pilots out to fight for your ship! They didn't want to go, they didn't want to get blown out of the sky and leave B5 defenseless, and they sure as hell didn't want to die! But they did it because Sheridan told them to do it and because it was right!

G'Kar

This time it is possible he could be wrong.

Garibaldi

Yeah, it's possible. But you don't follow an order because you know for sure it's gonna work out! You do what you're told! Because your CO has the moral authority that says, "You may not come back! But the cause is just and fair and necessary!" That's why Sheridan is out there, and damn it, that's where that cruiser should be, too! It's not Na'Kal's decision, G'Kar. He doesn't see the big picture--you do! So in my book, and your book, that makes it your responsibility! Deal with it!