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S1 E15

Auf Wiedersehen, Pet · Season 1, Episode 15

Dennis, Oz and others in “Unfinished Business”

Hey? Amarillo?

[Brushing his teeth] Aye. D'you like it? [Dennis joins the queue for the bathroom. Moxey and Neville are in front.]

Hey! [Bangs the door] Hurry up, Wayne, will you? There's a bloody queue out here, y'know.

Why do these places always just have one bog?

I've just been sayin' to Mox, he'll be all right with us, won't he? He's our mate, we've gotta look after 'im.

Well that's all very well for you to say. Technically I'm the employer.

Ah, that says a lot about where your mentality is, yer kna, Den.

[Goes back to his and Oz's room] What's that supposed to mean?

Well, what do yer think it means?

I don't know. You tell me what my mentality is.

Well, in a word, you see yerself as a gaffer, don't yer? Always have done.

[Walking past the door] That's a whole sentence.

[Shouts down the corridor] Hey, man! I'm sayin' this for your benefit, yer kna, tosspot! [He and Dennis follow Moxey into his and Bomber's room]

Yeah, all right...

Shut up, both of yer! [To Moxey] Look, I've got to handle this job legit, right?

[Cutting his toenails] But Ally's a crafty old bugger himself.

Well that's all the more reason, isn'it, why he doesn't want to bring any heat down by some petty infringement of the Employment Act! Look, I have to do their 715, stamp their ticket. Moxey's got neither. [To Moxey] Look, Moxey, if you're picked up, God forbid, they're going to ask me, yer kna, quite rightly, why I hired you without proper documentation. So when you talk about accessories, it won't be you lot, will it? Oh nah, it'll be yours truly who ends up in the clarts!

See what I mean about the gaffer's mentality?

Yeah, but he's right though, isn't he? I can't compromise him. It wouldn't be fair.

All right, all right. But does it not strike you lot as a bit ironic? All this setup, eh?

What?

[Spits out the toothpaste] Here we are, right. We're workin' for this bloke, whose reputation is, to say the least... dubious. I mean I kna all aboot Ally Fraser, yer kna. He's a heavy duty villain. But he's alreet, 'cos he's so bloody wrapped up by lawyers, accountants and legal loopholes, he couldn't give a monkey's chuff aboot the law, the Inland Revenue or nowt! And you're more worried aboot Moxey, who, I mean, yer kna, with all due respect, is just some lowlife punter! His only real fault is he gans through life thinkin' every day is Guy Fawkes' Night!

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