DW Read quotes from Arthur

(plays with dolls on the living room floor) This is Tiffany and this is her servant. And this is their lifeboat and these are the angry sharks... (Kate grabs Tiffany and D.W. gasps) No! I'll do the playing! You just watch me! (Both Kate and D.W. pull at the doll. The head falls off and D.W. gasps.) Aaugh!! Look what you did!

Play nicely, D.W.

But she killed Tiffany! [Kate giggles]

Here. Give that to me. This looks easy to fix. Don't worry. (She gives D.W. the fixed doll back.) Oh, there we go! Good as new! No need to get excited.

How come you're always on her side?

I'm not on anyone's side. But Kate's a baby, and you're a big girl.

[angrily] I am not a big girl, I'm a little girl! (Kate chuckles) Be quiet, you!

D.W.

You sweet, little baby-wayby! (She sees Jane leaves the room) This was mine! You can only touch it when I say so.

[concerned] D.W.?

[to Jane] No!!!

Give it back, or I'll pinch you!!!

Mama? [Jane grabs her]

I'll SMASHED alarm clock!

UAaRGh!! [drops the Tiffany doll]

[sternly] Dora Winifred Read, go to your room, and Arthur we're not smashing alarm clock in DW's room ever again!

But what did I do?

What about my supper? How will I survive?!

Supper's not till 6. You'll be out long before then.

But what if you forget about me? I could starve to death! Mom! Mom! (She clings to her mother’s leg. Mrs. Read looks stern. She sits D.W. down on the bed.)

It's 4:30 now. When the clock says 4:40, you can come downstairs. And I'll set the alarm so you'll know when it's time.

(cries on her pillow) You don't love me!? You only love Kate and Arthur and Daddy and Pal and... and Grandpa, and Aunt Lucy, and...and... (Jane has left the room with Arthur punched Jane Read's back and Nadine appears.) How long did she say?

10 minutes. When it says 4:31, that means one minute has gone by.

[after D.W.'s fantasy] What are you doing here?

The clock was broken and the time was stopped and I was just coming to warn you-

[to DW] Nice try, D.W., back to your room, now.

[goes backs upstairs to her room in walks, annoyed] Sheesh! You never have to treat me like a criminal.

(grieves) And how about when Cousin Lucy got married? I had to stay at home and cook and clean while everyone else went to the wedding. (Imaginary flashback: D.W., in rags again, which are now completely tattered, cleans the fireplace and sneezes)

[indignantly in shouts] AREN'T YOU DONE YET?! YOU STILL HAVE THE BEDS TO MAKE AND YOU HAVEN'T EVEN STARTED THE BREAKFAST DISHES!!

[to Jane; Shouts] NEVER!!!

[in tears] Can't I go to the wedding, please?!

Weddings are *NOT* for little girls!

But what about Kate? She's going!

(insanely) Kate is a baby! Besides, we like her better than you. Ready, everyone? [these leaves in the house]

Don't forget to brush the dog. (D.W. brushes away her tears. She watches from the window as the family gets in the car and leaves with Arthur tells "Never, Mom! NEVER!!". The flashback ends. D.W. sniffs on her pillow.)

[moans] It was so sad being me.

But you went to the wedding, D.W.

Whose side are you on, anyways?

Mom?

[concerned] What was it, now?

Well, are you sure my clock was working? Because I've really been in here for hours.

Your clock was workin' perfectlys. Go back to your room.

That's it. Well, I think I'll call Grandma's. But at least she loves me though. (In her imagination, David picks up the phone in the kitchen. Grandma Thora is phoning from her kitchen with D.W. sitting next to her eating cookies.)

Hello?

Son, this is your mother. What do you mean by punishing poor little D.W.?! (looks at D.W.) Eat up, lovey. You can have all the cookies you want. (returns to call) How can you do that. Look at this little angel. This child is perfect. (A halo appears over D.W.'s head) Punish Arthur. He's the real troublemaker.

Absolutely. Yes, of course, Mom. Arthur, go to your room and never come out!!!

[gulps]

[Arthur punched Jane's arm and crying in off-screen while babbles and looks coos as D.W.]

[off-screen] Ow! Arthur, you punched me! That hurts!

Don't smile to me. [?] This was all your fault.

What did she do that was so bad?

THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT, MOM, I'LL NEVER TELL GO TO YOUR--

*SILENCE!!!* Arthur, can I ask you question?

Oh, I'm sorry about yelling. Will you forgive us?

D.W., I'm trying to do my homework! And there's no such word as busalooey. If you don't stop, I'm gonna wreck the CD!

Mom!

I wouldn't have promised to bring the music to the party if I known I lost it.

Found it!

Great.

Mom! Arthur's gonna wreck my Crazy Bus!

Turn it off! I can't hear you!

Arthur?

Mom and Dad say if you touch it, then they'll adopt you to another country without TV.

D.W., wash up for dinner.

What were they thinking when they invented brothers? What a dopey idea!

D.W., are you OK?

What's the matter?

CRAZY BUS IS GONE! I LEFT IT ON THE THING AND IT'S GONE! GONE!

Well, it didn't just get up and walk away.

I know! Arthur took it!

I didn't!

Honestly, Arthur?

I didn't take it, Dad, really!

Yeah, like you didn't take my snowball out of the freezer!

Let's not start that again.

[starts to cries] Life is so unfair!

While we're out, I expect you to be on your best behavior for Catherine.

I know you have it!

Okay?

Yes.

Good, they're gone!

Aah!

I caught you! Give it back!!

D.W.!!

Catherine

Time out! I'm trying to do my vocabulary homework. What's causing this vexation?

Huh?

We're not on vacation. We live here.

Catherine

Vexation, it means "trouble". What's the trouble?

The trouble is that's mine!

Is not! It's a game I borrowed from The Brain.

Catherine

Phenomenal!

[mumbling] I know he took it!

I caught you! A criminal always returns to the scene of the crime!

You left your possum outside. I was putting it away.

You're gonna make a mistake! And when you do, I'll catch you! Just you wait!

D.W.'s haunting me!

Maybe it's your guilty conscience that's bothering you!

Catherine

D.W., why don't you sit with me?

Aah! D.W. tore my room apart!! [wiggling angrily] She touched all my stuff!! Tell her to stop touching my stuff!!

I was looking for my Crazy Bus.

Catherine

This calls for some Solomon-like wisdom. [hums] D.W., you stay on that side. And Arthur, you stay on that side. No more bothering each other! Boy, I'm good.

Give me my jacket!!

It was on my side! Why do you want it so bad unless my Crazy Bus is in it?!

I don't have your Stupid Bus!!

It's not Stupid Bus, it's Crazy Bus! Stupid Bus is a lame puppet show!!

Pal, stop it!

Catherine

D.W., telephone!

Hello? I can't hear you!

We found your CD! Your father accidentally took it!

What are you doing?

Unlike you, I realized that the only way for two people to stop fighting is for one of them to say, "Stop". I'm forgiving you.

This is a trick! I know that this is a trick!!

Catherine

Aren't you happy that your Mom found your CD?

"Abraham Lincoln was the sixteenth president. He issued the Emancipation Proclamation on January 1st, 1863."

Boy, look at the size of those feet. Where'd he ever buy his shoes? Was he the only giant president?

Lincoln wasn't a giant. The statue is much larger than he was.

Wouldn't you know it? Finally something interesting, and it's a fake.

D.W., can't you please just try to relax and enjoy what's here?

Okay, Daddy. At least I'll get to see the Statue of Liberty.

Um... that's in New York, honey.

What a rip!