[outside with a bat late at night] This is the city. Los Angeles, California. I was working the night watch out of the backyard. Today is Friday. My name is ALF. I carry a bat. Whoa, someone's lurking in the bushes. Cat burglar. [Willie screams and gets caught in ALF's trap] Wha.. Oh, an intruder! [he screams and attacks Willie]
Oh! Oh! Ow! ALF, no! ALF, what are you doing?
Protecting the family from murderers! You were the last person I would have suspected, Willie.
[groans] I'm not a murderer, yet!
Yeah, maybe I should come back when you're in a better mood.
Get me down from here!
[voiceover] Hey, Tanner, is that you?
[ALF leaves the backyard as Trevor opens the gate and checks on Willie]
Trevor, what I'm doing, is very complicated and it requires all my concentration. So if you'd please care to come back later, I'd be happy to answer any questions at that time. Thank you, and goodnight.
Goodnight. [closes the gate]
[angrily] LET ME DOWN!
Okay, okay. [he cuts Willie down]
[lying on the grass] ALF, would you come over here for a minute?
Uh-uh.
Would you just.. Would you mind just coming.. Coming here just within my reach, PLEASE?
You appear to be at the end of my rope.
I thought I told you to go to bed!
Willie, one of us has to insure domestic tranquility. And provide for the common defense. Besides, you didn't say, "Simon says".
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