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195 QUOTES

A character in Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.

Phil Coulson quotes from Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.

Played by Clark Gregg · 195 quotes · page 13 of 13

Phil Coulson

Most-quoted character in Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.: in 195 of its 679 quotes
Most scenes with: Melinda May (47), Mack Mackenzie (27), Daisy Johnson (25)

Scenes with Phil Coulson 179

[Referring to Deke] So, this kid's from the future?

Coulson

Yeah. And in that future, Earth is gone, and the last of humanity is enslaved by alien overlords.

Alien... over... I should've stayed in my cell. You're telling me that we got our asses handed to us by little green men.

Coulson

They were big and blue. But they didn't crack the world apart. They said it was Daisy.

And you're still sending her on missions?

Coulson

I need her leading missions. I got an old injury acting up. Not sure what my timetable is, exactly.

Oh, for the love of flapjacks. Do you ever have any good news?

Coulson

There's a young Inhuman who's seen a better future. We're working toward that.

All Daisy could think about was getting you back. She's not ready for your job, Phil.

Coulson

She has to be. My time is running out.

Because you're being irresponsible. You said you weren't in a hurry to die, but you're not acting like it.

Coulson

So this isn't so much about my stupidity as it is about me dying.

Seems like one thing led to the other.

Coulson

You realize this isn't easy for me, but I've accepted it.

Which is the problem.

Coulson

Maybe I'm reckless. But if this is the end, better to go out doing something that matters.

No. You don't get to make that decision alone. That decision is made with the people who love you.

Coulson

May...

And that's me. I love you. [Coulson is speechless] I thought that would shut you up.

You're late.

Coulson

Hold up. Please. We didn't have a chance to finish our conversation.

I said what I had to say.

Coulson

Melinda...

We have a mission, Phil.

Coulson

[To himself] Good talk, Phil. Good talk.

Just for grins, say I were interested... in someone... anyone. How would I... Like, you got a good thing going.

Don't look at me. Last time I saw Yo-Yo, she lied to me, locked me up, and ran off.

Coulson?

Coulson

Sorry, bro. Apparently, I'm incapable of expressing my feelings or letting people take care of me.

You guys are useless. It's lemons, then.

Coulson

Come again?

Well, in my day, when you wanted to tell someone how you felt, you'd just save up your tokens, you'd buy a lemon, you leave it on their bunk. That's... That's a thing here, right?

Coulson

100%.

Oh, yeah, absolutely.

Coulson

When in doubt, get a bunch of lemons.

[An alien spaceship appears over the Lighthouse.]

GRGeneral Rick Stoner

Please go to the main computer terminal and choose from the following options. If the Lighthouse is experiencing an extreme-weather event, press 1.

KAgent Kim

Agent Coulson, I can't silence the alarms.

SStoner

If you're experiencing a nuclear attack, press 2.

Coulson

Screw it. [Presses 2]

SStoner

For an alien invasion, press 3. You have selected nuclear attack. For your own health, safety, and radiation protection, all outer doors will remain sealed for 15 years.

Did he just say 15 years?

Coulson

How was I supposed to know there would be an "alien invasion" option?

You always listen to the whole menu. Always!

Coulson

[Over the intercom] You may be noticing that the Lighthouse is going into lockdown mode. This is not a drill. The Lighthouse is keeping us safe. All exits, including the hangar, have been sealed to protect us from any outside intrusion. Which is good, 'cause there is currently a sizeable alien spaceship overhead. Oh, and due to a technical malfunction, the Lighthouse thinks we're under nuclear attack, so we may be trapped inside for 15 years... ish.

[Qovas appears on the viewscreen.]

Coulson

I remember you, too. The lighting wasn't great, but the whole vision thing was hard to forget. Did General Hale send you?

You will be dealing with me now. I'm here for what was promised, the Gravitonium.

Coulson

Yeah, that's gonna be a hard pass. Maybe you haven't realized it yet, but this bunker, it's apocalypse-proof. It can withstand a nuclear blast. We have years of food, water, and air.

KKim

[Whispers to May] Is that true?

[Whispers back] Not good food.

Coulson

And pretty soon, the world's gonna realize there's this giant ship in its atmosphere, and I'm thinking, in the current political climate, won't be long before you're blown out of the sky. [To May] Too much?

Coulson

What was Hydra's arrangement with the Confederacy?

To protect the Earth from being attacked.

In exchange for what?

Resources. Inhumans and Gravitonium above all.

Coulson

Why Gravitonium?

Because its power is unlimited. It can bend space, build empires, and destroy them.

Coulson

Couldn't you just find a fun game on your phone instead?

Look, I hate it, too, but I've seen a man go rotten overnight. He might be lost. You don't have to feel like you're responsible.

Coulson

Of course I do. After all our ups and downs, Talbot got shot in the head, and he waited for us to rescue him from Hale.

We were a little busy.

Coulson

Yes, but even after we didn't come, even after Hydra messed with his brain, he still put himself in that machine. He did that for us.

We didn't ask him to.

Coulson

We didn't have to. What?

The first time we met him.

Coulson

When he told us about the peacekeeping force he was sending to the Hub?

I mean, imagine back then if someone had told us that someday we'd be worried about Glenn Talbot.

Coulson

I know. But things evolve. They change. People change.

Coulson

That's the same writing that was in the Lighthouse in the future. What's it say, Deke?

How would I know?

Coulson

Because you lived there.

Well, they don't teach you the language. I can count to five.

Coulson

You lived there for decades, and you know five numbers?

I also know zero, so, no, I know six numbers.

I'm amazed you were able to survive.

I'll take care of it. Go home, Phil, now.

Coulson

Are you giving me an order? 'Cause that sounded like you were giving me an...

Yes, I'm giving you an order! You're just gonna slow me down, so zip it and get to the... [Coulson kisses her]

Coulson

Thought that might shut you up. Now go.

Uh...

Coulson

Not a word, Agent Johnson. That's an order.

Copy that, Hot Lips.

I'm not going to detail what we risked to get this [Centipede serum].

Coulson

I'm aware. And I'm not happy I was left out of that decision.

You wouldn't wake up. But now the decision is yours. You're too weak to stand? Well, we'd like to see you walk out of this room and rejoin the fight. But it's up to you if you think more time is worth it. I've made it clear how I feel.

Coulson

I think I have, too.

But even now the word scares you.

Coulson

I'm just having a hard enough time leaving you behind.

So don't.

Yeah. I'm aware that we rolled the dice with Coulson, and I still believe that we need him for this, but I will admit that I let my emotions get the best of me. I thought that Coulson was the only one who could keep us all on the same page. You would say that's proof that I can't do the job, that I shouldn't lead. Well, I agree. The truth is, I can't hold the team together. But he can. Coulson wants me to call the shots in his absence. Well, that's my decision. Mack should call the shots. He has the biggest heart. I mean, physically, but also, you know... You are our moral center. And, look, I never want to stop being a soldier. He's a general we can all rally behind. Anyone who thinks I'm 100% right about this, raise your hand? :[Everyone raises their hands.]

Coulson

[Enters the room] Couldn't have said it better myself.

Oh, thank god.

Sir, good to see you.

Coulson

Hold the applause. She didn't go through that for nothing. Time to suit up. So what do we do?

We save lives.

Remember how good it felt to walk in here when we first got back? The Zephyr has been the one place we've been able to call home these last few years.

I'll always miss the Bus.

Me, too.

I wish I would've known you guys back then.

We were different people back then.

Coulson

I spent a lot of years– Sorry. I've lived a life– surrounded by heroes. None bigger than all of you. Since the day you joined, same as anyone in the line of duty– heroes, because you– because we sign up to lose each other. To get close to good people– and have them taken away. We've all suffered losses. Never lose sight of that.

I never forget those we've lost.

That's right.

Yeah. That's why we're putting that badge up in the cockpit. To never forget.

Coulson

You don't have to forget. But you have to move on.

No. With respect, sir, you're wrong. We don't move on. We hold that place in our heart, we close it off, we lock the door, we visit from time to time, but we don't move on. Even after we say goodbye.

[Mack is watching a hologram of Coulson]

Coulson

Take it one step at a time. It's not your job to solve every problem. Your job is to put together a team you trust and then to tell them to take it one step at a time. That's all you can do. If you think about everything you're up against all at once, you'll crack. Fury always said, a man can accomplish anything once he realizes he's a part of something bigger.

Still watching those?

I'm hesitant to stop.

He'd be proud. The job suits you. The agents out there know it.

Yeah, well, I'll never be the Director Coulson was.

No, you're a different Director. That's not a bad thing.

[Meeting Coulson for the first time]

Coulson

The powers that be have also recommended...

I told you. We're getting transferred to one of the poles.

Shut up.

Coulson

...have also recommended you for my team.

The f-field team?

This is an honor. Thank you for this opportunity.

Yeah, we would love the chance to discuss it and think about it more, I think, probably, alone.

Coulson

Of course. Look. I know the field isn't for everyone. Some people want to remain behind the scenes. I get it. But to be out there, seeing the lives you're changing, you end up being the one most changed by it.

I found him so inspiring that day. You still needed a push.

Yeah, well, look at what happened because of it. What was that thing you kept on saying? Um, Oh, yes, that's it. "Chin up, Fitz. There's nothing to be afraid of."

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